Stray Memories
by silent wanderer
Summary: I’m Sakura. I lost a childhood friend long ago named Syaoran. I think I’ve found him but this boy's name is Eriol. He reminds me so much of Syaoran. To get close to him though, I need to get rid of his bestfriend,Li who scares the hell outta me COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone!

I've been working on this story for a while now and really, it's pretty much done so all I have to do is upload them onto the site. I hope you enjoy it. (I did my best to keep this story short and sweet.) Odd...I've never written in first person before...ANYWAYS, I'd like to know what you think and if there are any questions, feel free to ask and I'll answer them soon. Thanks!

Because it was difficult for me to think up a title, I might change it, but I'm not sure. Let me know what you think!

* * *

_**Stray Memories**_

**Part I**

_Maybe I am not the one who loves you the most, but you are the one I love the deepest, with all my heart._

_-Hyde_

* * *

Hi. My name is Sakura Kinomoto, eleventh grade student at Haru High school. This is my second year at this prestigious school. My dad really wanted me to go here ever since I was a child. My brother Touya finished High school here. It used to be split into two sections; section A was an all boys' school while section B was an all girls' school. This year, that tradition was altered slightly. The boys and girls sections are now interconnected and is opened to all students. 

It's a high-status school and I worked hard to pull my grades up to get back in this year. I was especially glad when I heard that the two sections were now linked.

* * *

_Over time everyone has a story. This one's mine._

I've never been very social so I can't say I have many friends, just a few acquaintances. But when I was just a child, I remember a dark eyed boy that I spent my time with. I did almost everything with him and then one day…he just disappeared.

The others later told me that Syoaran had been in an accident and he couldn't stay in our neighbourhood anymore. When I asked them why, they said he had amnesia. Of course I didn't know what that was at the time - all I knew was what they told me, which was that staying in our neighbourhood would hurt him and bring back horrible memories.

They never told me what kind of memories, but I always thought that he would've have been fine because if it had been me in his place…I had no doubt that our time spent together would have outweighed any bad memories experienced.

Sad, isn't it? In a way I began to withdraw from the world after that incident. I was really young, but when Syaoran left, I cried. At first I didn't believe my dad that I would never play with Syoaran again, but after a few weeks the truth finally began to set in and I cried. But now? Just maybe I had found Syaoran again.

Maybe.

I first noticed a young boy in the hallways. I don't know why I immediately thought of Syaoran. I thought time had made me forget, but the moment I saw this person, I thought of my childhood friend. I think it might have been the hair. It was dark and shone blue under the sunlight. If there was one thing I remembered clearly about my friend, it was that his hair was always an outrageous colour. Even after being scolded by his parents, Syoaran would always find some way to dye his hair a pink or a green. Of course it was never a permanent colour as he didn't have the money. Plus, the downside of having permanent colour meant that you would have to keep wasting money if you wanted a new colour every week. No, instead he bought the dye that was found in aerosol cans.

I remember because once in awhile he would let me spray his hair pink. He never would let me spray his hair another colour. Just pink. There was some logic behind that, however faint and childish it was but the only thing I remember now when I think back on it was something to do with my name. The name Sakura and flowers.

Anyways, I became obsessed with this blue haired individual. I wanted to ask if he was who I thought he was. But the thought that I would bring back horrible memories always came back to me. Besides, that's the reason he left right? Because if he had not, he would have been reminded of something horrible. For all I knew, I could've been one of those people capable of causing him bad memories. Syoaran's family probably thought it was best for him to start a new life. The amnesia had happened at such a young age and it would've been easier to just start his life over.

I kept an eye on this blue haired boy all through my tenth grade year and learned that his name was Eriol Hiragizawa. This should have discouraged me, but instead I wondered if his parents had purposely changed his name. That's why I had been so glad when the boys' section had been integrated with the girls' section that year. Instead of only catching glimpses of Syaoran, I was capable of maybe approaching him.

I wanted so badly to tell him who I was and I had many chances to confront him. Every time I had my chance however, I would chicken out. He was always hanging around this other kid named Li. They practically went everywhere together. Maybe I was jealous, I don't know. All I did know was that this hazel eyed boy had a glare in his eye that intimidated the hell out of me.

Li was the name that everyone called him. I mean didn't this kid have a first name, or was it a last name? I've never heard anyone call him anything else. I guess Eriol (Really I should be saying Syoaran, but we'll just stick with Eriol-kun for now) knew him more on a personal level and so probably did call him by his first name, but I've never been close enough to hear him call Li's name.

Getting back on track, Li was almost always with Eriol and that left me no room to talk privately with him. Li's hair was a chestnut brown and his short messy style was the only thing that resembled Syoaran. (Even now, I can't help but compare everyone I see to him.) When I finally did meet Eriol for the first time, it was just the first day of spring.

_That day, it was warm._

* * *

I suppose I wasn't looking at where I was going… 

The moment I crashed into the stranger, the force pushed me to the ground.

"Hey! Watch it!…"

"Sorry!" I replied trying to see who it was I was saying sorry to because the crash had pulled my glasses right off my face. I reached around trying to feel them out. I wasn't exactly blind without them, but it was still fuzzy and the bodies walking past me weren't helping. Besides, I was starting to get a little worried that someone had come along and accidentally stepped on them.

"Damn, what'd you do this time? A girl too." A noticeably handsome boy with blue hair elbowed the boy rubbing his shoulder and bent down towards me.

I was speechless as his face came closer and he handed me the glasses I had been looking for.

"These are yours? Sorry, my friend wasn't looking at where he was going. He'll be more careful next time."

I just nodded dumbly. His 'friend' came in view as soon as I put my glasses back on.

_Li. _

Of course who else could it be?

"I'm sorry! It was my fault. Really." I picked myself off the ground and gave Li a slight bow.

Li stopped making such a big production out of rubbing his shoulder and frowned. "Geeze kid, spaz much?" he grunted as a hand came out like lightning and slapped him in the head.

"What the hell was that for? This girl almost breaks off my arm and now you want to give me a headache?"

Eriol's face didn't falter. "Apologize to her."

"Fuck off, you apologize to me." he started rubbing his head at this time. "Besides, she hit me, if I apologize where's thejustice in that?"

"Your _logic,_" Eriol began carefully, "is as stupid as you are. And button up your uniform when you're in school dummy."

I blinked at their confrontation. It was only when I heard a misplaced rustle behind me that I realized a crowd was forming in the halls. I've never been one for attention and the murmers surrounding me were getting to be quite awkward. I gathered my things and cleared my throat.

"Really, it was my fault. I'm just going to go. I'm really sorry." I turned to leave, but jumped at the sound of anger. Real deep anger.

"If you want to apologize, you go and do it. Who asked the dumb brat to apologize anyways? Go to hell." he gave the crowd a withering glare and then turned that glare towards me, making my hair stand on end. He walked off without another word.

I stood, unable to move then. The thought that I had just ruined my best friend's relationship was a little too much. I hadn't exactly planned it like this, but I had finally gotten Li away from Eriol. I should have felt happy about what I did, but I didn't know how to face Eriol. He didn't know who I was and he probably hated me now.

Turning to face him, I hesitated. It was my chance to tell him who I was. After all these years I finally had him in my grasp and what was more, Li was no longer around.

The perfect opportunity.

Nevertheless, that one look I took while facing Eriol hadn't feel right. I bolted. Naturally he didn't try to stop me.

_I hadn't expected him to. _

* * *

When I stopped running, my face felt hot. Too hot. I was blushing? I didn't know whether Eriol was Syaoran, but I knew I had felt something the moment I first saw him. Only just then, it hadn't felt right. Something snapped in me and I ran. I didn't know what was wrong with me…Syaoran and I had been best friends. I couldn't help but think that Eriol wasn't trying hard enough on his part. Didn't I mean anything to him at all? It made me…almost sad to think that none of his old memories had ever resurfaced. 

_It's been a while since I've cried for Syaoran. _

* * *

"Eriol wants to know about his past Sakura. You deserve to know why he really left and why he hasn't tried to make any contact with you." Encouraged, I ran back in the direction whence I came. When I realized he had left, I quickly ran in the direction I usually saw him take home. After all, I had watched him for almost a year now. 

Hiding behind the bushes, five minutes later, my stomach fell.

_Li…why was this guy always around? _"I guess it's my fault he's not walking with Eriol." I made a face. "He yelled at Eriol. Jerk. Syaoran doesn't belong in hell…you do." I rambled on silently as I watched his leisure gait. As I grew all the more bitter, a large dog came running up to Li and I had half a mind to warn the dog to run for his life, else he get kicked to the other side of the world.

However, what I saw then made my breath catch.

Li placed his bag on the ground and bent down slightly to stroke the dog's long white hair. I watched as his eyes flashed with a childish innocence. I watched as his smile melted into a lop sided grin that made the sun pale in it's radiance. All of it made my heart hurt.

I felt like slapping myself. No wonder I couldn't have faced Eriol after the incident earlier. I should have recognized my guilt. The boy in front of me was the person Eriol saw and who I never thought was. Eriol had been able to see past that harsh exterior. What sort of friend was I if I couldn't accept his friend? After seeing Li like this…I wanted to get to know him. I wanted to get to know Eriol's friend because then we'd be closer.

"Do you plan to stay in those bushes forever? I know you're there."

I jumped then. Hesitating, I emerged from my hiding place and noticed the surprised look on his face. Obviously, he had returned to his regular self.

"What the hell do you want now? Just seeing your face makes me want to run. You already apologized. Are you here to beg for forgiveness now?"

His words pierced me. He barely knew me and yet he had already decided that I was just an insignificant individual. I didn't feel that I was justified to get angry however. I had done the same thing to him earlier. "I was looking for your friend Eriol-kun. I thought he would be with you. I really wasn't stalking you or anything."

"Who said anything about stalking?" Li picked up his bag and stood back up. "Besides, you were in those bushes pretty long. Any sane person would have noticed that I'm alone. I can't say that I'm exactly flattered that you were admiring me."

"I wasn't-" I stopped short as he took a step towards me. My height barely reached his shoulder. "You saw me?"

He cocked an eyebrow. "Of course I saw, what am I blind?"

My throat seemed to tighten at his words and my mind flooded with memories I thought I had locked up for good.

-Past-

"Saku!" Syaoran pushed apart the rose bushes to see if his friend was hiding there like she usually was. "Ouch!" pricking his finger, he pulled back and growled. "Why do I get dragged into playing this dumb game?" he sighed and headed for the main door to get a band-aid. "She can wait a little longer for hurting me…" he grumbled as his hand reached out for the door knob, freezing when he caught movement from the corner of his eye.

Sakura huddled just inside the backseat of her father's car.

He blinked in disbelief. "How did I miss that?" forgetting about his band-aid, he smiled mischievously, running to the car window. He pressed his face against the glass before yelling "Found you!"

Sakura jumped from the abrupt declaration. Shaking, she looked up at the window only to widen her eyes in fear at the monstrous look Syaoran made against the glass.

"Hey, how long are you going to stay in there? Come out already. This is dumb and I'm hungry."

Sakura recovered herself and unlocked the door to get out. "You're very good at this game Syaoran. You always find me."

Syoaran shrugged, placing his arms behind his head. "That's only because you're so easy to find. I know I'd be able to find you no matter where you go. I mean what am I, blind?"

Sakura smiled. "You're hand. I'm sorry you got hurt trying to find me."

"What? This?" he showed her his hand which had now swelled up slightly. "Don't tell me you moved so you could see if I was hurt. Give me a break. Is that the reason I saw you?" he thrust his hurt finger out right in front of Sakura's face. "Does this look like it'll kill me?"

Sakura shook her head, wondering why he was getting all mad. "It looks like it hurts though. I can make it better. I know how." before Syaoran could react, Sakura leaned forward and kissed his finger.

"Hey! Stop that! Eww Saku…" he allowed her to usher him into the house where she went in the bathroom and came out with a band-aid.

"I can do it myself." he grumbled, snatching the thing from her fingers and doing his best not to look flustered and embarrassed by her kiss.

-End-

_It's my turn to find you now, isn't it Syoaran?_

"Stop,"

I pulled myself back into reality and looked up at Li.

"looking at me like that!" his temper flared and the kind eyes I saw before were now completely gone. I also couldn't help but notice that the dog was also missing. Probably scared by his anger.

Refusing to yell back, I averted my gaze. "Sorry, I-"

"Stop apologizing! Damn it, you're starting to give me a headache." he closed his eyes and then reopened them. "Look, let's get a few things straight. I'm not going to get between you and your boy toy _Eriol-kun_," he imitated. "But don't think that I'm going to help you nab him just because we're friends."

Undignified, Sakura's fists tightened. "I didn't say anything about him being my boy toy."

"Whatever. I've seen the way you girls stare at him. Like he's a slab of meat for the main course." he shuddered. "I'm not helping. I hate girls like that."

His words wanted to make me cringe, but instead I replied, "It's not like that. Eriol-kun is special…I wanted to talk to him because maybe he'll get to know me more and maybe even you and I…" I blushed wondering if the words I just blabbed were as outgoing as I thought they were.

"You…" Li's face was in bewilderment. "What are you…saying?"

"Nothing! Forget it." If I had told him everything then, I knew there was a good chance he would've leaked out everything to Eriol, thinking my story was just a way to get closer to him. I couldn't have that. I'd just have to find Eriol th next day and try to confront him.

_I just wanted to get closer to him so I could be happier._

"I didn't mean to bother you or waste your time. Really. I'm going to go now okay?"

Li gave me a glare as if to say 'good riddance'. I hoped he would've shown me some of the kindness I saw earlier, but all proof that he was capable of showing such compassion was long gone now.

_As I walked away from him that day, I was left feeling strangely bereft. And if I didn't hear wrong, under the rustling of the cherry blossoms trees, my own heart was saying there was no turning back._

* * *

"My notebook…" I dumped all the contents of my bag out and only then was I satisfied that my Japanese history notebook was missing. "I remember I put it in my bag yesterday. Maybe I left it in class?" 

That's when it hit me. I crammed my books into my bag and ran out the door.

"It must have accidentally dropped when I crashed into Li-san." I ran as fast as I could've to the train station. If I arrived earlier, I would have had a better chance of finding it. "Maybe it's still lying on the ground. I was one of the last people out of the school yesterday…there should still be a good chance of it being there."

* * *

Anxiously, I approached the area where I had crashed into Li and with a keen eye, searched every nook and cranny; anywhere the book could have been kicked into. It was nowhere in sight. 

"I was in such a rush to get away from Eriol-kun, I didn't even check if anything had fallen out of my bag during the crash." my mind flew back to yesterday in order to logically go over what happened. I couldn't stay there very long however. Eriol's face kept appearing in my head and all I could picture was his smile as he asked if I was alright.

I blushed furiously until it occurred to me that Eriol may have picked up my book; just like he had picked up my glasses. I looked around for anyone that may have seen him and settled for a few girls walking down the hall.

"Excuse me, have you seen Eriol-kun anywhere?" I was pretty sure they knew who I was talking about, but I noticed that they looked at me with a frown.

A girl with big blue eyes answered. "He's in the cafeteria."

"Thank you very much!" I smiled warmly, wondering whether their deepening frown was supposed to discourage me. I suppose it should have as I knew the cafeteria they were referring to wasn't the regular cafeteria. It was the cafeteria that actually served meals like a restaurant and only those that could afford it would go inside. I had never been inside before now and I wondered what it would look like.

When I entered the glass doors, I realized that I recognized no one. There was no cafeteria line up and the tables and chairs were decorated ornately with flowers and rich coloured table cloths. Half of the cafeteria stretched outside almost like a balcony, separating the inside and outside with more glass doors. The ceilings were high and the scent of cooking food enveloped the air I was breathing. It was all very pretty.

I looked around for a familiar blue haired boy and saw that it really wasn't hard to spot him. Awkwardly, I went across the room and through the glass doors to the large balcony. Eriol sat by himself at a small table, one arm resting on the table and another on the back of his chair. He seemed to be enjoying the spring air.

"Eriol-kun?"

He looked up and then gave a kind smile. "Sakura-chan."

I was hardly able to hide my blush. If he really was Syaoran, this would've been the first time in eight years that I heard my name come from his lips. "You know my name?"

He smiled expectantly. "Sorry. I read it off the history notebook you dropped yesterday. You were in such a rush, you must have forgotten it."

"Oh." I said in relief. "So you do have it. That's great."

"I thought you were angry at me because you took one look at me and ran. That's why I gave the book to Li. He said he would give it back to you when I gave it to him this morning."

"I'm not angry at all Eriol-kun! I'm sorry for running." I suddenly felt extremely rude. "I hope you can resolve things with your friend."

Eriol laughed and I saw that I had nothing to compare the sound to. It'd been too long since I heard Syaoran laugh. Nevertheless, it must've sound as warm as his.

Eriol rose from his chair in a swift movement. "You forgot all about your book as soon as I said something about you being angry at me."

"Huh?…I uh," I looked to the ground. "I'm..sorry." I said uncomfortably. "I didn't mean to offend you yesterday."

Eriol shrugged. "Not at all. You don't know me, I don't know you, why would I be offended?"

Despite his smile, his words hurt. I wanted to leave suddenly. "That's right, you wouldn't happen to know where your friend is now, would you?"

He tapped his long pointer finger on his chin. "He likes to take walks. He's probably somewhere around the grounds." his smile softened then.

I looked up at him, half expecting him to tell me this was all a joke. That he was Syaoran.

"Will you go and search for him?"

There it was again…that calm look…as if he knew I was searching for him. But why? If he knew, why wouldn't he reveal himself?

"Yes. I'm going to find him." I looked up directly into his eyes, almost determinedly. And yet that level and knowing look didn't leave his eyes. "I need my book for class this afternoon." I added.

"Good luck then." was all he said. "Li isn't the easiest to get along with." he gave a small wave and with his hands in his pockets, he walked back inside.

_I was unable to confront you again. After all this time…it just has to be this hard._

* * *

"Hey! Please wait-" I watched in disbelief as Li's body vanished from my sight into the crowd. At this point, I was starting to think he was purposely ignoring me. 

"…"

When I had first spotted him, he was in the courtyard, looking quite uncomfortable with the attention he was receiving from three young girls. They seemed to be pressing him for something and I watched as he tried to fend them off…or at least that's what it looked like he was doing. Oddly enough, the moment I came within five metres of him, his attitude changed completely and both he and the three girls started walking away.

Undefeated, I followed them, only to lose sight of him in the hallway crowd. Incidentally, the girls he had been with seemed just as puzzled as me to where he had disappeared to. This is what started my suspicions. He couldn't have possibly been ignoring me.

Walking back outside, I began strolling around the school's path, hoping I'd run into him. I didn't have very much time until the school bell would ring and I couldn't believe my ears when it did ring. What was wrong with this person? I was almost sure he had seen me…why did he leave in such a rush? I sighed and went to class. I'd have to try looking for him during lunchtime.

That was exactly where I was then, and where Li had once again vanished from my sight. All I wanted was my book! I felt like crying. I could only imagine the things the sensei would say to me. I wasn't about to be scolded on Li's account!

Following him out of the crowd, I watched him dodge around the corner of the school. Sighing, I resumed the chase, but as I winded the corner, I could see no one. I felt like pulling my hair out.

I checked my watch and heaved in defeat. I only had a few minutes left to prepare for a lecture from the history sensei. Today was the day when our sensei would call on someone in the class and have them read out a memorized section of the history book. That book I had…it was the notebook I needed, in case he also wanted us to read out our responses from the day before. Everything I had written was in that book.

"Darn you…" my fists tightened in anger. "Would it kill you to give me back my book? Bastard…"

"Hey, who the hell are you calling those names?"

I blinked in surprise. "Who…w-who said-" I looked around me. I was perfectly alone.

"Idiot…" the voice said in exasperation. "Look up would you."

I did and saw none other than Li lounging on a sturdy branch up in the tree just above me.

"How did you-" I stopped short, getting directly to the point. "My book. I need it for my next class."

"Why?" he continued looking at the sky as if I weren't there.

I thought his question was just to make me angry. "I'll get in trouble."

"Well, just don't go to class then. Dummy. I mean why would you go to class only to get yelled at?" he stretched lithely on the branch and if I hadn't been so irritated, I would've admired his balance.

"I've been trying to get your attention for a while. I know you noticed."

He finally acknowledged me with a look. "Yeah so? I told you just looking at you gives me a headache."

This time, I couldn't hide my anger. "Why you!…"

He seemed so amused by this, he burst out laughing. Between the chuckles he managed to make out, "So you're vocabulary is made up of more than the word 'sorry'?" he stopped laughing altogether and looked down at me. "That's good. Just because you don't know me, doesn't mean you have to be all nice and flowery. I hate it when people force themselves to be nice."

I met his gaze. "It's because I don't know you that I'm being polite, it's not nice to be rude to someone you don't know."

"I didn't say that." he went back to looking at the sky. "I meant that you could have yelled back at me when I was being rude to you. People who just take everything the world hands out to them; who accept everything, good and bad. They're useless."

"What if they can't do anything about it?" I grumbled, stopping once again and peering up at Li. This was the second time I saw that sliver of kindness and sense in him. "You know, if you're capable of being nice, why don't you actually use that to your advantage and **be **nicer?"

"Because the world needs people like me, that's why. Just like I'm sure they need cherry blossom girls like you."

I wondered if he knew my name with that comment. "Did you read my book?"

"I may have ran my eyes over it."

"You can't do that, it's rude. Besides, class is almost starting. Could you give it back now? Thanks for keeping it safe."

"Who says I did that?"

I was alarmed by that. "What? Don't you have it? Eriol-kun said-"

"Oh, I see. So I am the in between guy." He sighed and pushed himself up so he was sitting on the branch instead of lying on it. "Well never mind, that guy is too stupid for me to hang around with anyway." he waved his hands in front of his face.

"You're still angry at each other? But I thought you had resolved everything." I made a guilty face. "Sorry."

"You-" he swung himself down with a smooth motion. "are really," he pushed a finger against my forehead. "stupid." he looked down at me with a superior glare. "I'm leaving now. I feel suffocated by this conversation. See-ya." he gave a small wave as he started to amble off.

"My book." I ran in front of him. "I need it. I'll leave you alone after."

"You mean until you want to get closer to that so called friend of mine. Then you'll come running back. Odd…I always thought that I was the better looking one." the bell rang just then. "If you don't start running, you're going to be late."

"Li-san. Please give me my book."

He blinked, going back to his amused expression. "Li-san huh?" he smiled in a shrewd way . "That has a nice ring to it. It's always with the Li-kun, Li-kun." His voice went a few octaves higher. "Li-kun! Can I walk with you? Li-kun! Would you like to share my lunch?" he returned to his normal tones. "Li-san shows respect. I like that. What's your name again cherry blossom?"

"If you know it, then don't ask!" my temper flared. "Give me the book!"

He reached for his back pocket, unruffled by my anger. "I know your name?" his face lit up. "You mean this book?"

Just as I hoped, Li pulled out a small notebook titled Japanese History. I was ecstatic as I snatched it out of his hands.

"Yes, thank you. I'm going to class now, you should too." I quickly ran off.

_I didn't know then that I had been tricked._

* * *

"That bastard…" 

As I held the buckets of water just outside my classroom, the soft snickers of students passing the hallway made me want to weep in pity. Pity for myself.

I was tricked!

_I should have known…That bastard!_

To be continued…

* * *

Yes, I'm sure everyone's wondering what Li did to Sakura as I'm sure you can just imagine. I really like writing their conversations...even if it's just yelling and nonsense. Well thanks for taking the time to read this! I'll update this one in a more consistent matter hahaha. 

-silent wanderer


	2. Chapter 2

Hello, hello! how is everyone? Thank you for the comments! I'll just take this time to clear up my bad writing skills.

ummm, let's see, how to explain how come Sakura thinks Eriol is Syaoran...well he had the accident when they were around six...or was it seven (hehe, this is how well I know my own story...) BUT it was a young age and Syaoran rarely ever had brown hair, so Sakura doesn't connect the brown hair as something that significant in locating Syaoran. But about the eyes...uhhh maybe it's because they're both dark colours or maybe...(sigh) I'd like to say it's been WAY TOO long and she can't recall, but that would be far fetched wouldn't? Not remembering your best friends eye colour...then again, she is seventeen and that's a long time, right? You guys are going to have to take it easy on me for that one hahaha (moves away nervously) I'll try to think of a reason for you guys soon.

Anyways, please enjoy this next chapter and don't forget to leave a review for this little writer.

* * *

**_Stray Memories_**

**Part II**

As I held the buckets of water just outside my classroom, the soft snickers of students passing the hallway made me want to weep in pity. Pity for myself.

I was tricked!

_I should have known…That bastard!_

* * *

By the time class was let out, my arms felt like jelly. I had been put through humiliation because of Li. 

_Here's how it happened…_

I was sitting in my regular seat, right in the back, beside the window. I wasn't that scared that he would call me. The sensei rarely did. However, I got uncomfortable around presenting in front of people.

Then, I was called.

I rose from my seat as I was asked to read out my response. I opened my book and read what was written on the paper.

"During the Heian period, much of the political influence was under the Fujiwara family who, over several years had intermarried with the imperial family. This strategy is truly quite ingenious because who wouldn't want to get rich fast? Pick up some woman from a wealthy family and get all the political offices in Kyoto. I'm surprised suitors weren't lining up by number. But karma…" I stopped at this point and scanned through the rest of the response. It seemed to follow a pattern. Looking uneasily up, I swallowed as the sensei snatched the book up from my hands.

He scanned the response over with distaste. Just when I thought he would begin yelling, he said "You took the time to write this garbage. Please don't stop now." his face radiated with anger as he allowed me to finish.

I nodded, reading the rest as he held out the book in front of me. "But…b-but karma is a funny thing. The ability o-of the Fujiwara leaders began to wane after 1016. The l…last uh, successful leader was Fujiwara Michinaga…who must have been watching even in the after life, at what a crappy job his successors were doing. At this point, he probably thought his entire life had been a waste. After all, no guy would want to get hitched with any girl. A man's got standards. Instead, he was probably forced by his parents to marry some broad that was completely revolting. Imagine their wedding night! You've got to pity a guy who went through all that, just to see some idiots unable to carry on the Fujiwara name. Anyways, land owners soon hired samurai…you know those ugly guys who hid under heavy armour so they could show off to all the women. Well, let me tell you something…" I hesitated. "Women in the past didn't swoon because they were all manly. Hardly, it was because of their stench. Think about it…It's not a very clean era…people didn't practice good hygiene and these guys were under thick armour…Geez I'd swoon." I bit my lip. "Thus, Eastern Japan's military class became more influential?"

The next thing I knew I was outside in the hall, holding two heavy water buckets.

"Li…you jerk."

* * *

After classes, I didn't think I could show my face to the public any longer. By now, almost half the school had heard about my creative writing skills. I wanted to wring Li's neck. He knew I had been so eager to get back my book that I wouldn't have thought twice about checking if it _was_ the right book. I took one look at the title, Japanese History and thought it was mine. It didn't even cross my mind that he would give me a fake. Who had that much time to make up snide remarks like that? 

I just wanted to go home and block this day from my memory. The only thing was that I still needed my book for tomorrow and where Li actually was currently was something I didn't know. Silently, I wondered if this gave me another reason to see Eriol.

This time, I would tell him who I was. I smiled at my new found courage and quickly ran up to catch him. I might not have known Li's classes, but I knew most of Eriol's. His classroom was almost completely empty when I got there.

"Excuse me, do you know if Eriol-kun has left?"

A young boy, wearing large spectacles looked up from his books. "He just left." a look suddenly came over his face. "Hey, aren't you the one everyone's been talk-"

I didn't let him finish. Just ran in the direction Eriol would be taking. I was the class fool. Now everyone knew it was me who was stupid enough to read such a response in class.

_I guess I was stupid for trusting Li._

* * *

When I caught glimpse of Eriol, he was just outside the school, completely surrounded by a flock of girls. His thoughtful face was almost too much. It seemed like he was listening to every word the girls were saying simultaneously. When had Syaoran grown such an attentive expression? He had never been quite that social. 

Finally, he looked up and pin pointed me with a steady gaze. His eyes were inviting, but I was intimidated by the crowd surrounding him. All I wanted was some time alone with him! It was then that I knew I should have told him everything that morning. Nevertheless, I watched as Eriol worked his magic and in just a few minutes, the people began to lessen. One by one, they said their goodbyes to Eriol. They didn't seem angry as they left and that made me wonder in awe at what he said to them to get them to leave so easily without trouble. It made me blush to think he could read past my insecurity.

While he was waving warm goodbyes to the last few individuals, I gathered my courage and made my way to him.

"Eriol-kun, I've been wanting to ask you something."

He cocked his head to me, as the last girls rounded the corner. "Hmm, you seemed scared of the crowd."

"That's not uncommon. Most people would be."

"Those girls weren't afraid to talk to me. I didn't think I was that scary." he straightened and looking up at him, I blushed. "So," he smiled. "What do you want to say? I got rid of them for you you know. Earlier today it seemed like you wanted to tell me something."

I swallowed. "It's just that I was wondering…I have some questions and I don't want to pry, so you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but please…" I fumbled frantically with my hands. "Could you tell me a little…really not a lot-" I took a deep breath. "What's the earliest memory you have of your childhood!" I just came out and asked. It had been too long and a part of me almost needed to know who he really was.

Eriol just looked at me through watchful eyes for a moment. "My earliest memory is it? And why is Sakura-chan so curious as to that?"

"Oh…it's because," I wondered if he was beginning to think that I was being too bold for my own good. I knew I was beginning to think it myself. "I want to know more about Eriol-kun… Because I'm searching for something and it's important. That's all I can really say now because I don't want to…it's important." I knew I sounded like an idiot.

He seemed to think for a while. "Well then, if it's going to help Sakura-chan's search, I suppose I have no choice." he placed a finger on his chin. "My earliest memory… would have to be moving from America to Japan."

I froze. A part of me waited for him to start laughing and say he was joking, but when he didn't my mind whirled. "America to Japan?" My mind screamed out that that was impossible. "But how old were you? You're not a foreigner, you can't be."

"Foreigner? Well not exactly. I'm Japanese only on my mother's side. I didn't know the language when I first arrived. But then I was young. Four or five at most."

"Four or five? That's impossible, you're father is an American?" I realized that I had never seen Syaoran's parents, just his guardians that would take care of him, while his parents were away. Even my earliest memory with Syaoran was when we were six.

_Was it? _

I couldn't remember… I had hidden all our memories in the back of my head. Never once did I take them out to review. It had always been too painful and I had recoiled every time I had tried. Now where had they all gone? I couldn't recall…

"Sakura-chan? Are you okay? You look sick."

"Eriol-kun!" I took a large step towards him and reached out for his uniform lapel. "It's me, Sak-" Before I could finish, an icy voice stopped me cold.

"Don't tell me here's another admirer."

I froze and spun my head around slowly, coming in contact with the darkest glare I had ever come across. My throat caught and I was unable to finish what I was going to say.

"This is too much. Way too fucking much."

"Li-kun." Eriol said curiously. "Your eye's are SO cold. And your hair is everywhere. Did you get in another fight?"

Li's fists shook beside him. I wanted to back away, but I couldn't move.

"Damn it. It's always like this. This look is the only one that'll keep all those annoying girls away."

Just when I thought he was going to turn his anger towards me, his mood changed drastically.

He threw himself on Eriol in a sudden flash. "Wahh…Eriol. They're all animals. I was so scared!"

Eriol rolled his eyes, patting his friend on the back. "It's okay, it's all over now." he consoled.

Li looked up over Eriol's shoulders and locked eyes with me. I still couldn't move. His eyes were unreadable.

What was wrong with this guy? A second ago, he looked like he was capable of murder. Now he was clinging to Eriol and being comforted. His unpredictable air made me uneasy.

His lips went grim. "Oh, it's just you." He smiled mischievously. "I guess you're alright. Eriol lovers don't bother me as much." he released Eriol's neck as I hid my blush. "I'm hungry, let's go get something to eat Eriol. I want ramen."

Eriol nodded and turned to me. "I'll talk to you later then."

I held out a hand in protest. "Hey, wait. I still need to ask-"

"Get lost, brat. The headache's starting to build up again."

I felt a growl at the back of my throat. "You have no right to call me a brat! You deserve a headache for the one you caused me today."

Li's face brightened. "Oh? And how did your history class go today? Well I take it?"

"That's right. Did you get your book back in time for class?" Eriol asked.

"Oh, I got a book back alright. The wrong one! Do you know what I had to go through during class?"

"No…" Li answered. "But I've heard rumours."

"You're the cause of them!" I pointed a shaking finger at him. "Apologize! Who has that much time to write all that stuff anyways? Apologize now!"

Eriol glanced suspiciously at Li. "What's she talking about?"

Li tugged at his friend's sleeve. "Eriol…I'm hungry. Let's leave the crazy person alone."

Eriol hesitated, but finally relented. "Did you want to join us?" he directed at me. "If he did anything wrong, I'll get him to apologize."

I blushed at his offer. "Actually, I don't think that would be a good idea, I have-"

"See, quit bothering her, let's go Eriol." he must have seen my irritation or maybe he saw my blush because in the next moment, he jumped onto Eriol's back. "If you insist on talking to her, you have to carry me. I'm tired." he watched my expression go from irritation to bewilderment and he immediately took it as envy. With heavy lidded eyes, he rested his head on Eriol's broad shoulders and snuggled in as if to sleep.

I didn't know why I was getting angrier, but the more he cuddled, the more I flushed and had to force myself to avert the direction of my gaze.

"Damn, you're heavy Li." Eriol sighed. "Let's go eat. Then we'll clear up any further problems." he smiled at me. "It'd be nice if you came."

"Hai." I answered, deciding the only way to get my chance to talk to Eriol alone would be to make Li get angry at me again. In reality, I wondered whether he had actually been angry at Eriol to begin with. Anytime now, I was hoping Eriol would let go of Li and just let his body drop to the ground.

* * *

As we walked, you would have had to be blind to not see the attention we were receiving. It could have been because Li had practically fallen asleep on Eriol's shoulder and was being piggy backed by him, but it could just have easily have been because I was standing by two extremely handsome boys. I believed it was the latter. The looks and whispers were almost making me apprehensive. 

_I didn't belong in this picture._

* * *

I didn't want to admit it, but Li was quite handsome. As he lay on Eriol's shoulder, I studied him quietly. His thick hair being blown with the wind, a few chestnut strands pressing against his flawless skin. It was quite a contrast to Eriol's own dark blue strands that brushed over his calm, steady cobalt eyes. There were times when I saw a pair of thin rimmed glasses frame his face, but for the most part, he left his eyes unadorned. 

"Is there something the matter?"

I snapped myself out of my thoughts then. "No, I was just thinking that you're very handsome Eriol-kun." I blushed, surprised that I had let my thoughts out so easily. I smiled uneasily as he appeared slightly shocked by my declaration.

He chuckled. "Thank you. Is that why you were looking at me like I had something on my face?"

I nodded silently as from the corner of my eye, I noticed Li reposition his head uncomfortably, most likely uncomfortable for overhearing the conversation.

_Liar, stop faking sleep._

"Before Li-kun arrived, were you about to say something?" he changed the direction of his gaze to me.

"I wanted to let you know something…that's all." I rubbed my right arm awkwardly, warming myself up from the spring breeze.

"Did you still want to tell me?"

"No, I'll tell you later. I guess it's not that important. I'm…"

Li let out a small mumble as if to warn me that he could overhear anything I was planning to say. His warning almost touched me. I didn't care though. This wasn't about him.

"I'm searching for someone. Someone…" I felt my heart constrict miserably. "who's special to me."

"Oh? Is he lost?" On Eriol's lips, a small smirk was playing on his lips.

I looked up at him. "No, no he probably isn't. I haven't seen him for a few years."

"Him? Do you know where he is?"

"I have an idea. He…" another constriction in my chest. "doesn't remember me."

Eriol's eyes glazed over with something I couldn't recognize. I wondered if he was recalling something from the past; if he suddenly remembered me.

Li was quiet on his back.

"And how," Eriol whispered. "does my past have anything to do with your search?"

That was the question, wasn't it? That was the moment everything was leading up to. I needed to tell him who he was.

"Eriol-kun, I'm Sak-"

Li interrupted then with a loud yawn right in Eriol's ear. "Are we there yet?…" he mumbled.

"You're interrupting dummy." Eriol seemed to forget about the conversation and instead, said to me, "Well, if you want to know anything more about me, feel free to ask. Anything to help you," he smiled that calm, knowing smile as we apparently arrived at a ramen stall. "Sakura-chan."

My urge to tell him who I was, was growing stronger by the minute and I felt like my heart had hit it's limit.

_Even as you said my name, taking the words right out of my mouth…you didn't know who I was._

* * *

As he spoke my name, I thought I saw a small look of surprise on Li's expression, but it disappeared the moment Eriol dropped him to the cement. 

It couldn't have been a coincidence. Twice Li had interrupted what I was about to say. Why couldn't he have just gone away and left me alone?

He rubbed his back in objection. "Watch it. Can't you be a little gentler?"

I bent down and offered my hand, though still angry at him. He looked up at me and this time I knew I saw surprise before it turned into suspicion.

"I didn't ask for your help stupid. I'll get up by myself thanks." he did as he said and brushed off his clothes, before taking the middle seat of the large ramen stall.

A small growl crawled it's way up my throat as I saw his attempt to separate me and Eriol. I sighed, thinking it better to leave it alone as I took the seat just right of him. As he ordered, my mind quickly streamed over the possibilities of revealing my secret to Eriol after eating.

I had already decided that it didn't matter if Li overheard. I was dead sure I recognized my best friend. I just wanted to tell him who I was. Then we could resume the life we had before his accident. We could be friends again.

_At that moment, there was nothing I wanted more._

* * *

Li rested his head on the palm of his right hand. He had finished eating over ten minutes ago. I was still playing with my noodles. 

"Hey…" he frowned when I didn't reply. "Are you listening? Dummy, stop playing around with your food. Precious money was used to buy that meal. Have the decency to eat it."

"Maybe if you leave me and Eriol alone, I'll finish it." I grumbled, soft enough so that only he could hear.

Eriol had just finished eating and was paying the bill.

Li looked up in disbelief. "What did you…" he sighed. "Screw it, you wouldn't know help if it hit you on the head."

"Help? What kind of help did you give me? Leave me alone."

"Fine." he stood up abruptly, causing the bowls to shake on the wooden table. "Have all the time you want with your boy toy. Clueless brat." he ran his long fingers through his hair. "Eriol, I'm leaving. Damn, my head hurts!"

I stuck my tongue out as he strolled off. "I know what help is and you weren't helping." I muttered, digging into my ramen, satisfied that he was gone. It actually hadn't taken much for him to leave.

Eriol also rose from his seat then. I looked at him with noodles hanging from my mouth. He was watching Li walk off.

Figuring it was too late to go after him, I stayed happily with Eriol, eating the rest of my ramen.

"Sakura-chan, Li-kun still has your book am I right?"

I almost choked. I let him get away again! "Ah! Wait!" but he was already cloaked by the darkness of night. I didn't want to imagine what the sensei would do to me tomorrow if I read another response like today.

"Li-kun…" Eriol began. "He used to go through many headaches."

In surprise, I glanced at Eriol. A look of worry was evident in his expression.

"Oh?" I asked, not entirely interested by Li.

"Hmm." Eriol answered. "He complains, but then he has the right I suppose. When I first met him as a child…"

I stopped eating for a moment.

"he had headaches that caused him so much pain, he was taken to the hospital where they treated him."

I looked down at my soup. "Did he? Why are you telling me this?" I stubbornly fought off the sympathy I was developing towards Li.

Eriol blinked. "He hasn't complained of any headaches for over seven years. Li doesn't know much of his past and many of our classmates used to spread rumours about him."

"What kind of rumours?" I asked.

"That he made his parents angry enough as to force them to erase his mind and start completely over with him. Almost like a new child to raise."

"But you're friends with him." I said quietly.

"I didn't believe in the rumours. I had just moved to Japan and he was the first real friend I had. No one gave him a chance, so I did." Eriol looked up at me, emotion showing in his eyes. "Li still doesn't know much of his past. When I became his friend, his headaches occurred less frequently."

"You make him sound like a monster. If he didn't let any of his classmates get near him, why did he let you?"

Eriol bent and leaned towards me slightly. "The sensei always tried to strike a conversation with him, but he never seemed interested in anything. During free time, he liked to sit by the school's garden." He was now just a few inches away from me. "One day," he smiled calmly. "I told him the cherry blossom tree he was sitting by was pretty."

I couldn't contain a blush as Eriol was so close, but his story kept me from moving away.

"Li told me that day…" he quoted, "My favourite flower is Sakura." he backed away. "Just like your name."

"You think…I'm causing him headaches?"

Eriol came over and ruffled my hair. "Just the opposite. Maybe you can stop them."

I stood up in surprise. "I-I can't help him. You heard him, I cause the headaches." I emphasized cause. How could _I_ help Li?

Eriol smiled down at me, taking my hands in his. "I think you're searching for the wrong thing, Sakura-chan."

"The wrong thing?" I asked.

He nodded patiently. " Li is searching for something too. I see it in his eyes when we're alone or even when he thinks no one is looking."

"But, I know what I'm searching for. What are you saying?"

"Sakura-chan knows what it's like to be searching for something doesn't she? Sakura- chan knows what it's like." He continued to smile that heart-wrenching smile of his. "That means you can relate to him.

"Yes…" I felt his grip on my hands tighten in a comforting way. "But, what's he searching for? He has you as a friend."

"Sakura-chan? Why were you asking me those questions earlier?"

I didn't want to meet his eyes. I didn't understand Eriol. Why did he have to keep pushing me away like this? Even with my hands clasped in his, a coldness enveloped me. "Eriol-kun, do you remember an important person in your life. Someone special you spent your time with during your childhood?"

"No. Li was my first friend I spent time with. My only childhood friend I still have now."

"Well, do you remember if your parents ever spoke to you about an accident you were possibly in at the age of seven?"

There was a heavy in the silence in the air.

"An accident while you were in Japan?" I repeated.

Then, something like sadness appeared in Eriol's eyes. "Sakura-chan, I think you're confused. I'm not who you think-"

I yanked my hands away from him. I wanted to cover my ears. "It's okay if you don't remember." I looked up at him, trying to fight back the tears building at the back of my eyes and making them hot. "I don't blame you, but if you tried to…you might remember." I asked pitifully.

His image was growing blurry.

He tried to reach out to comfort me, but I recoiled, pulling my hands away from his reach "No. You are him. I know you are. We played together and-and you let me dye your hair. Sometimes, you liked to make it blue. Try, just try."

I watched as he stood there helpless to my throttle of accusations. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes at that point. He couldn't recall who I was. "If it hurts to remember, It's okay. You can stop. I don't want to hurt you."

I just wanted to be happy. I knew I was asking too much as I looked into his pained eyes. I tried to smile, but I didn't know if it worked. "I'll leave you alone."

I understood why Eriol wanted me around and had even invited me to eat with him and Li. He thought that I would be capable to fix Li.

_But how could I mend his heart when mine probably felt worse than his? _

* * *

_**Past**_

"Sakura-chan's no fun!" a pretty, blue haired girl screamed for the whole class to hear, just after school.

Sakura's back tensed as she clung onto her backpack straps tightly.

The girl that made the comment appeared in front of Sakura, her arms on her hips.

"Did you hear me Sakura-chan? You- are- no- fun." her superior tone gained the confidence of the other girls.

"That's right. You're so greedy Sakura-chan. I hate you!" another girl piped in.

"Why won't you leave Syaoran-kun alone?" a raven haired girl, with shiny ivory eyes said angrily.

The first girl nodded in compliance with her supporters. "You never play with us during free time and you never let us play with Syaoran-kun. You're so mean Sakura-chan."

Sakura took a step back from her accusers, intimidated by the large crowd. Even those that weren't joining the group and creating their own hurtful words were basking in her predicament.

"You can play with Syaoran too." Sakura entreated.

"Why? Because you'll let us?" a girl chimed.

Sakura shook her head, afraid of the allegation she was being put under. "I think Syaoran would like it if you asked to play with him."

"No way!" the blue haired girl drawled. "We always try to play with you and Syaoran-kun, but you just hog him to yourself. You're so mean and greedy. I hate you so much! Why do you always get to play with Syaoran-kun?"

Sakura hesitated. She wanted to comfort the girl, but she was sure it would make her angrier. "I'm sorry." was all she could think of. And she really meant it. Her classmates, particularly the girls, always treated her like this. She always tried to get Syaoran to play with the others, but he wouldn't go near them. That's why she stayed so close to him.

Because she thought he would be lonely if she left him alone.

"Maybe if you leave Syaoran-kun alone he would come play with us. Have you ever thought of that? All you think about is you."

"I'm sorry. I'll stop, I really will stop playing with him all the time if you don't like it." Sakura's bottom lip shook slightly. She just wanted to run home so she could see happy faces. Faces that didn't accuse her of just being herself. Even Touya's badgering never hurt her like her classmates words. But unlike with Touya, Sakura was incapable of defending herself. There was something about yelling at someone so unfamiliar that made Sakura cringe. How could anyone ever be rude to someone they didn't really know?

Sakura tried to walk away from the crowd, but once again the girls stopped her from her dash to freedom.

"You make me so mad Sakura-chan. I really like Syaoran-kun."

"I-I didn't know…" Sakura watched the girl's fists shake. "I'll leave him alone, I don't want to make you mad Tomoyo-chan."

Sakura saw a few boys from the other class come towards her. An evil glint shone in their eyes. She backed away in fear. Roughly, she was pushed on the shoulder. Fumbling, she managed to stay on her feet.

"Look, she doesn't even try to push back." the boy who did the pushing cried. "You were right Tomoyo-chan. She has no backbone."

"Hey, I didn't tell you to hit her." Tomoyo frowned.

In that very next moment, just as one boy began pulling at the lapel of her uniform, Sakura saw a blur of something dark. When she blinked, she was no longer being held. Instead, the boy handling her had been shoved to the ground. Sakura's eyes flew to the figure who had saved her.

"Syaoaran…"

He turned to give her a careful look, until the pretty girl who had been accusing Sakura, pushed herself in front of him.

"Syaoran! Do you think we could walk home together?" she smiled warmly. "I like you Syaoran."

Sakura held her breath at what Syaoran would do, a part of her mind hoping that he would return the girl's feelings. Maybe then she could walk home without being bothered.

"I don't like being called Syaoran. Don't call me that."

"What? But that's your name. Didn't you hear me? I like-"

"I heard you." Syaoran replied. "Don't bother Sakura anymore. I don't like girls like that."

As Syaoran tugged Sakura away from the scene and she couldn't help but feel sympathy for Tomoyo-chan.

When they were far enough, that the school was no longer in sight, Sakura asked "Syaoran?"

"Yeah?"

"What do you want me to call you?"

He looked at her and made a face. "Syaoran. What else would you call me?"

"Oh. But you told Tomoyo-chan-"

"Forget what I told Tomoyo-chan. I don't like girls like her." he shot her a glare. "And would you stop apologizing already? You apologize for things that aren't even your fault."

"But she said I take up your time and she isn't lying."

"So? That's a dumb excuse. Anyways, stop getting into trouble, I always have to bail you out." he sighed and placed his hands on the back of his head. "As long as you keep getting in trouble, I have to interfere. I have to protect you." his eyes turned to the ground. "It's because you never say anything back to them that they keep trying to pick on you."

"They aren't lying though Syaoran. You never play with anyone but me."

"Well then stop playing with me if you're scared." he sneered.

Sakura shook her head. "I don't want to! I like playing with Syaoran!"

Syaoran looked up at her sudden outburst. Her determined eyes made him uncomfortable. "Whatever…" he replied with an airy voice. "Do what you want."

"Hai!" Sakura smiled. "But maybe…you could be nice to Tomoyo-chan? She likes you." she said as a- matter-of-fact.

"She scares me. All those girls scare me."

"Is that why you always act so mean to them?"

"It's the only way to get rid of them…"

As they walked home, side by side, Sakura forgot all about wanting to hide in her room. Syaoran did that to her. She knew she was lucky to have someone like him.

_In fact, I wanted to tell him that day that Tomoyo-chan wasn't the only one who liked him. _

* * *

_**Present**_

"Stupid…stupid…stupid…" I repeated after myself. As I walked home, I was thankful that the night kept my face hidden from strangers. After announcing everything to Eriol and seeing his reaction, my tears hadn't been able to stop. He hadn't known who I was. He wasn't Syaoran. "Stupid…stupid…stupid." I hit my fist into my other hand, keeping in time with my words.

I was quite confused at this point. Syaoran had amnesia, meaning Eriol still had the possibility of being him. I just needed to give him the time to remember, right? Despite what happened, I still wanted to believe in this.

As I neared my house, I turned the other corner and arrived at the small garden court where I had spent many times just sitting on the swing, under the cherry blossom tree. I needed my tears to stop flowing before I went home or else Touya would've caused an uproar.

The garden square wasn't empty and I felt discouraged. In the middle of the court, a young man was sitting on the paved ground, lying against a large water fountain. I couldn't see his face in the darkness, but I was glad because that meant he wouldn't have been able to see mine. Quietly, I made my way to the swing and sat myself down.

The man by the fountain didn't stir, just remained in his position. One leg straight, one leg bent, with both hands propped on his knee. He cradled his face in his arms. I thought he was asleep.

He looked worn out. His shirt was white and everything else was dark. It comforted me to see that other people came here to think.

Sighing, I swung silently. I flinched when I saw that my movement stirred the man's attention. Slightly, showing almost no movement, his face tilted upwards, revealing a dark eye.

I stopped swinging, wondering if he could see me in the darkness. I went to wipe my tears just in case he could. I couldn't however, hold in a gasp as the figure pushed himself up. He was extremely tall, his shirt blew in the wind, revealing his messily done up buttons which were slightly unmatched to the holes.

Silently, he began to move. Move towards me. His movements were slow and almost wobbly. When he was just a few feet away, I tried looking up at him, but his face was completely hidden.

I wanted to run in fear and even started to get up.

"Here. Stop crying."

The raspy voice made me stop and I looked at what he offered. My heart hurt when I saw what it was.

A simple unadorned piece of cloth, neatly folded into a square. The back of my eyes were getting warm all over again.

Sniffling, I took it from the man's steady hand. "Thank you." I whispered.

I could see that he was looking down at me, almost as if he was trying to study my face. He remained silent for a moment and watched as I tried to stop more tears from coming out. His kindness made me wonder if he had been able to see my face from where he had been sitting. I didn't know any other reason to how he could have known I was crying.

I should have been scared of a complete stranger, but I couldn't imagine him doing anything to me now that we had shared such a brief exchange of words.

"I c-can't hic see your face…" I whispered. "I'm sorry for-sniff w-waking you."

"Do…" the voice hesitated, "you come here often?" his hoarse voice made me wonder if he too had been crying, but his words made it seem like he didn't know anyone else who did come here.

"Yes." I sniffed pathetically. "Because of t-the cherry blossom trees." I swallowed.

_Stop being so nice even under these circumstances…you have no idea what a horrible person I am. Eriol isn't the one I've been searching for. He doesn't remember me. And I made Li angry, and all along he had just been trying to warn me of the outcome…his headaches are because of me. I think it's because I wanted to be with Eriol that I wanted to believe he was Syaoran. _

_Stop being so nice to a stranger. I don't deserve it._

I was beginning to think, at that point, that those girls had been right. I was just a greedy person. I had Syaoran then and without him, I wanted Eriol.

My mouth began to sputter nonsense. "Asking f-for e-even more happiness i-is wrong sniff Asking f-for so much…it's-"

"Is that…what you want? More happiness?" his quiet voice made me look to the ground in guilt.

I couldn't answer him. The answer would have been 'yes' of course it was. I wanted Syaoran back…I wanted him back so much.

"Sakura…"

My eyes widened as he said my name. He was referring to the flowers, but I still looked up. My heart stopped as for a moment the moon's rays framed the kind man's face.

The moonlight on Li's face.

He was gazing at the cherry blossoms, now almost in full bloom. A forlorn look played on his expressions. He was tall, but until now, I hadn't noticed that he had a habit of slouching slightly. Almost like he was carrying an invisible pain, unseen by those around him. Never had I seen him look so vulnerable. But the moment passed in a flash and his face was once again hidden by night.

My fingers tightened around the rope of the string. Was he here because of me? I clutched the cloth to my chest.

"A-are you…okay? You sniff s-sound sad."

"Yes." he answered almost immediately. "I'm like you. I want more."

My throat caught. "T…that isn't too much?"

"No." his husky voice said. "It's not too much."

"B-but why?" I raised my voice, slightly.

"Because it just isn't."

I didn't understand what he was saying.

He moved closer. "If you give up…that means you never wanted it in the first place. Wanting happiness, finding happiness. They're different."

I remained silent. The words that were coming from Li were oddly special. Words that I wanted to live by.

"You're crying." he stated. "Something must have happened to you…do you still think you deserve to be happier?"

"I-I don't know.'

"What do you want?" his voice was patient, but still strangled as if every word spoken hurt him. I wanted to know if he came here frequently. My opinion of him was starting to change.

I didn't answer for a moment, forcing my tears back down. Looking at the ground I answered truthfully. "I-I want Syoaran."

* * *

To be continued…

* * *

Okay, out of this whole story I just have to admit, I disliked writing part 2 the most. Sad scenes aren't really my thing and I didn't really like how Li just approached Sakura without knowing who he was comforting. It seemed out of character, but I didn't really know how else to get them to talk. Plus, the night hid their faces and I wanted to make sure they couldn't see each other for my own purposes...HUH...well leave a comment and tell me how you felt about it. 

This is as sad and sappy as it's basically going to get because I gotta make Sakura realize who Li is sooner or later...(sigh) I like their arguments though. Who knows, maybe more obstacles will arise in their future...MUAHAHAHA. Thanks for the reviews!

**Ps.** I was thinking of setting up a system of updating every saturdays, but I realized that might not work with all the homework I have that piles up. Maybe every 3-4 days, how about that? That's about the time it took from the last update to this one.

-silent wanderer


	3. Chapter 3

Good Morning! erm...well at least it's morning now. o.o So how is everyone doing? I'm fine thank you!

(Eriol comes over: I don't think anyone asked...)

Uhh, so what did I want to say...let's see...another flaw in my story huh? I know Sakura was Syaoran's best friend, but he kept a lot of stuff hidden from her. (You'll learn why later) As a kid, he wasn't supposed to have any friends, or at least his parents told him not to make any close relationships. It's only later when he is older that he starts using the name Li.** (It'll all be explained. Because this was written from Sakura's view point, I can't reveal everything to the reader because she herself shouldn't know the answer to everything regarding Syaoran.)**

Hmm...Oh yes! Second, an apology to all those people out there who actually study Japanese history and read what I made up in the last chapter. How accurate was I? That's what I'd like to know! I just went to a random (professional looking) site and absorbed some info and transferred it to my story with a few twists. (BOWS to people offended) Other than that I really don't know much of Japanese history. I'm sad like that, yes...Anyways, sorry for that and now it's time to give out my thanks!

(these are those that reviewed for chapt 2, I didn't forget anyone did I?)

karincherry: hi karincherry, I hope I answered your first question above. . in regards to the quote "Maybe I am not the one who loves you the most, but you are the one I love the deepest, with all my heart." hmm...(scratches head) how to explain..."Maybe I am not the one who loves you the most" refers to the idea that of all the people who do love you, I may not be able to compare with the love someone else can offer you, "but you are the one I love the deepest with all my heart" shows that regardless of how much more someone else may love you, I love you with my own capacity and although it may not match to another person's love, it is as much love as my own being can provide. Does that make sense? When I first read the quote I thought the same thing you did, but I found the quote like this and I wondered if I was missing something. I derived the meaning on my own so it may be wrong. Meh, hahaha (Trust me, you may be right too!) Thanks for letting me know what I had to clear up! I like it when reviewers point stuff like that out! .

Sakura Li 2389: It's great that you brought up the fact that Sakura could've just mentioned Syaoran's name because I was thinking about that when I was writing.Then I went to thinking that I wanted to make things more interesting and keep Li in the dark...And YES! he knows she's looking for Syaoran but he doesn't want to totally reveal who he is until a little later...it isn't as long as I intended for him to wait, but let's chock it up to him being to excited that he found someone important from his past. Wow, you're good at this guessing the plot thing! . (heh, eriol did seem to be a little too knowing didn't he? I'll explain that later on in the story...eriol will explain himself.)

a little someone: WOOH! Enjoy this chapter! More for you right? haha

Wite AnEjUl oV hElL: haha, I don't know what's wrong with me, but I wanted to make Li kind've eccentric. Did it work? I'm really scared in writing his character because I want to keep his personality intact...IT's So HaRd! Sometimes, he's too cruel for his own good...but, yeah was it really emotional? Awe, I'd hug you for saying that if I could!

kimtarboi622: And what do you know? They do get together in this chapter! I'm telling you, everyone is so good in guessing what's going to happen next!

Light in the Darkness: oh, light in the darkness, I just love your reviews! I'll update quicker! I will! And yes, I don't want to drag this on very much, so he better start remembering a few things soon! Amnesia, smanesia!...heh

Majah: Yeah, I'm sort of bad at ending my chapters...they always seem to end like that. I hope Li's reaction is a good one for you. ARGH! It's so hard to keep him in character...I swear I still don't know what it is! Anyways, please enjoy this chappie. .

youkaigirl64: My motto, you can never say thanks enough! (or sorry, but Li seems to think otherwise huh?) Anyways, haha thank you for leaving a review and enjoy!

Christine: Okay wow! That's good. Syaoran is supposed to be a kind person. I'm glad you were able to see that and I hope everyone else does. He's not just a mean cocky creep, he really isn't! (Li butts in: Damn right I'm not!) But everyone seemed okay with him comforting Sakura so it turned out fine I think. I hope this chapter is better than the last! Thanks so much and I'll shut up to let you read now haha.

the nadja: Haha I loved making Li say he had headaches whenever he saw Sakura's face! But yes I was trying to hint to everyone who he really was and that's why I got Eriol to explain some background info of him to Sakura. Did it work? Or did I just manage to make Li look like a kid with mental problems? haha Thanks for taking the time to read!

sakuraluv24: That is SO true. Here Li thinks Sakura was just chasing after his friend, _Eriol-kun, _but he realizes she thought he was someone else...Syaoran in fact, and to top it off, him! (as that is his name) I tried to mix together the emotion of surprise and anger together in his reaction and ended up with angprise! haha I'm lame, I know...but you're right, I didn't make him recall her immediately. Like how predicatble would that be? haha . So I hope I'll be able to clear things up as this story goes on and about the history assignment...I hope it wasn't too farfetched. (and I would like to include other characters in the story...probably Tomoyo.) Thanks!

You guys are so great!

* * *

**Part III**

"What do you want?" his voice was patient, but still strangled as if every word spoken hurt him. I wanted to know if he came here frequently. My opinion of him was starting to change.

I didn't answer for a moment, forcing my tears back down. Looking at the ground I answered truthfully. "I-I want Syoaran."

* * *

I watched as his body froze. I looked up and tried to make out his expression. The tension grew thick as the only sound was from the rustle of cherry blossoms. 

Then, finally "W-what did you say?"

I shook my head thoughtfully. For a moment, I almost thought he knew someone named Syaoran. That he knew my Syaoran. My heart crashed hard against my ribs. "Syaoran. To be happy…I want to see Syaoran." I shook my head. "Sorry. I'm just saying things."

"You…who are you?"

His voice was beginning to lose it's kindness and once again, I was reminded of who I was with. "I'm sorry, I can't stay." I got up from the swing, and took a few steps away from Li, until I was completely out of his reach. "I'm sorry, I didn't listen to you earlier…Li-san. You were right. Eriol-kun wasn't Syaoran."

_I gave a small wave even though I knew he wouldn't be able to see me. This was the last time I would ever see him. Eriol wasn't Syaoran._

* * *

During lunch period the next day, I felt sick to my stomach. I didn't catch colds easily, but I couldn't stop sniffling the whole day. I desperately wanted the day to end. 

Other than that, things went back to normal. I was invisible again. I suppose I should have felt lonely, but I was in a way happy. Before all this, I never had a reason to cry. I spent my days admiring Eriol and wishing to once again be reunited with him. I realized then that the hope I had back then had been enough. It kept me going day after day. I went to school, looking forward to catch a glimpse of Eriol, angry that Li was always at his side.

It wasn't my place to enter their lives. Even if Eriol was Syaoran, I had no right to re-enter his life just because I wanted to. Wherever he was now, he knew nothing of the past we had spent together. I wasn't going to give up on Syaoran. I just wanted him to know that if we ever did encounter each other, I wouldn't force myself into his life.

_What I really wanted wasn't Syaoran to be in my life again. What I really wanted was to see Syaoran happy; to see if he was still that sad child from so long ago._

Li said he wanted happiness. I hoped he found it because I could now relate to Eriol. He was like me. Both of us wanted our friends to be happy. Li was right. Wanting to be happier than you already were shouldn't be wrong.

* * *

I walked home with a smile on my face that day. I was incredibly sick, but nevertheless I was content. However, the only disturbing thing was the fact that in history class that day, my book had appeared on my desk and no one had said a word to me about last day's events. The whole thing was oddly comforting as if the whole incident hadn't occurred.

* * *

I sneezed as I shut my locker. 

"Now you're sick? Who knew one night outside would be that harmful."

I was more than surprised when I looked up and saw none other than Li. Since that day, I hadn't seen him within ten feet of me. His sudden outburst made my mind fly to that horrible night. "W-what do you want?" I asked, wanting to sound indifferent. Instead, it came out in a hostile tone.

He narrowed his eyes in distaste. "You sure know how to ruin a mood. I come here out of character to ask if you're okay, and this is how I'm treated?"

He was up to something. He was definitely up to something. I could tell that easily enough. "About the other night…" I started, carefully. "I told you who I was searching for. I thought Syaoran was Eriol-kun, but now… you seem to know something."

He was silent for a moment. "Who is he?"

"Who?" he was looking at my in a studious way, as if reading something from my face. It took a second for me to realize he meant Syaoran. "He was my friend."

"Must have been a hell of a friend, if you want to look for him even now." he seemed to think I had a second motive to finding Syaoran and that unnerved me. What I didn't understand was why he was suddenly so interested. He was pounding me for answers and it was supposed to be the other way around.

"He meant a lot to me." I wouldn't stand there and let him bad mouth Syaoran. "What's your point?" he kept looking down at me with such deep concentration that I was starting to turn red.

"Sick people shouldn't get all bothered like that. How do you expect to get better?"

I ignored him, unable to hear slight worry in his tone. "It seemed like you recognized the name-"

Li however, didn't seem to want to be pulled into a bad mood again and interrupted me. "Not only are you entirely clueless, but talking to you just caused my I.Q to drop a few notches. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm leaving." he grinned at me. "You won't do too good for my image. Look, people are starting to stare."

I flushed, realizing he was telling the truth. "Wait! So Eriol-kun isn't…"

"Nope, he's plain, old, lame _Eriol-kun._" he was walking off, holding onto the syllables in Eriol's name as he always did when mimicking me.

"But you know something don't you?" I called, hoping he would answer.

He hesitated slightly in his gait. In a harsh whisper that I could barely make out, he said "You're voice…I wonder why I didn't recognize it that night. Gives me a damn headache."

* * *

A few days passed and my cold wasn't getting any better. On Saturday, I was glad to get out of school early. I had the rest of the weekend to get better and as soon as I imagined myself under the warm bed covers after a hot, steamy bath, I started to feel better. 

Not once did I see Li. He must have been trying to forget about everything that had happened. I couldn't blame him. I had just barged into his life.

Sneezing, I quickly turned the corner and ran to the gate of my house.

My breath caught as I opened it to reveal a face I thought I would never have to see again.

Li pushed himself off a large boulder in the backyard, placing his hands in his pocket. An awkward look was in his eye.

"Li-san…" I trailed.

"I let myself in from the back gate."

I didn't move. How had he known that I would come in from the back gate? Even if he let himself in from the back, wouldn't any sane person go wait in the front? "H-how long have you been here?"

He shrugged. "Just came."

His eyes were hard and unreadable. I sniffled despite myself. "I haven't seen you around. I wanted to say thanks for returning my book the last time."

"Yeah…" he looked at the ground. "No one's been bothering you about that day, have they?"

I was surprised by his concern. So much that I was speechless for a moment. However, I had a feeling that it had been him who had stopped all the rumours all along. "No. No one." I closed the gate behind me. "How do you know where I live?"

"Your house is close to my old-" he cut himself off. "It's close to Eriol's."

I frowned, wondering if whether that was a good enough answer for my question. I knew where Eriol lived and in reality, it was on the other side of the garden square. Still, I didn't question him further.

"Is that what you wanted to say? To make sure I got my book back?" I noticed then that not only was Li's behaviour slightly off, but he had a certain flush to his skin tone. It made him look almost…happy. Did that mean he found his happiness?

"I need to tell you something."

"Oh?" I waited patiently to continue, hoping he would hurry up because I really wanted that warm bath.

He hesitated and I realized this was the first time I had ever seen him so flustered.

"What is it?"

"Your happiness…" he began.

I looked up at him, intently.

He looked at me with determined eyes. "Did you ever find him?"

"I-no. Not yet." I smiled. "You found something that makes you happy?"

He gave a slight nod.

My heart jumped and I took a step closer towards him. "That's really great! What was it?" I leaned in so he could tell me.

_That day he had appeared so distressed that seeing him happy was almost comforting._

Before I knew what was happening, Li's arms went around me. My cheek made a soft thud against his uniform as his arms clasped me tightly. I couldn't move, but my face burned.

"You must be happy. When I first saw you, you looked very happy." I babbled. "But you don't have to thank me. I didn't do anything."

"I'm not thanking you."

My face grew even hotter. "W-what do you mean?"

"Sakura."

Something felt like it was tugging at my heart. Li's arms pulled me even closer to him.

"Sakura. I'm sorry. I didn't remember you."

"W-what are you talking about?" I whispered. I shook my head against him.

"Our last conversation made me think. I couldn't stop thinking about what you said regarding...Syaoran." He released me and took a step back. "You never knew my last name?"

"I still don't know your last name." I replied. I'd never seen Li this excited.

"You don't know my first name. Li's my last name."

I cocked my head. "No one ever called you anything different. I thought only Eriol knew your first name."

Li scoffed. "I didn't think he was the only one."

"Hey, what are you talking about?"

He rolled his eyes. "You're clueless you know that?"

"I don't need to hear that from you…" I mumbled silently. He had said that the last time too.

"What? What did you say?" he stopped for a moment. "You've changed a lot you know."

His words hit me then. I looked up at him, eyes wide. "Your first name…what is it?"

He rolled his eyes. "You need me to tell you that? I'm starting to question whether we were real friends or not."

"It's…"

He smiled a warm smile. It caused my heart to slam against my chest. "Syaoran."

I couldn't speak for a time. "You can't be…liar, you can't be…"

His face fell. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? You snotty brat! If you can't recognize me…" he stopped as he must've seen my tears well up. Slowly, he came towards me.

"Sakura, I haven't changed that much have I? You said you were searching for me."

I took a step away from him. "No, you're lying. You can't be him. Syaoran wasn't like you. You're not him. Stop lying."

He advanced towards me, but I quickly retreated until my hand was back on the gate, ready to dash away if he took another step.

He continued towards me and my hand went into a fist. I avoided his hand and before I knew what was happening, my hand shot out and punched Li on his jaw.

He froze. An odd look came over his face as he stopped moving towards me. His voice returned to the way it sounded that night at the garden. "You're really going to let me run you out of your own yard?"

I remained silent.

He gave a scoff. "Damn it, my head's starting to hurt again." his fists tightened. "You reminded me of someone. Maybe I…maybe I'm wrong. You don't recognize me…what the hell am I missing?" He looked up at me, shooting daggers. "Tell me why I was so happy when I heard you say you were looking for Syaoran." His eyes flashed dangerously. "Tell me why your name makes me sick to my stomach?" his questions were like demands.

I hesitated and debated whether I should have ran at that moment. My hand hurt from the impact of his jaw. However, all I could ask was "Your name really is Syaoran?"

"Damn it! I told you it was." He gave me one more withering look before turning away. "Waste of time…"

He left me standing alone, while he went out the front gate.

_I didn't believe he was Syaoran. It couldn't have been him. But he had held me in such a warm embrace that thinking back to it, my heart wanted to cry._

* * *

It turned out that the hot bath didn't actually help me at all. In fact, for all of the next week, I had to force myself to get up and attend school. Dad wasn't around much, but I had begun to think that Touya was suspicious of why I was ignoring him. I was glad that we hardly ate meals together because of his university courses taking up most of his time. Usually, I just prepared dinner for when he came home. Except, I didn't know how long I would have until Touya found out that I was sick. I didn't have time to stay at home and get better either, so the cold seemed only to get worse. 

I hated the idea of catching up on homework and I was pretty sure that my cold wasn't all that bad yet. All I needed was some long rest and that would be easily accomplished, as spring break was coming up in a few days. I just had to be careful that I didn't give my sickness to anyone else.

I suppose you're all wondering why I'm ignoring the topic of… Li. Ever since that week ago, I've seen him a few times in the halls. He seemed happy enough. In fact, he seemed quite happy during the times I saw him. It made me think that he really did find his happiness. He had probably made a mistake in thinking it was me.

A part of me had wanted to believe him. His name was also Syaoran? It just didn't make sense. It couldn't have been a coincidence, but he just left after I called him a liar...after I had physically punched him. Syaoran wouldn't have given up that easily, would he have? I couldn't however, deny the fact that he was looking for someone. The question he asked me was still fresh in my head.

_Tell me why I was so happy when I heard you say you were looking for Syaoran?_

I wonder why he had thought I was his happiness, although he seemed to have already forgotten about the whole thing. At times, I wanted to approach him and ask him what was making him smile that warmly, but my guilt would always stop me. I still hadn't spoken to Eriol since that day and I went out of my way to stay out of his when I did catch glimpse of him.

There really isn't much else to say, besides that I had been going back to the garden square to just think. Never was Li there. The rumours about my creative writing skills were still lying dormant and I was wondering when someone would say something about it towards me. It almost made me smile to think Li had helped me with that.

It really was the end of my journey. After everything that had happened, I had nothing to show for it.

As I gathered my books, I started to make my way out of the school, but stopped when I heard familiar voices from the courtyard.

"Syaoran is a really nice name. I never knew that was your first name. It suits you."

The name tugged at my heart strings and I realized that Li was having a conversation with another girl. Why did he have to share the same name as my Syaoran?

"Syaoran-kun? Could I ask you-"

"Stop it."

"Wha- Syaoran-kun?…"

I wanted to leave, but my feet wouldn't allow it. I couldn't see them, but I could hear.

"Don't call me that." his voice was so cold that it made me frown at the way he was treating the girl.

"But why not? It's your name. Syaoran-kun, I wanted to tell you that I like you. I really like you."

I heard a small sigh.

"I told you to stop it. My name's Li. If you don't have anything better to say, I'm leaving."

At this point, he must have rose and started walking away because the next thing I heard was "Wait!" then a slight gasp.

I thought the girl had probably just latched herself onto Li and was given one of his death glares.

"Let me go. I don't want to have to say it again. I'm not interested ."

I heard a small sound that sounded like a whimper and then the next thing I knew Li was brushing past me. I'm not sure if he saw me, but again my chest felt constricted. I was unable to deny it this time. Li had said what only one person would ever cruelly say.

What only Syaoran would say.

So many times he had reminded me of Syaoran.

Without another thought I ran to catch up with him.

_Why had I been so blind? What did it matter that Li was nothing like the Syaoran I once knew? That didn't give me the right to reject him. _

_He…he has to be Syaoran._

* * *

_**Past**_

"I've never seen your house before Syaoran. I think it'll be fun."

Syaoran didn't say anything.

"Do you have any brothers or sisters? Probably not…"

Syaoran gave her a careful look. "How do you know that?"

"Because Syaoran always seems to be so…" Sakura trailed off. "Are we getting close?"

Syaoran took Sakura's hand in his. "Hey, I don't want to go home yet. Lets go play in the park." he yanked on her hand.

"But, I want to see your house." Sakura yanked back.

"Why? Don't you like the flowers in the garden square? I don't have any flowers at my house. Stop pulling!"

"I'm not." she answered in a strained voice. "I've never met your mommy or daddy either. I want to see Syaoran's family."

"There's no one to say hi to. The house is boring. Besides, you'll probably just get lost. Come to the park and we'll play hide and seek if you want."

Sakura shook her head, trying to pull her hand from his grasp. "I won't get lost, you'll be with me." she stopped suddenly as realization struck. "Lost? Do you have a really big house Syaoran? We can play hide and seek there!"

Syaoran groaned at his big mouth. "Fine. You go then." He dropped Sakura's hand without feeling. "I'm leaving."

Sakura watched Syaoran walk off in the other direction and half expected him to come back so they could go to his house together. He didn't even look back once.

"Syaoran!"

He still continued and soon she could see his form disappearing behind the corner. Relenting, Sakura ran after him.

"Syaoran?" she bounded the corner, but he wasn't in sight. "Syaoran? Come out, I don't want to play hide and seek now. Are you mad? Syoaran!" Sakura felt guilty now at pulling on Syaoran's hand. "Syaoran! I'm sorry! I won't force you to do anything again!"

Out of nowhere, Syaoran flew down and landed beside Sakura. A look of superior suspicion dancing in his eyes. "You always do that."

Sakura jumped as she spun around to face the voice. Looking up, she saw a large tree that Syaoran had jumped out from. Turning her attention back at him, she grew uneasy. "Do what?"

"That sorry thing. I mean, geeze, it makes people feel guilty."

"Guilty?"

"Yeah, guilty." he flicked her gently on the forehead. "You say it without even thinking. Stop and think if it was actually your fault would you? I was pulling you too, stupid."

Sakura didn't say anything and Syaoran grew curious. "Hey, if you start crying, we better go somewhere else. If Touya sees you…" Syaoran cringed at the possibilities. "I'll get in trouble."

Sakura shook her head, careful with her words. "I don't think sorry is a bad word."

"It's not…it just is when it comes from you. Anyways, who cares, stop thinking about it. The world needs people like you to balance out people like me."

Sakura followed Syaoran to the garden square park. "Syaoran?"

"What now?" he eyed the swing. "You got the swing last time. This time I get it, got it?"

"No, not that. I wanted to tell you that I like you Syaoran."

Syaoran blinked, taking an awkward step away from Syaoran. "Whaa…what are you talking about?"

"I like you." she said simply. "And I want you to be happy."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Syaoran looked to the ground.

"I get sad when I'm lonely sometimes. I know you don't want me playing at your house, but if you feel lonely like me sometimes." Sakura smiled warmly. "I can come visit you like you visit me. When Syaoran is happy…it makes me happy."

Syaoran tried to open his mouth then, to tell his friend why he didn't want her over. But before he had a chance, the serious Sakura changed back into her happy self. She ran to the swing.

"Hey, get off that! I always push you. Let me on!"

Sakura just laughed. "Syaoran, you're hair matches the cherry blossoms."

Touching his hair, Syaoran blushed. Earlier today, he had let Sakura dye his hair pink.

The warm, happy colour of Sakura.

He loved that colour.

Syaoran supposed Sakura could have the swing if it was just today…

* * *

_**Present**_

"Li-san!" I half expected him to be up in a tree by the time I ran to the bus curb. I waited until he noticed me and stopped.

The surprise on his face was there and I didn't know how to take it. If he was Syaoran, I just wanted him to have the happiness that would make me happy.

Out of breath, I looked up at him. "I know it's wrong of me after what I said, but please, if you really are Syaoran…could I ask you a few questions?"

"What?" his voice was hostile. "What questions?"

"I mean, why weren't you ever able to recall who I-" I stopped. _No, that's not what I wanted to say_. _I couldn't cause him anymore headaches. I could only make sure he continued to smile_. Sighing, I asked, "Did you know someone named Sakura?

He swallowed. "How many times do I have to say it? I don't know! Damn, leave me alone." he sighed and lifted his hand to his temple. "One after another..." he growled.

I blushed despite myself. "You said you found your happiness that day. Why?"

Li looked down at me. "Why?" he repeated.

I had to tilt my head back quite far in order to look right into his eyes. "You were happy…at seeing me?"

His eyes narrowed. "I thought you were the person I grew up with. I was wrong."

I shook my head at that. "No! I am Sakura. Sakura Kinomoto!"

"Kinomoto…" he echoed as if the familiarity was starting to set in.

His distance made me wince. I was hurting him.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to tell you who I was. I don't want to see you unhappy, but at first I couldn't believe that you were Syaoran. I know I was just trying to block you out and it was wrong. You can be angry if you want. I understand. I really didn't mean to hit you."

"You…" he started, with a tone in his voice I couldn't make out. "Why now? You probably still don't know if I really am this person you're searching for. What is this? Wishful thinking? Just because you ruined it with Eriol doesn't mean I should be next in line."

His words stung like nothing I had ever felt. This was Syaoran…never in my life had I heard such words directed at me and by the one who had protected me. It hurt to think that before I'd even known he was Syaoran, he had already made a habit of treating me like that. "This is how Tomoyo-chan must have felt…" I didn't want to cry in front of Syaoran. Not when I knew he would just laugh.

I swallowed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you think that. I-I just wanted to tell you who I was. I felt like I owed that to you for causing you to remember me."

Syaoran remained immobile. Yet he continued to look down at me in a solemn way. I wondered if he thought I was lying to him. I didn't blame him. When he told me who he was, I must have done the same thing. I had rejected him.

I bit my lip and turned around so I could hide my emotional face. "Li-san. I told you once that I wanted you to be happy. Because whenever you used to smile, it made happy. Nothing's changed." I ran without looking back. In my heart, I was glad that I got out what I wanted to say.

It was quite a while until I allowed myself to slow down. I felt like swooning. I suppose I might have been more sick than I originally thought. My legs wanted to give out right at that moment.

_But as I slowed my pace back down to a stumble, a pair of warm arms embraced me in a familiar clasp._

My eyes widened at the contact and I dropped my bag as I crashed into something hard. The person's warmth smothered me.

"Damn...If you want me to be happy, don't move."

I was speechless as I stood there on the street, unable to have moved if earth itself were ending. He had ran after me. The idea left me in amazement. He had chased after me?

I wanted to bring my hands to my face and cover it, but his embrace locked my arms to my side. My tears came out without warning and wouldn't stop.

_The funny part was that I had never been so happy in my entire life._

"I don't know who you are, but seeing you're face...it has to be you."

He loosened his embrace and gently spun me around to face him. I brought the back of my hand to my face, rubbing away my tears. I couldn't see his expression, but I was surprised to feel his lips brush against the crown of my head. I wanted to bury my head against the ruffles of his uniform.

He didn't ask me to stop crying, just continued to comfort me.

_It was then, I think that my feelings for Syaoran changed into something else._

* * *

Finally, Li slowly released me from his grasp, gently prying my hands from my face. I began to protest, turning from him quickly, in order to take off my glasses and rub the redness from my eyes. 

"I'm sorry, I still have that handkerchief you gave me. I'll return it to you tomorrow." I wiped my eyes with my right sleeve.

"I don't need it. You keep it." He gently forced me to face him, placing a finger under my chin and lifting my entire face to meet his thoughtful gaze. "You look more familiar without those glasses of yours."

"I don't look familiar with them?" I was too shocked by his soft tone that I didn't know whether to feel offended.

His eyes looked pained. "I'm sorry. I didn't know. "

A quiet sob choked its way out of my throat. "I don't think…I've ever heard you say 'sorry' before."

He gave a small smile. "I never had to." his hand went to the back of my head, pushing me back to his chest. "I'm so sorry." he said in a raspy voice.

I moved closer to him. I couldn't believe I had found Syaoran. "I didn't recognize you. I always thought Eriol was…" my voice trailed. His heat was making me light headed. "I'm sorry."

"No." he answered forcefully. "Eriol isn't. Forget about him. "

_I felt so hot._

"If you still like him, I won't try to get in your way anymore. But,"

_I clung to Li as the streets and the cars began to swirl._

"Even after I treated you like I did, would you stay- Sakura?"

_Someone was shaking me, calling my name._

"Sakura! Sakura!"

* * *

When I woke, I found myself on a warm bed. Taking a deep breath, I realized the covers smelt different. I forced my eyes open and saw that I was enveloped in the darkness. Even then, I could sense that this wasn't my room. 

As I stopped to gather my thoughts, the door opened and I was startled to see Li enter the room with a small bowl of water. A small face towel hung from the edge of the bowl. What made me turn red however, was the fact that his white shirt was left opened for the world to see his stomach. I had to force myself to look away.

"Good, you're awake."

I looked around the room, feeling oddly at ease. "This is your house Li-san?"

He frowned as he took a seat at the edge of the bed. "Yes, and stop calling me that…it's creepy."

I looked at him as he dipped the towel into the bowl, most of his torso covered now because of his position. "You told me you liked being called that."

His answer was awkward. "That was before I-just stop it. I don't like it." He compressed out the excess water, and ordered me to lay back down.

Doing just that, I said "It's hard for me to change now. It's been so long since I used Syaoran." I stopped to take everything in. "I can't believe it's really you. I can't believe it." I was still in shock, unable to smile though I wanted to. It was all I wanted to do.

He was quiet for a time as he pressed the cloth to my forehead. It's warmth made me snuggle deeper into the bed. He must have decided not to say anything regarding my comment.

"Is this your bed?"

"Maybe." He placed the small bowl on the small dresser.

"Li-" I corrected myself "Syaoran…"

He relented. "Yes."

As if he knew what my actions were going to be, he placed his hand on my shoulder to stop me from getting up.

"It's okay. I took you to my house. You can use my bed. I want you to."

I allowed myself to stay on the bed, but was aware of the fact that I couldn't relax. I didn't understand why my heart hurt so much as I looked at Li. In the dark, I noticed that he looked like he had just come out of the shower. His hair appeared to be slightly wet.

"You're shirt's not buttoned." I mumbled.

"My shir-" he looked down and shrugged. "You've seen worse of me." he leaned in so he could lower his voice. "You've even seen me naked a few times, haven't you Sakura?"

I blushed, though I could not deny his claims. "We were kids." I argued, covering my face to not only hide my blush, but to keep him safe from my germs. I 'shooed' him away with one free hand. In the back of my mind, I wanted to smile at the idea that he had recalled a memory. "You're going to catch what I have." It sounded odd for Li to call me by my name. He usually just settled for You there! Brat! or Dummy!

He sat back up. "That's not good. You better get well. Don't you want to spend time with me?"

I bolted up immediately. "I do! I really do!"

He blinked in surprise.

Flustered, I picked up the small towel that fell from my face the moment I had sat up.

After the lapse of astonishment left his face, Li took the face towel from my hands and dipped it back in the bowl. "Stop making sudden movements if you want to get better faster." his voice held irritation, but I noticed something else in his tone too. He gave me a short glance from the corner of his eyes. "The water's cold, I'll be right back."

But as he started to stand, my hand grew a mind of it's own, tugging on his shirt sleeve. He turned to me in what I thought was worry.

"It's okay, I'm fine. Could you stay with me? Until I fall back asleep? You can leave when I do."

He didn't seem to know how to answer for a second, but nodding, Li sat back down on the bed. "Fine, hurry up. Sleep."

I smiled. "Could I hold your hand?"

"What?" he couldn't hide his embarrassment this time. "Why?"

"You used to hold my hand when I was sick. It made me happy." I held out my hand, in a weak gesture. My head was pounding and I sniffled.

Li looked aggrieved as he laced his hand into mine. "I-I still can't remember some things."

I just looked at him. "Does being with me make your head hurt?"

I felt slightly guilty and hurt when he didn't answer me.

"Go to bed. I'll be here."

I nodded, too tired to question him further.

My eyes closed soon after.

* * *

_After all this time, I finally found Syaoran. I hope everything remains like this. And even if he can't recall our past, I'm sure we'll make new memories in the future._

_To be continued…_

* * *

Yay! They're together now! I like happy moments, don't you? I hope I didn't rush things though. It was believable that Sakura recalled Syaoran after he rejected that girl right? Maybe, there was a connection! Oh Syaoran, remember everything soon for Sakura won't you? 

(Syaoran pulls Sakura in a warm hug: Hey! This is a relationship in the making. Give me some time to win her over!)

-silent wanderer


	4. Chapter 4

Hello, hello. Yes, well...School is hard neh? So many exams! Well I'm going to go finish my homework before violin. Thanks for your support and don't forget to leave a review for this little writer. .

P.s I had no idea that writers weren't allowed to answer any questions in the author's note...hehe oops! bad me...so yes yes, no more doing that. Just know I would if I could. (Thanks for pointing it out Majah! heh, I'm so oblivious.)

**_Stray Memories_**

**Part IV**

"What the hell are you doing? Go back to bed!" Li ran out the bedroom door, shutting it in my face.

Picking up my bag, I pulled at the doorknob. Unfortunately, he was still pushing. "Let me out! I have to go to school. I can't miss classes. I can rest when I get back home. Li-san!"

He growled behind the door. "Shut up! Stop calling me that!" he made a soft grunt as he pushed back against me, closing shut the door. "Go to bed."

I shook my head, though he was unable to see. Turning the knob, I pushed as hard as I could. The door still wouldn't budge. Li's weight must have been pushed against it.

"You're just going to hurt yourself. Go to bed. You can go to school when you feel better." he sighed. "Brat…this is how you treat people who actually take the time to care?"

"I feel fine." I called from behind the door. "Let me out. I still haven't phoned Touya to tell him where I was last night."

"I phoned him. " He groaned. "Stop charging against the door like that! You're going to hurt yourself!"

"But my homework. What did Touya say? He'll be suspicious."

"I'll go pick it up for you." he called from the barrier that was blocking me from freedom. "Just give me your schedule." He ignored the latter question regarding my brother. "This is as nice as I'm going to get, so either give me it, or I'm leaving."

"I can't. Open the door."

"No way in hell. Just slip the paper underneath the door."

I sighed and did as he asked.

"See, what are friends for. Now go back to bed. I locked the door from the outside so you can't get out. Don't try."

I didn't reply. Why did he have to keep that stubborn trait of his?

"I'm going now. If you need anything, someone will be around later to attend to you. Don't lunge at them when they open the door. Sleep well Sakura."

I clamped my lips tightly together, to resist saying goodbye. Even after what he did, it was difficult for me to stay angry.

"Aren't you going to say goodbye?"

My lips clamped tighter.

"Geeze, don't be angry Sakura. You know you need to get some rest. Fine if you don't want to say it, knock two times." it was a moment before he added "It would make me really happy."

I could hear the smirk in his voice as if he was amused. Despite myself, my hand went into a fist.

I knocked twice.

* * *

It was noon when I'd reawakened. Someone had opened the curtains and the bright light felt warm and nice as I adjusted to the brightness. Getting up from the bed, I decided I wanted to look around Li's room. I smiled mischieviously, completely understanding that I was really too nosy for my own good. 

It was so plain and empty.

A small dresser near the bed. Nothing except a small white clock on it. Curious, I went to the closet and opened the sliding door. A large walk in closet with more clothes, shoes and other accessories. I must have owned less than half of what he had in there. I closed the overwhelming closet and noticed the long white desk in the corner of the room. A few papers and a lap top. The walls were white and bare. No paintings. A blue recliner sat in the middle of the room. That was it.

I walked towards the connected bathroom and flicked on the lights. A toothbrush, a rinsing cup, a few towels and quite clean. And just as empty.

I didn't know what to expect. This was the first time I had ever seen Li's house.

The door opened then, and I half expected Li to come strolling in. Maybe that was what I hoped. Instead, a young lady in some odd uniform, came in holding a set of neatly folded garments.

She smiled when she saw me. "You must be Kinomoto-san? Your lunch is prepared for you downstairs. I'll draw a bath while you eat and here are some clothes you can change into after."

I blinked at her formality. "Please, Sakura would suffice. Who are you?" did Li actually have his own maid?

"I'm Rina."

"It's nice to meet you Rina-san. But really, you don't have to prepare the bath. I can manage myself." I took away the burden of carrying the clothes from her arms.

"No, no. You are our guest." she began to usher me out of the room. "Go ahead and eat."

"Oh…okay." I allowed myself to be pushed out and what I saw caught my breath.

Hallways and hallways of rooms. I crossed across the carpet and walked to the railing. Looking down, the floors sparkled and the glass windows shone with the sun's rays, drenching the house with a warm natural atmosphere. I walked to what was probably the main staircase and awkwardly walked down the steps. There was an elderly man at the bottom that smiled up at me.

"This way to the dining room miss."

It was just as extravagant as I thought it would be. A crystal chandelier hung from the high ceiling. The table was shorter than I expected, round in shape. I wondered whether this was their only dining room. If it wasn't for the food on the table, I would have kept examining the house. Being hungry, however, I took a seat, thanked the man profusely and immediately dug in.

_Is this why Li never took me to his house? He had said it was big, but it was also overwhelming. Where was everyone? It seemed to big for him to live by himself._

* * *

"Please. Once you change into these new clothes, you'll feel much better. Allow me to get rid of your old garments." 

The young lady from before gathered my uniform.

"No, it's okay. I still need it for school."

"But miss. They are dirty. Would you like us to clean it for you at the very least?"

I tugged at them and she tugged back. "No, really. I'll take it home and do it myself." I was currently in a bath robe. "I can't accept these clothes." and really I couldn't. The moment I had examined them, I thought they were too...different from me. A soft creamy, long sleeved knit top and a dress that was a warm chocolate. Not frilly, but pleated. Just looking at it made me feel self-conscious. It was modest and I could see that it wouldn't be too tight, but it was unnerving to picture myself in it.

The lady tugged harder at my uniform. "Master Li said to take care of everything. Please, get some more rest miss. I will be up with some tea later on."

"M-master Li?"

When I stopped tugging, she was able to untangle the clothes from my fingers. "Yes. Before he left, he instructed the whole household to make sure you were comfortable. Please, he expects you to rest." She smiled. "You seem pale. I will bring the tea up immediately." she left with my uniform.

_Master Li? _

She had said it like everyone in the household listened to him. Did that make him the head of the house? Where were his parents? It was a stupid question. They were probably at work at this time. But it was such a big house. Wasn't he ever lonely? Even being as popular as he was, Li didn't make it a habit to make friends and spend his time with others. Why?

As I decided it was better than wearing a robe, I grudgingly pulled on the clothes left for me.

I looked at his room again. Why was the room so empty? Why had he not wanted me to visit him at his house? Everyone in the household was extremely courteous and kind. So why? Why did Li have to isolate himself from the world?

As a child I hadn't thought much about it, but still I had always wondered.

_If dad hadn't introduced us that day, would Li have accepted me later on?_

* * *

_**Past**_

"Sakura? Would you like to make a new friend?"

Sakura looked up at her father. His warm eyes smiled in that fatherly way. She nodded, enjoying the sparkle in his eyes.

"See the young boy over there?"

"Standing by that man?"

"Yes." Fujitaka nodded. "He's going to go to the same school as you from now on. It's scary when you start at a new school without friends, isn't it?"

"I think so." she answered thoughtfully, studying the young boy. His eyes were a warm chestnut, but they were hesitant. He was wearing the same elementary uniform she was. But what made her smile, was his hair. It was blue. It seemed to clash with his eyes.

"Do you think you two could walk to school together? I think he would like it if Sakura showed him around."

"Okay!" Sakura replied earnestly. "Do you know him daddy?"

Fujitaka smiled at his daughter's enthusiasm. "His parents are close friends of mine. That man beside him is taking care of him, like a babysitter. But would you like to take over?"

Sakura nodded, determinedly. "I can take care of him! We can be friends."

"That's good. He doesn't like to talk much. Maybe Sakura can understand him?"

Sakura blinked and looked at the boy again. This time he raised his gaze to meet hers. Smiling, she waved. He seemed genuinely surprised and gave almost what was a slight nod of acknowledgement before looking back to the ground.

"Okay, go ahead Sakura. I know you'll make a good friend to Syaoran-kun."

"Syaoran-kun." she repeated, smiling at its sound.

She waved to her father and approached the tentative boy. "Syaoran-kun. Let's walk to school together. I'll show you around the school!. It's a nice place." she put out a hand. "We'll go together."

Something about her soft assurance made Syaoran accept her offer. He was however, too shy to take the hand she was offering. So instead, she seemed to understand his hesitation, taking it upon herself to introduce who she was.

"My name is Sakura Kinomoto."

"Sakura?"

She nodded. "Sa-ku-ra. That's right. Let's be friends, alright Syaoran-kun?"

He was surprised at her kindness. "I don't need friends." was all he could make out.

She shook her head. "It's okay. I can still be your friend."

And as they walked to school, this girl named Sakura continued to look at him with the happy mirth in her eyes. He liked her smile. She didn't care who he was or bother to ask him about things he didn't want to answer in order to fill the silence. All she did, was talk about their interests and the memories they would create not regarding her or his past, but their future.

* * *

_**Present**_

"I'm back! Sakura!" Li gave a slight sigh as practically the whole household came to greet him. It almost looked like he was blushing too, at the idea that maybe I had been bombarded like him.

"Master Li, you are back. How was your day? Would you like anything to eat?"

"No, I'm fine Rina-san. Where's Sakura?"

"She said she would like to explore the house. I saw no harm in allowing her to do so."

"She went off by herself? I thought she was supposed to be in bed"

"I didn't have the heart to lock the door on her. I'm sorry master Li." Rina smiled, giving back the key to his room. "I was about to accompany her, but she insisted to be alone. Should I have done different?"

I watched the bustle of the house through the staircase railing and was crouched down to avoid being seen.

Li looked restless. "No, it's fine. I'm going to get something to drink. Then I'll go find her."

"As you wish, master Li. Would you like me to get it for you?"

"Nah, it's fine. You should have gotten someone else to lock the door on her." he mumbled.

I could feel myself twitching at Li's words as I watched him drop his bag by the door and walk towards the kitchen.

Earlier, I had tried to go back to bed, but I was unable to sleep. I was no longer sniffling as bad as before and I was thankful that my headaches were gone. After sipping the tea, Rina-san had given me, I had asked to look around Li's house. It didn't surprise me that the house was like a mansion, but as I went around to examine each room and hallway, I could easily tell which ones were the ones that Li spent most of his time in. They were the plain, empty ones. The rest of the house were decorated with roses and other exotic flowers. Paintings covered the bare walls and were painted with warm swarthy colours other than just the ordinary white Li had in his rooms.

I lingered while inspecting those rooms because they meant more to me when they were the ones Li liked.

Moving my position so I could catch glimpse of the opening of the kitchen, I gripped the railings and continued to watch the household. There were now less people in the house than there were in the morning. Most of the cleaning was already done and the help had left.

It still amazed me that Li lived in this house. I didn't know as much about Syaoran as I thought.

"What-the-hell-are-you-doing?"

I turned my head and looked up to see an un-amused Li. "Li-san!" I stood up abruptly, guilty at spying.

He looked at me with changed eyes then. At first I wasn't aware at what he was looking at, but then I looked down at my clothes.

"It looks weird, doesn't it?"

He stared a little longer. "No. It's fine. You look nice." he gave a short smile. And I couldn't help but smile back.

_Li's smiles were rare and precious to me._

"Yay! Li-san smiled."

Li frowned, looking away. "What are you talking about. I smile all the time." he held up his bag. "Your books are making my bag heavy. And-" he eyed me. "Why are you out of bed? I told you to rest! Damn, I can't leave you alone for one second."

As I took out my books, I almost laughed. After taking out my stuff, his bag held practically nothing. "Li-san? Where are your books?"

"Huh?" he looked down at his bag. "Oh, I made Eriol carry them. I guess I forgot to get them back. Bastard probably didn't remind me on purpose." he glared at me, and grabbed my arm. "Stop changing the subject. Go to bed." he tugged me to his room.

"You and Eriol-kun are good friends aren't you?"

"Yeah, I guess. Kind of a stupid guy, but whatever, we get along fine."

_I hated to think of how he used to describe me as his friend._

"Did you have a good day at school Li-san?"

"No. It was boring and people are annoying." he dragged me into his room and tilted his head towards me. "How do you feel?"

"Very well. Everyone was really kind to me. I think I can go back to school tomorrow."

"I see." he replied, as if angry at my declaration. "Sakura?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you hear what I said to you yesterday? Before you fainted in the street?"

I stopped to think. "No, I don't think I remember. What did you say?"

He looked slightly grieved. "Nothing. I'll tell you later. Go to bed"

I shook my head. "Li-san, I think I should get back home now. I have a lot of homework to do. I'm really grateful to you though. I'm not that tired right now, so I'll take a nap if I feel like it later." I hoped all those excuses would convince him to let me go.

He sighed. "Did you get to see everything you wanted? You've never been at my house before so I don't know what kind of impression you received."

He definitely was able to read me like a book. "Li-san…I don't know why we've never played in your house before. It's very nice and big like you said."

"I told you it was big?"

"Yes, and I wanted to play hide and seek with you in it. Except we went to play in the garden square instead."

"I can't remember that." he answered curtly.

My eyes clouded. What was I doing, reminding Li of his past? Even if I wanted to confront him about why he likes to be alone so much, I had no right to ask him that. Not when I didn't know how much I meant to him. Although Li meant more to me than anything in the world, he still didn't truly know who I was. All he really knew was that I had been a childhood friend of his in the past and in some way, I had meant something to him. Until he was comfortable again, I couldn't bother him about the past or say anything to make him feel hurt.

I was still one of those people who his parents thought would bring him bad memories.

"S-sorry. Li-san, I'm going to go now okay? I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"You shouldn't walk by yourself. You're still sick."

"It's okay! I want to get better, so I can spend more time with Li-san right? Don't worry. I'll get better for sure!"

He looked at me. "You haven't changed that much have you?" he walked up to me and slowly wrapped his arms around me.

I however, could only stand there in his embrace, awkwardly.

"I'm glad you were looking for me. And I'm happy I found you."

"Yep!" I tried to sound as happy as I could. "You always could." I flinched as I made another reference to the past.

"I wanted to tell you sorry again…for treating you like I did."

Alarm filled my throat. "No! you didn't know who I was. I like you the way you are. You don't have to change Li-san."

He released me, ruffling my hair. "Okay, go ahead, I'll see you tomorrow."

I nodded and gave a small wave as I walked out the room and out the house.

_I felt so happy. I couldn't wait to spend more time with Li. It made my cold feel like nothing._

* * *

The next morning, I opened the door of our house to find the young lady that had been so helpful at the Li mansion. 

"Rina-san?"

She smiled. "You forgot your uniform yesterday. I was told to deliver it back to you."

I looked at what she was holding. It looked brand new. "Rina-san, are you sure this one's mine. I don't remember-"

"Master Li thought it was better to buy you a new uniform after seeing yours yesterday. I hope you are not angry."

"Oh, no I just wished he hadn't gone to the trouble. Please, how much did it cost?"

"Master Li specified that the cost was taken care of and for you to enjoy." she smiled and gave me the new clothes. "I must take my leave now. Have a nice day Sakura-san."

I closed the door and stared at the gift I was given. Uniforms weren't exactly cheap.

"Who was that?" Touya stepped out of the kitchen, a newspaper in his hand. "Is that new? Wow, are people just handing out uniforms now?"

"It's a gift from Li-san. I'm going to pay him back though."

"Li-san? Who's that?"

I shook my head. "Syaoran. I left my old uniform at his house yesterday and he bought me this new one."

"Ohhh…the gaki. I was surprised when I got his phone call." Touya glared at me. "Stop hanging around him. I thought he was gone for good. How did you find him?"

"Touya! It's been so long since I last saw him. He still doesn't remember much of his past. You know he was my close friend. He remembers me now."

My brother just frowned. "Well you can just go and tell him that I don't like what he's doing and I don't approve of it." he rolled his eyes. "And I _know_ what he's doing."

"Onii-san?"

"But," he continued. "Since he phoned to tell me where you were last night, I'm going to give him one chance and he better not screw it up."

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh he'll know what I'm saying. And you!"

I jumped. "What!"

He pointed an accusing finger at me. "Don't spend the night at his house anymore. Monsters and head cases like him don't mix."

"He's not a head case!"

"So that means you're still a monster?"

"I didn't say that!" I was about ready to throw a shoe. "I'm going to go change."

"Are you sure the clothes will fit you?" he called up the stairs. "Unless he was smart and ordered monster clothes!"

I could hear his cackles all the way up the stairs.

* * *

My face fell when I stepped through the back gates of my school. It occurred to me then that I would no longer have the comfortable feeling of being invisible. Not if I was going to spend time with Li. Then again, I didn't actually stop and ask him if he wanted my company during school time. I wanted very much to spend my time with Li, but there was no doubt in my mind that that would cause unwanted attention for me. Li was too popular…too handsome for his own good. 

I blushed at the thought. This had been happening too frequently ever since the first time he had held me in his arms. I didn't like the thought of my liking him turn into my loving him. If he ever found out, I was sure it would make our relationship awkward. I knew I would have to hide it from him. And maybe the feeling would go away. Besides, it was probably the idea of such a handsome person embracing me that was making me feel this way.

As soon as I took my first step around the corner of the school, in order to enter through the main door, (I always came from the back and made my way around to the front because the front gates were always crowded by the students in the morning.) I noticed Li leaning against a large tree just by the gate. He probably thought I would enter that way.

It was a horrible idea on his part as I laughed silently in my head. Not only was his just standing there stirring up attention, but Eriol was standing right next to him with that warm smile on his face, almost inviting the girls to approach them.

I pitied Li, but I hesitated to walk towards them. I hated crowds and if I did approach Li and Eriol, people would probably start wondering why I was allowed to talk to them so easily. My heart raced at the thought of the rumours that would spread. However, my conscious was kicking in at this time and I wondered how long Li would continue to stand there.

I decided to make my move. It would be wrong to leave him standing there. Stealthily, I slipped into the crowd, more uncomfortable than anything. I could sense Li's apprehension even from a metre away. He was going to explode any second and even if it was me tapping him lightly, he would have thought it was someone else in his rage.

How could I get his attention!

"Li-san!" it was no use of course, everyone was calling out the same thing, rather they were calling Li-kun, but in the crowd, it all sounded the same. Before I knew what was happening, a person elbowed me hard to take my place and I stepped back in surprise. I wanted to cry…why was this so difficult? Another girl pushed against my shoulder to propel her forward and this time I fell to the ground.

I cringed at my skinned knee. I couldn't get my new uniform dirty! It had been a present…I forced myself to get up quickly, looking up suddenly when I felt a warm hand wrap around my upper arm.

_Ah! No…_

"Li-san, wait!" I pulled my arm from him and his death glare grew all the more intense. "Pretend you don't know me." I whispered. "I just wanted to tell you, you don't have to wait for me anymore by the gates. I better go." I shot to my feet.

"Sakura!" he called me back and as I continued to run away, I could almost feel the anger that radiated from him. I just hoped he wouldn't vent it out on the crowd.

_How were we ever going to spend our time together if it was going to be like this?_

* * *

"What the hell was that this morning!" Li slammed his hand against my now empty homeroom classroom and caused it to close shut with a loud piercing crash. 

I jumped at his abrupt greeting. The lunch bell had already rang and as I was collecting my books, I was wondering why the whole class had left in such a hurry. Most of the class usually ate their lunches in class. It was only when they were all evacuated and Li came charging in that I realized why everyone had left.

I was somewhat glad that I knew this was Syaoran or else just knowing it was Li would've scared me.

"You're s-still angry?" I asked.

He crossed the room to me. "I was kind enough to wait for you this morning and when I see you, you're lying with your face flat on the concrete. Then I come to help and all you can say is 'pretend you don't know me'! Are you stupid!" he stared at my surprised face. "You..." he narrowed his eyes. "are too oblivious."

I opened my mouth to respond when the door reopened and I was surprised to see Eriol come walking in with two large trays of food.

"Hello Sakura-chan. How are you today?" he turned his un-amused look to Li. "And you… shut up would you? The whole school can hear you outside the door." he placed a tray two desks away from mine and placed his own tray closer to me. "That far one's yours." he said to Li.

"Eriol-kun…"

Eriol looked up at me with kind eyes, reaching out to ruffle my hair. "Now then, today I will eat lunch with Sakura-chan. Let's forget all about what happened the last time we talked okay? We'll start fresh."

I smiled at him.

Li didn't say anything, but made a big production of sitting down in his chair.

"Ignore him Sakura-chan. I didn't tell him anything that went between us that night."

I blushed at Eriol's comment. I could tell he was making it sound like something else had happened and Li's fist shook.

"Who said I wanted to know?" Li scoffed from behind. "Like I care about what you do."

"He's just angry Sakura-chan. He was very happy this morning, waiting for you to come and jump into his arms. It just didn't work out that way, that's why he's so-"

His control broke then. "Can you shut up!" Li yelled, ready to throw his chopsticks at Eriol.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry. Don't get angry. I don't usually come in through the front gate. I'm not very good with crowds." I fidgeted with my fingers. "You two are so popular and crowds are always with you. If someone like me begins to spend time with both of you, others will start to talk, won't they?"

I looked up at the two unreadable faces.

Finally, Li heaved a sigh. "Who told you to spend time with Eriol? It's just me you're supposed to spend time with." he placed his chopsticks down on his plate and rested his chin on the palm of his propped up arm. "I don't like crowds either, but let them talk if they want. You said you wanted to spend time with me right? Are you going to let them get in your way?"

"I thought you said being seen together wouldn't help your image."

He tossed me a dark glare. "Well now that I'm giving your permission, stop complaining."

I blinked and sighed. He was right. I might not have been able to interrupt Li's life or hinder his popularity, but if he said it was okay, then I would do my best to make him happy. It was because I didn't know all of him yet. I didn't know what made him happy or sad because of how much time we had spent apart. But I wanted to know. He was still capable of kindness and I wanted to show him that same kindness in return.

"If Li-san thinks it's okay, then I'll try harder."

Eriol seemed to amused at hearing this because his smile grew larger. "Li-san? That's one I hardly ever hear. And to think…I only get a -kun."

I shook my head. "Li-san told me he liked it better than Li-kun because it gave more respect and-"

"Shut up!" Li frowned . "I told you to stop calling me that. Try harder to change that too. It's weird coming from you. You never called me...that." he shot Eriol a look as if to silence him from any comment he was going to make. "Spring break starts tomorrow. There aren't going to be that many crowds we have to deal with."

I nodded. The idea of spending time alone with Li made me happy.

"You're not still sick are you? You look a little red, Are you burning up again?" Eriol tossed me a look of half worry, half amusement.

"I, no I'm fine. Li-san took care of me." I had thought I was doing a good job in hiding my blush. I suppose not.

I watched as Li's fists began to tighten all over again.

Eriol placed a hand over the side of his mouth as he leaned in towards my ear. "If you call him that anymore, you're going to condemn his next class to his wrath. You should try making him happy Sakura-chan. Then he'll be in a happy mood and his next class will be thankful." he stood up and picked up his tray. "Okay, well I'm going to leave you two alone for now." he winked at me in encouragement as he let himself out the room.

"Sakura…"

I snapped my thoughts back to Li.

"I think if I spend more time with you, I'll start to recover my memory. Over the break, would you show me some of the places we used to go to?"

"Places?" I smiled. "Uh, even I can't recall some of them."

"I don't need to see them all. I think being with you will be enough"

My heart felt warm. "Okay, I'll do my best!"

He nodded and started to stand. "I'll pick you up tomorrow at noon." he caught the look of uneasiness I had on my face. "You worry too much. I won't bother you so much during school, but I don't care what others say, so I won't care whether or not you want to see me. I'll still come to find you."

"….ohh" I answered after some time. "O-okay." but as I watched him reach for the door handle, I got up to my feet and caught his free hand in mine.

He looked back in surprise.

"Umm, don't force yourself to remember anything if it hurts okay? I think, you've become different since you found out who I was. I don't want you to spend time with me if it hurts you."

"It does hurt stupid."

I looked up into his eyes.

"I'm going to keep trying though. I never thought much of my past before you. I used to try as a child, but the headaches started to get worse the more I thought about it. I didn't let myself think much about it after I met Eriol. But now I want to remember because I can't deny our past existed."

I didn't say anything.

"You used to smile at me and tell me that we'd make new memories together. I always just nodded, but now I can't even remember those memories. I know I can't recall all of them, but there's something missing. I want to know what that is." he raised the back of his hand hesitatingly to my cheek, and though I anticipated contact, there was none. "When you're around and I think about the past, it doesn't hurt as much. That's why it looks like I'm happier when I'm not around you, because it's only with you that I can start to remember." he sighed, and placed a finger on my head. "Don't look like that." he frowned.

"Will you tell me what was missing when you figure it out?"

He gave a small nod.

_Even then, I knew there was something he wasn't telling me, but I believed he had good reason. A huge part of me admired Syaoran for the person he was, and though he kept the secret from me until the very end, he never really had a choice._

_I think that there was another reason for his sadness._

* * *

_to be continued…_

* * *

Heh, sorry if you caught any grammatical errors. I didn't look over this chapter as much as I usually would. (My BIGGEST fear Saying Sakuradid this instead of saying I did this...)

_-_silent wanderer


	5. Chapter 5

YAY! Another chapter. I'm pretty proud of myself. Usually I'm so bad with these sort of things, although I guess I'm kind of late with this one (DARN YOU EXAMS!). Anyways, stray memories seems to have solved itself neh? Sakura's found Syaoran and they're together! BUT (dun dun dun dun...) more's to happen...READ ON... ¬.¬

* * *

_Even then, I knew there was something he wasn't telling me, but I believed he had good reason. A huge part of me admired Syaoran for the person he was, and though he kept the secret from me until the very end, he never really had a choice._

_I think that there was another reason for his sadness._

_to be continued…_

* * *

_Stray Memories_

**Part V**

We had been to my house, our old elementary school and the garden square. There was only one more place that I wanted to take Syaoran. It was a little field with a large hill that was difficult to climb.

"Hey! You want to bring me up here and you're slower then me?" Syaoran paused and waited for me to catch up to him. It was almost as if the steepness didn't affect him at all.

"I don't remember it being this steep…do hills grow?"

He cocked his head to one side. "It's a good thing we never played tag here. You'd never win!" he laughed to himself as I swiped at him, his long legs already carrying him to the top of the hill. "C'mon! Hurry up!"

"I'm coming!" I trudged up beside him, panting slightly from the effort.

"You're cute when you're tired like that." he stated calmly. "So what did you want me to see? Hills don't exactly float my boat. "

I had to wait a while until I was capable of speech. Pertly because I was tired, but mainly from the comment. "Nothing really. Wait until the sun starts to set. It's really pretty like a picture. And then after, all the downtown lights go on and it's really dark and even the stars start to come out. I wanted to show it to you. You showed it to me first when we were kids."

Syaoran gave a thoughtful smile. "I think I remember."

"You do? That's great! I'm happy. At first it seemed like I wouldn't be able to help you." I stopped and looked intently as Syaoran's pained face. "What's wrong?"

He sighed then. "Sakura, my father died two years ago." he looked at me intently. "I need to tell you something."

I froze and my smile disappeared.

He continued in his detached tone. "My family owns a large corporation in America. They have companies in many countries you know."

"T-that's why you live in such a big house?" My smile was unsure.

"Yeah. And after my father died, grandfather took over his position again. They told me they wanted me to finish high school before helping out with the corporation and then I would be home schooled for the things I would have learned in university."

"Syoaran, I don't understand." It was _he_ who was ruining the mood.

"Sakura, my grandfather just recently got ill. He should have retired already, but as a child, I had been promised by my parents that I would be able to live a normal life until I was 18. So the media wouldn't bother me because I was the heir to the Li corporation. That's probably why everyone just knew me as Syaoran, because my parents hadn't wanted my last name to coincide with the corporation."

"But everyone knew you as Syaoran. Not Li." I was waiting for him to start laughing and say he was kidding.

He just shrugged. "I didn't want anyone to call me that. I started using Li. No one really suspected the name to have some connection with my family's corporation. My folks were paranoid."

"That's why you never wanted to show me where you lived? Syaoran, I never would have told anyone about your lifestyle if you told me."

"Sorry." he said curtly. "I should have said something."

I bit my lip. I was just managing to make him more guilty. I wanted to slap myself. "No, you're right. I probably would have said something to someone. You don't have to apologize."

He looked at me with determined intent. "At the end of this year, I have to help out at the corporation Sakura."

"T-this year?" I asked, shocked.

"No one's forcing me, but I feel like I have to go. It won't be permanent and we have a lot of companies here in Japan so I'll be flying in and out."

I didn't say anything. My heart felt funny.

"I won't be back for at least three years though. I don't think mother can handle it by herself. I wanted to let you know first."

"Oh? Is that how it is?" I looked at a small flower sprouting from the grass. "I understand." I hid my hands behind my back so he wouldn't see them shaking. "Three years isn't that long. What's three years compared to a lifetime?" I made a pathetic attempt to laugh.

"Sakura…"

"I never knew that about you. I'm happy you trust me enough to tell me this. I'd probably do the same thing in your position. And to think, when you return, you'll be all over the news. And it's long distance, but I could always phone you. And-"

"Sakura." I finally looked up at him and his stone eyes made me feel insignificant. "I had decided I was going to leave Japan before I realized who you were."

I couldn't say anything.

"When I had decided, nothing here was holding me back. I never made any close friends besides Eriol. And I knew I would have to leave everything behind if I did get attached to something. My parents told me when I was young that it was better not to grow fond of anything, but since your parents knew mine, I was introduced to you."

I nodded. His parents had probably wanted him to have at least one companion.

"I never thought there was someone looking for me. I wondered whether I had left anyone special behind when I was told I had lost my memory, but I was a child. I didn't think I could have seriously developed any sort of bond at such a young age."

"I understand. It's okay, you don't have to explain everything. You have to go and that's that."

Syaoran ran his hand through his hair. "If you want to cry, then cry. Stop looking so pitiful. It makes my head hurt."

I didn't. I pushed in my tears with everything I had. I couldn't cry. It would've meant that the whole day was a waste. I should've been happy to spend what time I had left with Syaoran.

_After I found Syaoran, he was leaving again. It made me wonder why he went through the trouble of trying to remember our past._

* * *

"Who needs to cry?" I said weakly. "I'll be able to see Syaoran again. Crying would just make him feel guilty right?" I did my best to give a smile, but it probably came out lopsided. 

"You-you're happy then?" he had that stern look in his eye as if warning me to answer correctly.

"Not happy. I'm just encouraging you." I pointed to the sky. "The sun's starting to go down." I took a few steps away from him.

"Fuck…" he whispered harshly. "I'm not apologizing Sakura, don't think you can guilt me into saying it."

"I-I don't know what you're talking about. Who's accusing you of being g-guilty?" It was difficult for me to control my voice. "It's just three years. I'll manage. Quit feeling bad."

He gave a scoff. "You're -too -clueless."

"W-what do you mean?" I wished the conversation was over. "Li-" I began angrily. "You never told me, it's not my fault for being clueless."

"That's not what I meant."

"Oh? Then what are you talking about? This is hard enough without you having to make fun of me." I didn't look at him.

He approached me quietly. "Would you wait for me Sakura?"

My heart clenched when I lifted my head.

"You might not care as much as me, but I want to be with you. Three years is what I'm asking. I'll definitely come back then."

"Syaoran…what are you…" I wasn't sure of what he was asking.

He gave a wavering look of hesitance and moved extremely close to me. Then with a sudden force, his hand flew to my back, pulling me towards him. His mouth covered mine and my eyes widened in surprise. My heart felt warm as I felt the back of my eyes heat up. After a moment of brief shock, I did my best to return the gentle warmth he was giving me.

When he lifted his lips from mine, I was unable to hide my blush. And as he looked down at me with an unreadable expression, I ducked and buried my head in his thick knit sweater. I felt his lips brush the top of my head.

"You'll wait for me?"

I nodded feverishly against him.

"Good." he whispered, embracing me like he did that day on the street.

When he released me, I was unable to look at him directly in the face.

"The sun's starting to set. Didn't you want to see?"

I nodded, avoiding him and wobbling to the centre of the hill to sit down. I blinked when a light coat fell on my shoulders.

"You didn't bring a jacket. Wear that or you'll catch a cold again." he joined me on the grass and looked out to the scenery.

I peeked at him through the jacket. He was so calm even after what had happened. I blushed at the idea that he had been planning this from the day before. I had been scared to tell him how my feelings had changed towards him, but he had revealed his feelings first. I couldn't stop smiling.

_Syaoran had turned into my Syaoran._

As a child, I had hardly ever seen Syaoran with his actual chestnut brown hair. But, his natural colour suited him. Just looking at him as he gazed at the sunset was too much. My whole body hummed with joy. And as we gazed out at the sky turning darker, I forgot about Syaoran having to leave.

* * *

I was surprised when Syaoran's head fell to my shoulder. 

"Syaoran?" I turned and when I was just inches from his face, close enough that I could kiss him, I realized he was fast asleep.

The night was completely dark now and the sky was twinkling with city lights. I smiled at his sleeping face. He must not have had a good night's sleep yesterday.

I brushed the hair from his eyes. Leaning in, I asked "Hey Syaoran." He didn't move. So sighing, I lifted a finger to his forehead, feeling more confident with my words as he wouldn't have been able to answer. "That day on the street...is this what you wanted to tell me?" I smiled at his sleeping form. "Bet it was...But of all the times to tell me how you feel, you have to do it after you tell me you're leaving. Thanks a lot…" I stared at my finger on his skin. "How are we going to spend time together now?" I took away my finger and brushed my lips against his forehead.

I waited patiently for a time until I decided it was better for him to go home and sleep.

* * *

Syaoran yawned as we neared his house. He eyed me eerily. "I thought I left you at your house. Quit following me." 

"It isn't very far, I'll walk home after."

He tossed me an irritated look and I thought he was actually blushing. "I'll be fine on my own. What am I? A little kid? Get lost and go home."

I nodded, but kept following anyways. "You know…this last week, you looked so happy. I thought you had found someone else."

"Someone e-else?" he pushed his hands into his pant pockets. "That's dumb." he said quickly. "I wouldn't just think my childhood friend was anyone."

I laughed and caught up with him.

Syaoran stopped walking and rolled his eyes. "Okay, we're about halfway to each of our houses. Uh, wait." he took my hand and dragged me in the opposite direction of his house. When he stopped abruptly, he nodded. "This is halfway. We go separate from here. Fair?"

My face twitched. "But, we're closer to my house." I wondered whether the few extra steps we took had been necessary. "Plus, I wanted to tell you-"

He must have thought I was making up another excuse and so, he cut me off. "It's dark, there's scary people out and about." he tossed me a withering look. "And you would fall for all of their tricks."

"I would not!"

"You're lucky I'm letting you walk home alone even from here. Now march." He crossed his arms in a superior way as if there was no room for argument.

I begrudgingly turned around. "I'll see you tomorrow then. Sleep well tonight Syaoran." I gave a short wave.

He smirked uncomfortably and didn't move until I was out of sight.

_He wouldn't even let tell him how I really felt._

* * *

**Three Weeks Later**

I knocked hesitatingly against the door of the Li mansion. Earlier, Syaoran had phoned my house and ordered me to come over.

_We would have seen each other anyways, but today was the day when Syaoran would leave me._

I suppose that gave me more of a reason to see him before the big departure. After that day when Syaoran had revealed his feelings to me, I had wanted to tell him how I felt about him. Any free time I had, I wanted to spend it with Syaoran. I wondered if he knew how much I liked him.

Whenever I thought about our relationship, I wanted to smile. Syaoran wanted me to wait for him. It wasn't entirely a huge concept as I knew I would never stop waiting for him, but the idea that _he wanted _me to wait for him was somewhat special.

At school, we still couldn't spend much time together as I was still in fear of the rumours, but even then, people began to see what was really going on. I didn't particularly like the attention. It was nice to be acknowledged, but I've always enjoyed my solitude and the close friends I had. However, Syaoran was determined for us to spend time together and more often than not, it was he who found me.

Summer break arrived too quickly and for it's first week, I went out of my way to avoid Syaoran. Of course he tried to contact me, but Touya was happy enough to tell him I wasn't home most of the time. The probability of his irritation at me when I would see him would be high, but I didn't want to face him.

I had been gathering my courage all week to form words to my feelings, in order to tell him how I felt before he left. It was almost impossible for me to speak coherently about it though. The thought of saying goodbye for three years was too much. The idea should have encouraged me to spend more time with Syaoran, instead of ignoring him for a week, but the more time I spent with him, the more difficult it was for me to tell him how I felt.

That day, however was the day Syaoran would leave. I had thought the disheartening leave was to be at the end of the summer break so we would have more time together, but yesterday, when I had decided to pick up the phone, Syaoran had yelled in my ear, telling me to come to his house early in the morning tomorrow, just as the sun was starting to rise.

And as I stood in front of the door, I knew it was now or never. It swung open immediately and Syaoran stood behind it, as if he had been standing there the whole time.

He gave me a dark glare. "Ignoring me for the whole week?" he asked in an icy voice. "What the hell do you think you were doing?" he asked again in that calm, controlled voice. "Does my leaving mean nothing to you?"

I wanted to take a step back, but I held my ground. "I didn't think you were leaving so soon. You never actually told me when it was you were leaving. I'm sorry."

"Do you know what day it is today?" he formed the question carefully.

"D-day?" I repeated. "It's the day you leave for America."

"Wrong." he stated, grabbing my arm and pulling me into the house. "So you weren't taking the whole week to plan something?" he looked me down, suspiciously.

"Plan what?" I felt like it was a waste of time to start one of our arguments when he would be leaving in the afternoon.

"You -are -so -clueless -it's -almost -sad."

I really had no idea of what he was trying to say to me. Instead, I felt his hand tighten on my wrist. "Syaoran?"

"It's my birthday! How can you not know that? Geeze, were we friends!" he gave a pouty look and crossed his arms. I felt suffocated by his anger.

_His birthday_…I didn't know it. I felt slightly ashamed then. It dawned on me that I had never spent his birthday with him before. It had never even been brought up. I looked up at Syaoran's pouty face. He had told me his birthday for the first time.

"What's the matter with you?"

"Your birthday…" I whispered.

"Damn straight it is. Don't tell me it's all coming back. I thought I was the one with brain problems."

I shook my head and flung my arms around his neck. He stumbled in surprise and fell to the carpet floor, pulling me down with him. "Happy birthday Syaoran." Lifting my head I gave him a smile, wondering in the back of my head, whether or not the redness that was on his face a second ago counted for a blush. "You've never told me your birthday was the thirteenth of July."

"I-I didn't?" he asked, any indication that he was angry, now gone. He looked flustered.

I tapped my chin. "I'm learning more about Syaoran everyday. I'm happy." I blinked as I looked back down at Syaoran. "Oh, I'm sorry. I must be heavy!"

As I pushed myself off him, Syaoran seemed to have something else in mind, and he pulled me under him, reversing the order we were just in.

"Fine. I'll let you go easy this time." he said with a sly look. It must have occurred to him that our position was an advantage for him. "Since you didn't know it was my birthday, you can give me my present here. Then I might forgive you."

My face turned completely red. "Present, h-here?" I asked, disoriented. "W-what kind of…present?"

His face came closer to mine. "I want a kiss."

My heart rate immediately went back down again. "Oh, is that all?" I laughed uneasily underneath him.

His eyebrow went up and he looked down at me curiously. "What were you thinking?" when I didn't answer, he was silent.

I couldn't hold in a blush. His eyes were intense and serious. I didn't like how he was looking at me.

Finally, he smiled wolfishly. "Okay, we can do that too!" his voice was eager like a child's and he wrapped his arms around my entire being, nuzzling his face between my neck and shoulder.

"Do what!" I couldn't move. "You said you only wanted a kiss!" I tried wriggling away.

He raised his head and loosened his grip on me. "You want to kiss me?" he grinned. "Yeah sure." he dipped his head down.

My eyes widened in alarm as I shook my head, scared to how far he could take even a simple kiss. "Wait!" I fended him off with waving motion.

He winced as he pulled his head back from getting hit and glared at me. My eyes were clamped shut. Sighing, he sat up on the ground. "So stingy." he said in an irritated voice. "First you avoid me, and now you jump onto me, knocking me to the ground, only to tell me that you never knew it was my birthday. Well you sure know how to ruin one."

I opened my eyes, surprised to see Syaoran give up so easily. "Sorry." I sat up to look at Syaoran. "I really didn't know though. And I really am sorry for knocking you to the ground. Are you hurt?"

He scoffed and leaned back on his arms. "Next time you lunge at me like that, I'm getting my kiss."

I frowned. "But it **was** you who wanted the kiss. Not me…Plus," I fidgeted with my fingers. "I was scared about what you would do after the kiss."

"After the kiss?" Syaoran looked at me as if I was stupid. It was a while before he saw why I was fidgeting so much. "Ohhh-" he smirked. "You actually thought I was going to start…" his voice trailed and his voice was less than amused when he spoke again. "You think I'm just a horny hound dog don't you?"

" I do not!" I blushed, changing the subject. "Why did you call me here so early? Are we going to celebrate your birthday?"

"It's my eighteenth birthday you know." he tilted his head towards me. "Technically it's not really time to celebrate yet since I was born later in the day, but soon I'm going to be dating a minor." he cackled evilly, with a mischievous look in his eye. "If we want to do anything we still have some time before it turns illegal you know."

"D-do what?" I asked in fear.

"Oh don't give me 'do what?' You obviously know what now. I'm leaving soon, all the more reason to isn't there?"

I shook my head, completely understanding what he was suggesting. I was about to protest, when I realized I could have some fun with this myself. Swallowing my fear, I lifted my head to look at Syaoran as seductively as I could. "Hmm. A kiss from Syaoran _can_ make me forget about everything else." I approached him slowly and he seemed hesitant.

"Sakura…"

"Hmm?" I smiled, surprised by my own boldness. I just wanted to see how far I could go with this.

I was barely a foot away. And out of nowhere, Syaoran's arms wrapped themselves around me. My face crashed against his chest.

"You can have your way with me anytime baby!"

I blushed, fighting to breath. "Hey… stop joking around."

He released me and laughed. "What about you? The Sakura I know would never be that outgoing with a guy. You shouldn't do that again. It's too tempting." he grinned.

I was reminded by the hound dog comment he made earlier and as I opened my mouth to say he was exactly that, I realized we had been out in the open all this time, in the main room. Attendants were passing us, blushing.

I glanced at Syaoran, who appeared as if he could have cared less.

"I want…" I began.

Syaoran's eyes widened in surprise. "Yeah, what?" he seemed expectant.

"you to move away!" I pushed Syaoran's hands off my shoulders. "It's your birthday! You're 18, 18! It's illegal!" I inched away from his wolfish grin.

He recovered quickly, rubbing his shoulders. "Fine, you're right. It'll be better to wait three years."

I didn't think I could get any redder.

He laughed. "You look like a tomato. Don't worry, we still have lots of time. You said you'd wait remember?" he smiled that warm smile.

"Y-yeah." I answered feeling warm, as I always did when viewing his smile.

"Anyways, my family's throwing this big party here tonight just before I leave. I told them I wanted it here. It's going to be a little early because my flight leaves a little after noon, but that's why we have to get a head start."

"Head start?"

"Yep, we're going shopping. You want to look presentable at my party don't you?"

"I do!" I said earnestly.

He laughed and rose from the floor in one swift motion. "Good. I want you to be here for the party. Mother says she's excited to see you again."

As Syaoran helped me up to my feet, I wondered in what tone his mother had said that in. She had good reason to think her son would never see me again. Had Syaoran told her about me? And like before, would she want what was best for her son? I thought she might've separated us again.

* * *

I sat uncomfortably in a soft chaise as Syaoran nodded to the lady helping us, picking out the clothes I seemed incapable of choosing myself. They were beautiful. All of them. It excited me at the thought of trying them on, but I didn't like the idea of Syaoran paying for them, especially when I was entirely sure he would. I had thought we would be mainly shopping for him, but it had turned out to be quite the opposite. 

"Hey Sakura, what about this? It's pink, reminds me of you." he indicated to a soft pink wool gown.

"You always say pink things remind you of me. I'm not pink you know!"

He frowned. "No, but you're kind of red right now."

His comment didn't help my disposition as I opened my mouth to retort back. But, I couldn't get in a word before I was ushered into the changing room. I didn't know where to start. So many outfits that didn't quite suit me. I stared at each neatly hanging from the hooks of the room.

"Did you need any help miss?"

"I'm just having some trouble zipping up something, it's alright, I'm fine." I lied. I hadn't even begun to put anything on.

"Well I could always come in and help you miss."

"No! No, it's alright. I'm starting to get it." I lied again. "The first skirt is tight, perhaps you could get me another?" I stalled.

"Of course, I'll be back in a moment's time."

I gave out a breath of relief. I wondered whether I could've made an escape from the room. I opened the door slightly, allowing just a sliver of space so I could make sure the coast was clear. I came however, face to face with an un-amused Syaoran, bending down to match my height.

"Something wrong?" he asked innocently.

I slammed the door back without thinking. "Hey, you can't just stand out there like that. What if I came out?"

"That's exactly why I'm standing here." he called calmly from behind the door. "You know, I could always come in there and help with that zipper you seem to be having so much trouble with." his voice dripped with disbelief. "I chose those clothes. You think I don't know your size by now?"

I heard a soft thump against the door, and I imagined Syaoran leaning his weight against it.

"Let's go back to my house and then we'll come back okay?"

"Hmm…and why would I want to do that pray tell?"

"Well, I don't have any money to pay for the clothes and-"

"Who told you you were the one who was going to pay for it?"

"But you already bought me that uniform, you wouldn't let me pay you back."

"So? Let me pay for this too. Geeze, what's the big deal?"

"I don't want to use your money for things like this. I didn't know we were going to go shopping. If I could just go home and get my money-"

"No!"

I flinched.

"Pick out something and I'll pay for it. I won't see you for three years and you won't let me buy something as small as an outfit for you?"

I remained quiet for a moment's time. "But, I want to buy something for Syaoran too."

The uncomfortable silence was broken when he made another uncomfortable sound. "Damn…you always-" he stopped what he was going to say. "Pick out something and I'll pay for it. Then you can pay me back later okay?" As if he could've read my mind he added, "I'll even get you the receipt so you won't think I'm lying."

I hesitated, not knowing if I could believe him. Finally I relented. "Okay. Deal."

Slowly, I began trying out the clothes.

* * *

I was slightly disappointed after shopping together that I was unable to spend more leisurely time with Syaoran. Someone had phoned him and he had left, telling me he had something urgent to attend to. I took the time to run home and drop off my outfit before heading back out the door to buy Syaoran's gift. 

What would Syaoran like? The question unnerved me. What could I possibly buy that he wouldn't have? It was only after searching for almost an hour, I realized that it was hopeless. I wanted to give him something that would mean something to him, perhaps a token for him to remember me by. Three years was a long time.

It was then that I realized I had everything already in my possession to give him what I wanted.

* * *

_When I had finished wrapping my gift, I was ready to see Syaoran off. This party was a celebration and even though I was happy at the idea of spending his birthday with him (as this was the first one of his I've ever attended) my heart felt like crying._

_That's why with my gift, I wanted to tell him how I felt before he left._

I was arriving just as the others were arriving. I didn't recognize anybody, but I no longer felt odd for wearing the soft wavy pink dress I wore. Neither were my curls entirely out of place with the visitors entering the grand mansion. I had remembered that Syaoran had said without my glasses I looked more familiar, so I had worn my contacts today. I felt oddly unprotected.

The women wore gowns and dresses and the men were adorned with suits. If it had been later in the evening, when the sun had begun to set, the whole scene could have been from a movie.

I held my present by the small, blue gift bag I had placed it in and followed the crowd into the main foyer. Inside it was bright, but less decorated then I would have expected. I looked around for a familiar face, but I was the only one that seemed lost. Everyone else was having conversations as if they had known each other for years.

Soon, each individual began heading for the back of the house. I followed, surprised by the right turn we all took at the end of the hallway. I hadn't gone through this particular door the last time I had been looking around. Through it, there was a beautiful area with skylights and a large bar counter to the right. Many round oak tables filled the room, each decorated neatly with exotic flowers. The table clothes were all pale reds and peaches. Further to the left, there was a grand piano on a hefty stage, a few inches from ground level. The rest of the floor was a huge open space for dancing.

I had to hold my breath as someone opened the glass patio doors out to the healthy courtyard, drizzled in the sun's dew. A long wooden table covered with blue cloth, was placed against the end of the courtyard, holding a wide variety of hors d'oeuvre and other foods.

What I wanted to view however, was the garden. Syaoran had always loved gardens and being alone. I wondered if that courtyard's particular garden was his. A garden cultivated by Syaoran's own hands.

"Excuse me miss." a gloved hand touched my arm.

Startled, I looked up to see a young man in uniform.

"I'm sorry, but I am under strict orders to permit only those invited to the master's party in. What is your name?"

"Kinomoto, Sakura." I answered, hoping he would take out a large clipboard and check off my name at that moment.

"I'm sorry, I have no one like that on my list. I'm afraid I will have to escort you out." he pushed lightly on the small of my back.

"But, I'm sure I was invited. Please, perhaps you could check the list again?"

"I am sure you are not on the list miss."

The next thing I knew, I was forced outside the front steps and the door thudded behind me. It didn't make sense to me. Syaoran had wanted me at his party, hadn't he? Why hadn't he added me to the invite list? I remember feeling slightly hurt at that moment, but my anger overcame that feeling as I headed back in the direction of my house. I wrapped my light jacket tighter against me, so I didn't stick out like a sore thumb while walking in my dress.

I continued to mutter angrily at myself. Though Syaoran may have wanted me at his party, a person like me would hardly have been suited for a celebration as prominent as Syaoran's 18'th birthday. I was too simple to be with all those other people. I understood that.

But even accepting the truth, I was a few blocks away from my house when I bumped against a solid mass in front of me. I stumbled back and my hand flew to my nose, which had taken most of the impact. I looked up. "Sorry! I wasn't looking-" my eyes widened. "Syaoran!" I took another look at him, in case my eyes were seeing illusions.

_Syaoran._

* * *

_to be continued..._

* * *

Heh, this doesn't count as a cliffhanger does it? I wonder where Syaoran was...what am I talking about? I know where he was! MUAHAHAHA! So thank you for the reviews and...is Syaoran's b-day on the 13'th of July? Yell at me if it isn't, s'okay. And I'll be back soon! Bye bye. (This short story's getting long...) 

-silent wanderer


	6. Chapter 6 Sayonara Syaoran

Hello again! Just one more exam and I'm free everyone! But, yes everyone seems to be wondering where Syaoran was, and what he was doing...you don't exactly get the answer in this chapter, but you will don't worry. (Syaoran wants to keep it a secret!) Stay tuned to figure out what he did...AND, thank you for reviewing and please do not be depressed by this chapter, I didn't like writing it much either. Something just didn't flow...enough badmouthing my story, please do not let that deter you from actually reading...haha

_Stray Memories_

I continued to mutter angrily at myself. Though Syaoran may have wanted me at his party, a person like me would hardly have been suited for a celebration as prominent as Syaoran's 18'th birthday. I was too simple to be with all those other people. I understood that.

But even accepting the truth, I was a few blocks away from my house when I bumped against a solid mass in front of me. I stumbled back and my hand flew to my nose, which had taken most of the impact. I looked up. "Sorry! I wasn't looking-" my eyes widened. "Syaoran!" I took another look at him, in case my eyes were seeing illusions.

_Syaoran._

**Part VI**

He towered over me. He was dressed in a black suit, that hung tautly to his body. His shoulders were broad and with his hair, slightly slicked back, his eyes like flames, and an undone tie flaying in the wind, I couldn't deny his anger. As he looked down at me, his chin was tilted slightly to one side and his eyes burned into mine. I felt that I should have been scared.

But I wasn't.

He had left me alone and I had fallen into his trap. The embarrassment of being kicked out of his house was too much. I levelled my gaze to match his. If he was angry, I had all the more reason to be the same.

_Then again, maybe I was just trying to show him that I was capable of not always being nice. That I wouldn't take everything the world handed out to me, good or bad. That I wasn't "useless"._

After a moment of silence, I heaved a sigh and said "Your party looked nice. Have fun, I'm going home." and I started to walk away.

He was speechless for a while and that allowed me to take a few steps before he caught me. "What the hell did you say?" his voice was loud, but I didn't flinch. "You're going home!"

I was irritated with that look again. As if I was the stupid one. But then, I knew perfectly well he was leaving today.

"I said have fun at your party. What do you want from me?" I frowned into his face, perfectly understanding that I was just managing to fan the flames with my words. The angrier he became, the more satisfied I would be.

And If not being included on the list had been a joke, it hadn't been funny. I could've almost imagined Syaoran waiting at the gate of my house, timing to see how long it would take for me to get kicked out of his mansion. The thought however, didn't last long.

_It was hard for me to think so bitterly of Syaoran._

He looked like he was going to say something, but instead, he glared and grabbed my hand. "We're going, hurry up."

I yanked my hand back. "I told you I don't want to!" Despite his tugging and my arm going numb, I still felt the need to protect Syaoran's gift, so I made sure to hold it away from him.

He stopped pulling at my words. "You don't want to?…" his words came out harshly and formed the sentence into more of a statement, rather than a question. He was careful with his next words. "What are you trying to say?"

He was entirely serious so I hesitated. In the end, I retorted back with my own unleashed anger. "Nothing! I'm not saying anything. Don't I have the right to decide whether or not I want to go somewhere or not? I don't want to go!" I froze when I finished. Looking up, I hoped Syaoran wouldn't look hurt.

He looked down at me for almost a minute. "Why are you so angry?"

"I'm not." I snapped.

He sighed. "What's your problem? It's like there's two of you. The old you and then…" he waited. "then this. I don't remember pissing you off this much you know."

His words hit me somewhere and it hurt. He was right. I wasn't like how I used to be. I wasn't. I kept my eyes to his chest as I replied. "If you don't like it then just leave me alone. You're going to be late for your party. Bye." I turned to leave, but once again, he grabbed my hand.

"Stupid! I told you I wanted to be with you!" he spun me around with a strong enough force that all I could do was stare at him.

I looked to the ground, unable to meet his penetrating gaze.

"Did you know how happy I was to find you? I don't care who you are compared to then, it's all the same to me. I want to be with you. Why else would I ask you to wait for me? I told you to not always be so nice." He scoffed when I failed to answer him back. "You idiot, why can't you process that? Do you think I'm the kind of person that would play around with just anyone!"

I just stood there being scolded. "I-I didn't say that."

"Then what's your problem!"

"I was just at your party." I said without emotion.

"What?"

"I was told that I wasn't included in the list of invites, so I left. Obviously there was a reason why I wasn't on that list."

He glared at me. "What the hell? Who told you to go off alone? I was coming to pick you up! Do you know how long I waited! I could've have been at the party already if it wasn't for you." he stopped when he realized the immensity of his words.

I was surprised to hear he was waiting for me however. I almost felt touched at the thought. Nevertheless, I answered "Sorry, for keeping you from your grand party."

He sighed in irritation, placing a hand on my bowed head. "Shit…why does this always happen? Why can't anything ever work out?"

I was thinking the same thing. After all this time, when I had finally found Syaoran, everything was falling apart. It made me doubt our relationship. Especially when I thought about the long three years before us.

"Here, let's just skip the party and go somewhere else okay?"

I looked up in surprise and shook my head. "No, everyone's waiting for you. It's wrong to keep them waiting. Just go."

"Fuck them! You think I'm going to spend my last day in Japan trying to make them happy? Now let's see…" he tapped his finger on his chin. "Let's go…hmmm no…what about…"

I looked up at him then. _He wanted to be with me? _The thought that he would ignore his responsibilities altogether just to spend time with me made my heart beat fast. I knew how important his coming of age was. He was going to take over the Li corporation.

_Stupid. Didn't he know that there were more important things than us spending time together? How could he have been so reckless and think only about our relationship? Just thinking about it made my heart feel funny. He was always saying things like that. It always managed to make me want to smile through my disbelief._

Before I knew what I was doing, I reached out and held tightly onto a part of his tie that was swaying in the wind. I pulled it down with all I had, until his face was inches from mine. The abrupt attack seemed to surprise him.

"Ow, The hell are you-"

I placed my lips softly on top of his. The moment seemed to last forever and I could hear my heart beating against my chest. My temples throbbed. "Thank you." I whispered against his lips, smiling into his widened eyes.

When I released his tie a second later, I placed my hand in his and dragged him in the direction of the mansion. I couldn't meet his gaze and I decided it was best if I didn't look back at all.

"I'm sorry. I'll go with you to your party. Everyone will be waiting for you." I felt like my blush was stained into my cheeks. This had been our second kiss and I had initiated it. I barely knew what to do with my lips and to initiate something like that, made my heart race.

* * *

It was only when we were at the front porch that I decided I would chance it and look back at Syaoran. His face was blank and I couldn't tell what he was staring at. It definitely wasn't in my direction though. His free hand covered his lips and I could tell he seemed to be trying very hard to suppress a blush. He looked embarrassed and angry at the same time. I revealed a frown that I was unable to hide, dropping his hand like it was poison.

"Stop looking like that…" I muttered under my breath, as I gestured for him to knock.

He didn't move, ignoring me and dazed by his own emotions.

Sighing in frustration, I took the duty upon myself and pressed the door bell. It was slightly embarrassing to be back.

The man that had kicked me out opened the door in surprise. He looked down at me as if I was garbage, but I didn't run away.

"Please miss. You must leave. I have informed you that you are not invited to this party. I do not wish to escort you off the property."

"I wouldn't have come if I wasn't invited." I stated, the idea that Syaoran was particularly useless at the moment was just in the back of my mind. I cringed when the man took me by the wrist, tightly. "W-wait!"

"Sorry miss. You have no business here." He fought off my struggle. " Please do not want to make a scene."

"Let go of her."

The next thing I knew the pressure on my wrist lessened dramatically, and a look of terror had appeared on the man's face when I looked up. His hand twisted in an unnatural way as I turned to Syaoran.

Syaoran's features were harsh and a side of his mouth quirked up in a dark smirk. "Don't touch her." he said, continuing to smile. "If she ever wants to come into this mansion, you'll welcome her, alright?"

The man nodded, as he seemed overcome with pain. "Master Li…I-I didn't see you there! Yes, of c-course! Any friend of yours is w-welcome."

"Syaoran's eyes narrowed and his smile grew larger. "Good. Now apologize to her." He gave a quick kick to his shin and the man fell down on his right knee. His cry made my ears cringe.

"I'm sorry miss. It won't h-happen again!"

At this time, I pried Syaoran's hand away from the attendant. "Syaoran, let go of him! You're going to break his hand!" I turned frantically to the attendant. "It's okay, I forgive you!"

Syaoran just looked at me, his entire mood changing back. "Are you okay? What do you want to do with him?"

I stared at him in disbelief. "Just let him go. I'm fine." his words took a while to register in my head. They were harsh and cruel, but…I couldn't help but feel something for his sincerity. I felt guilty for ever doubting him.

"You're sure?" he asked seriously. He turned to the attendant and tightened his grip on the man's lapel. "You can kick him around if you want."

I couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but nevertheless, I tugged his hand away from the terrified man. "It's fine, let him go. Are you crazy?"

"He was grabbing you, and you think I'm crazy?" Syaoran pushed the man's hand and lapel easily away and entered into the mansion. "My head hurts." he growled.

I sighed when we were inside. It wasn't me who had the split personality. Syaoran was capable of pity and most of the time acted like an idiot around Eriol, but to others he was almost a monster. He had a temper that maintained a short fuse. His strength was overwhelming at times. He was simple. Too simple I thought. Quick to be happy and even quicker to be angry. Like a child. It was probably why when he spoke so seriously to me at times, that it made my heart beat faster.

"You picked a nice dress." he commented out of the blue.

I had been angry at him, but his words caught my surprise and I didn't know what to say. The murder was gone from his eyes, like it had that day he had stated his glare was the only look capable of getting rid of the girls that flocked him.

He seemed to wait for an answer. "Hey, say something when someone compliments you. And take off that jacket, it's summer!"

"Oh." I said dumbly, doing what he asked. When it was off and one of the servants in waiting took my jacket, he stared down at me. "Quit looking at me like that. It makes me self-conscious."

He frowned. "You look at me all the time." he stated almost too bluntly. When he saw a look of surprise on my face, his curiosity grew all the more larger. "Ohh, so you thought I didn't notice? Anyways, I suppose someone like you should feel that way."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, indignantly.

He opened his mouth to make a snide remark, but didn't have the chance to answer because a crowd of attendants came over towards him.

"Everyone is waiting young master. Please join the festivities."

"Madam has just arrived young master, she would like to see you."

"We are all awaiting your speech."

I stared dumbly at the scene. It was like nothing I had ever seen before. His lifestyle was quite different from mine. Just watching made me dizzy.

Syaoran however, seemed indifferent as he brushed off everyone and reached out to take my hand, tugging me into the lounge I had been admiring earlier. I pulled my hand from his just as we entered and he glanced at me in suspicion. He couldn't say anything because the entire room was filled with applause and Syaoran was brought to the stage.

"Sakura-chan!"

I followed the sound of the voice and saw Eriol signal me to sit down at one of the tables near the stage. I smiled at viewing a familiar face and went over to sit down.

"Sakura-chan, you look pretty. You came with Li then?"

"Thank you." I smiled. "You look very handsome too, Eriol-kun." I blushed at his smile and sat down at the table. "Hmm, I came with Syaoran. I told him he didn't need to pick me up, but he did anyways. How stubborn." I laughed.

"He really likes you, neh Sakura-chan?" that calm smile of his had returned and was dancing on his lips.

"I don't know about that." I replied. "He probably doesn't know what he wants. It'll be good for him to leave Japan and see other parts of the world."

"And you'd like that?"

I had an idea that he would ask me that and I was determined to not show how uncomfortable I really felt. "Of course I'm happy for him. Actually, I think he's really happy to be given the responsibility of taking over the corporation."

Before he could reply, the stage microphone went on and I looked up to hear the applause welcoming Syaoran onto the stage. While the clapping began to fade, I wondered what he would be saying. More than that, I wondered whether he had the capability of talking in front of such a large group of strangers.

He waited for silence, his face hard to read. I was almost proud of the dignified tone he took.

"There is no doubt that the Li corporation is beginning to diminish, but the thought that it will continue to diminish is an ignorant one." He was calm with his words, as if the whole speech had been imprinted already in his head. "As of now, many of you are wondering who the current leader is, and if due to the last leader falling under sickness would the whole corporation fall to ruins. Perhaps it would all go to my mother? Perhaps anyone who is attempting to destroy the corporation would think it a good idea to take advantage of the last leader presiding, due to his condition? Then every one of you would be wrong." He gave a determined smile. "As this day marks my eighteenth birthday, I am able to announce that I will be taking over my family's corporation, completely coming in power when I am fully experienced. If anyone tries to hurt this corporation, they will first attempt to find a way through me. I am here to announce my leaving to America today."

At this point, the applause had turned into an uproar. I also moved my hands in a weak clap. Syaoran emanated the strength of a leader. I may have doubted him before, but I could see that Syaoran really was needed. He hadn't told me much information regarding the corporation and I never felt the need to ask him. The fact that the cameras and the paparazzi were going off like no tomorrow made me wonder what I had gotten myself into. Waiting three years for a someone that was probably now one of the most famous individuals in all of Japan? It scared me.

As I looked back up at the podium, I saw that an older man was now speaking, Syaoran just beside him. I didn't pay attention to the man's words because Syaoran caught me thinking and stared down at me with a curious gaze.

When he came down, everyone rose from their seats and began to mingle. A few young ladies quickly found their ways to Eriol and I noticed the same situation with Syaoran. Who wouldn't want to be the heir of the Li corporation's centre of affection? Even as I was thinking it, it felt ironic that in fact, that was the last thing I wanted. Even though I loved him, Syaoran and I were so different.

_All I wanted was to see Syaoran happy._

I watched as Syaoran pushed past his admirers, coming towards me. And as he approached me, I couldn't meet his gaze. I took to staring at the carpet instead.

"Sakura, I want you to meet my mother." he didn't wait for me to get up, just pulled me lightly to my feet and urged me over to a prominent looking woman who were having a conversation. When she noticed the two of us, I saw that her eyes lingered over our clasped hands before coming to rest directly on me. I quickly pulled my hand from Syaoran's.

"You-"

I cut him off, smiling at his mother nervously. "It's nice to meet you, Ms. Li."

"And you." she replied, eyeing her son's slight outburst. "Syaoran has told me much about you. You must have been surprised to find my son again."

I didn't know if she was being particularly hostile, but I could feel that she wanted to protect her son and I respected that. I continued to smile. "I'm glad I found Syaoran again."

"We were close." Syaoran added, almost carefully, as if he was testing his words with his own mother. 'I remembered her easily after I found out who she was."

She gave her son an odd look and then turned back to face me. "I knew your father, Sakura. I respected him."

"I'm sure he feels the same towards you. He told me to tell you hello."

"Did he now?" she turned to her son. "And has Syaoran told you anything else interesting about me?"

"Mother-" he stepped in.

"Of course." I announced, stopping him. "Syaoran too respects you very much. I could tell."

She didn't say anything for a moment's time. Finally she gave a short smile. "It's unfortunate that my son must take leave so quickly just after you met."

I nodded. "It is." I could feel the heat from Syaoran's gaze on the back of my neck. Suddenly, his form appeared in front of me, almost like a protective barrier. I didn't particularly think it was necessary and I knew his mother didn't mean to sound so threatening. I reached out to stop him, but stopped at hearing his words.

"Mother, stop it. Sakura has told me that she is willing to wait for me for three years. After that time, I will come back and see her."

"Syaoran?" she seemed surprised by her son's words of possession. I knew I was. He had grown serious again.

"I told you she's someone special to me." He gave a soft smile to his mother. "I just wanted you to know that I'm not taking over the corporation to make you happy. I'm not doing it as a favour for you to allow me to be with her. It's because I know what my responsibility is, but aside from that, I promised Sakura I would come back to Japan and see her one day."

"Y-you…what are you saying? You can't possibly-"

"I love her mother."

Even before my eyes could widen, paparazzi went off in all directions. I stood there, unable to move, feeling that I was sinking into the floor. A look of anger and genuine surprise appeared on Syaoran's mother. The entire crowd was mumbling and pointing to the girl who the heir to the Li corporation had just admitted to be in love with. Me.

Time seemed to be freeze. From my peripheral vision, I saw the attendants attempt to stop the cameras from going off, but it was to no avail. They had been invited to take pictures and record the announcement of the new leader of the large corporation. They just never expected to also sneak in an even more interesting event. I wanted to hide my face.

_Syaoran…did you know your mother wouldn't approve? Is that why you were doing this?_

"You cannot be serious Syaoran. You are still so young. Both your father and I have constantly warned you at a young age to not get into any relationships. If this is just a phase, I will not question you. However, even I cannot approve of this. You are the heir to your father's corporation. You cannot associate yourself to just anyone." She looked almost pained.

My heart was racing. I knew there was another reason to why she was opposing our relationship. Somehow, Yelan still labelled me as a burden to Syaoran. It was the reason why she had dissociated her son from me in the past.

"She is not just anyone." Syaoran replied with a forceful tone. "We grew up together,"

At that, the journalists scribbled down Syaoran's direct quote. No one had known about our past up until then. No one in Japan had even known the Li corporation had an heir.

"She won't be a phase mother. I intend to keep my promise to her. I will come back to her."

"I will not allow it." She seemed to dislike the fact that her son was being so free with words while cameras were flashing. "You will come to your senses now or you will leave today and come to your senses in your time away from her."

Syaoran didn't reply back. His fist shook at his side.

I couldn't stand it any longer. It was too much. Somehow, somewhere inside of me, I knew there was another reason to why Syaoran's mother didn't accept me. I just didn't know what it was. I wanted to stop the entire confrontation, but I didn't know how to. What right did I have to speak out then?

Silently, I looked up and when all I could view was Syaoran's back, I was grateful. I was entirely sure that the cameras hadn't caught a clear picture of my face…yet. I swallowed my guilt and tugged gently on Syaoran's jacket, pressing my face into the fabric.

His anger dissipated as he looked behind his shoulder at me, my movement catching him off guard. Faintly, I heard a curse and there was a brief pause in the entire room.

"I've said what I've wanted to say, and up until now, I have always done of what you have asked without any question. I will arrive at the airport on my own."

And with that, he pulled me quickly out of the room and back outside of the mansion.

* * *

We had been walking in silence for quite some time now. I looked up at Syaoran, only to see the anger that was evidently there. I gave a brief sigh and suddenly stopped walking.

"You didn't include me on the list because of your mother." I stated sullenly, out of the blue.

He stopped then too. "She never told me about you back then. I told her you would be coming, but I knew she wouldn't add you to the list."

"That's why you insisted on picking me up." I smiled. "Thank you."

Syaoran glanced at me and the tense lines on his face quickly vanished. "I had something to do. That's why I was late in picking you up."

"What were you doing?"

"You'll see." he put a long finger against his lips and winked. "Secret."

I eyed him suspiciously. "...we should be heading back, it's almost time for your flight."

He shrugged and kept walking, tilting his head slightly back to look at me. "You think?"

"Of course, you only have a little over an hour now."

"Hmm." he had a thoughtful look on his face. "I'm starting to have doubts of whether I really want to leave."

"What?" I asked. "Didn't you say it was your responsibility? You felt so strongly about it."

"Well I feel strongly about you too."

I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. "How can you say that so easily? After your own mother told you to forget about me too."

"She never told me about you Sakura." Syaoran's face was unreadable. "She kept me away from you. I can't forgive her for that."

"She's your mother Syaoran. Plus, I found you eventually."

"I had headaches because I was always trying to remember you." he whispered harshly. "And she never tried to tell me why. I don't care, I'll make her understand."

I frowned, teasing him, I asked "So does this mean you're giving up on me? You've made your decision to leave right?"

Syaoran tossed me an un-amused look. "You think I'd give you up that easily? Would you give up on me that easily?"

I just stared at him.

"Hey! What's with that pause? What the hell are you thinking? What other answer could you have!" He came over and leaned over me, glaring.

I shook my head, taking a step to close the gap between us. "I wanted to say…" I rested my forehead on his chest, "Thank you Syaoran. Thank you for today." I felt grateful to Syaoran. "I thought I was going to be angry at you because you told the whole world we were together, but you got me out after. Thank you."

He seemed pleased by my actions and slowly, I felt a pair of warm arms wrap around me. "Forget it. So, what did you get me as a gift? You did say you wanted to get me something didn't you?"

His gift was in my hand bag, hanging from my shoulder, but I had more important thoughts in my mind and I didn't answer him. "You know, this is probably the best goodbye we can have. I won't be able to see you off with your mother waiting."

"I told you I don't have to go." he leaned his head in so that his lips brushed my ear. "If you tell me to stay, I will you know."

My face felt like it was on fire. "I-I want you-"

"Yes?…"

"I want you to go." I sputtered quickly.

His whole body seemed limp for a second and I waited for his usual outburst. Instead, he released me and took a step away so that he could look clearly at me. "Do you really want to get rid of me?" His serious eyes made me hesitate.

"Hey, you know that's not what I want." I waved him away. "Stop looking at me like that, it makes my heart hurt." I bit my lip as I realized what I had said out loud. Carefully I raised my gaze to Syaoran.

I couldn't believe I had said that in front of him.

"What…did you say? I make your heart hurt?" he smiled in surprise and before I knew what was happening, his lips touched mine in a brief kiss. "You shouldn't say things like that if you're trying to get rid of me. It only makes me want to lock you up and keep you to myself." he grinned and gave me a quick hug. "I knew you wanted me to stay with you!"

I almost choked when I tried to speak. "Get away! Get away!" I fended him off. "You can't just do that so suddenly. It's not fair! Kiss thief!" when I allowed one of my eyes to open, I saw Syaoran contemplating. He seemed to have ignored everything I had said.

"Hmm, we left Eriol all alone. I wonder if my mother is pounding him for answers." he smirked at me. "I seem to have secrets from mother and she likes to think I tell Eriol all about them. Wonder if she's put him on the rack yet. Poor guy."

I was alarmed with his words. "Let's go back and get him. I can't believe we left him alone. Will it really be that bad?"

He grabbed my arm before I took to take even two steps. "Hey." he said, annoyed. "You failed."

"Failed what?"

"My test. If every time I bring up someone of the opposite sex and you get all excited like that, how do you expect me to ever leave you alone! Three years is a long time you know. Someone could just some come and pick you up."

"What are you trying to say?" I frowned. "I have standards you know." I crossed my arms.

"Of course you do." he grinned. "You're with me aren't you? I'm a pretty great person. My standards on the other hand…" he stopped to smile down at me. "obviously are a little more flexible huh?"

My fist shook. "You…" Just before my hand was about to swing out at him, his words halted me.

"Sakura…" he smiled. "You're beautiful. Stop believing me when I say otherwise."

Something caught in my throat.

"I meant what I said back there Sakura."

I looked up at him.

"You heard me didn't you?"

I didn't answer.

"Well?"

"I heard." I answered.

"Good. Because I don't want you to care about what anyone says about us okay? If we're together, I'll be happy."

_Those words…'If we're together, I'll be happy'. It's because of those words, that I'll continue to follow you. Your happiness, makes me happy._

I bobbed my head up and down, unable to speak. Then, out of nowhere three men in black approached the two of us. I tried to make out their faces, but the sunglasses they wore prevented it. I glanced over at Syaoran and saw that he was unfazed. Had he been expecting it?

"Master Li, we were told to escort you to the airport."

If he was surprised, he hid it well. "Were you now?" Syaoran asked. "Well, why don't you go back like the good little dogs you are and tell 'Madam' that I said I would be arriving at the airport on my own. She's getting along in the years and I don't blame her for being hard of hearing."

"Madam has ordered us to bring you back." One of the men reached out and I almost pitied him for what I knew would happen next.

Syaoran twisted the man's arm, locking it behind his back. The man tried wrenching away, but was unable to.

"Leave." Syaoran said, stopping to glance over at me through heavy lidded eyes. "If you touch her, I'll start breaking fingers."

At that point, I wondered whether or not these men were taking Syaoran's threats seriously or whether I should prepare myself for their attack. I watched in disbelief as the man took to the latter, lunging at Syaoran altogether.

"Stop!" I yelled in warning, but even then, I knew these men were professionals. With Syaoran's strength, it took two men to secure both his arms. The third man that had been in Syaoran's grip, fell to the ground, thankful for his free arm.

"Let him go!" I cried angrily. "What are you doing? He said he would be at the airport didn't he?" Syaoran continued to struggle and the other men were using most of their energy to suppress his power. They began to pull him away and I saw that a large black limousine was parked just off the sidewalk.

I didn't know what to do then. Did I have the right to keep Syaoran here with me? Even if he stayed here with me, we wouldn't have long before he did have to leave.

_Three years…three years. _

Finally, I forced my feet to move and I ran in front of the car, in front of Syaoran and his capturers. My hands flew out horizontally to stop them from moving any further. All four men took a moment to look at me.

"I-" I pulled out a small blue bag from my own handbag and held it out. "Syaoran, you know it's time for you to leave anyways. You have less then an hour before the flight and the car will take you there faster than if we walk or ride the bus." I looked up and placed a hand on one of the large men's arm. "Please, you can let him go. He'll go with you."

Syaoran stared down at me, trying to move his hands , only to realize that someone was still gripping them tightly. Growling, he wrenched one hand free, glaring daggers at the other man who held his other arm. He let go immediately too.

"Uh- this is for you. Happy birthday." I gave him the blue bag and he accepted it in a sullen way as if slightly dazed by the powdery blue tone. "Don't open it until you're on the plane okay? You should get going now. I-uh-I'll wait. I'll wait for you for sure." I tried to give the warmest smile I could give. "I will as long as it continues to make you happy."

Syaoran smiled warmly at me and my heart felt like it would explode. Placing his arm on the back of my head, he pushed me closer to him, his lips brushing my head softly. "It does. I'll come back." he whispered. And then after the lingering touch, he released me and climbed into the car with ease.

I couldn't see his face and he didn't take another look back at me as the limousine's engine started. I watched as the door shut in my face and even Syaoran's profile was lost to me. I took a few steps, following the car as it began to drive off, waving and hoping the tears that I could imagine falling were really not there at all.

* * *

As I walked home, I kept glancing at my watch, counting the minutes to when Syaoran's flight would be taking off.

_Just a little over thirty minutes._

* * *

_to be continued…_

* * *

Well, sadly, this story is about to end soon don't you think? Just a few more chapters and it's going to wrapped up. Bye bye Syaoran! 


	7. Chapter 7

Hi, how is everyone doing? Hmm, it feels like some time has past from my last update til' now...so anyways, this chapter is erm...revealing, but I actually liked writing it. You're all gonna have to wait a little longer to find out **1**. why Syaoran was late picking Sakura up and **2**. what the present is. Sorry! Well, go ahead and read, I'll stop writing now. Oh yeah, I wrote this chapter, but if you find any flaws in my plot, please tell me as I would like to fix them all. THANKS!

(I'll explain someof the plot that's so hard to add to the storynext time.) **AND** (some of you have asked me to email you when I update, is that everytime I update or just a one time thing? I'm so oblivious...)

* * *

As I walked home, I kept glancing at my watch, counting the minutes to when Syaoran's flight would be taking off. 

_Just a little over thirty minutes._

_to be continued…_

**Part VII**

"Excuse me?"

I turned to the speaker. He was with two other boys, a few years older than myself. "Yes?"

The same boy spoke, his words nervous. "Are you Kinomoto, Sakura?"

"Yes. Is something wrong?" I didn't recognize these boys, but I wondered whether they were friends of Touya. "Are you friends of my brother? Touya?" Their frowning faces made me all the more worried.

"There's been an accident. We were told to find you. Would you come with us? Our other friends are with him right now, calling for help."

"Where is he?" I asked, already following the boys around the street's corner.

"This way." one of them with spiky blonde hair pointed to across the street where I could see a large cagey gate that led to where, I had no idea.

"He's there?" I asked, wondering why Touya had always thought working at odd and end jobs were better than maintaining a consistent job.

"Just through that gate, past the warehouses." another boy answered, his eyes covered by a pair of expensive looking sunglasses. "He was carrying a few boxes and when we heard a yell, we knew something had gone wrong."

I winced as I imagined what could have really happened. "Is he okay? Has help arrived yet?"

"I don't think so." the blonde answered. "We would have heard the ambulances, but he was calling your name."

"Touya…" I clamped my fists to my chest, fighting off the coldness I felt, though the sun was beating down on me heavily. Even the light jacket I had on couldn't stop the shiver of fear I had. When I was pushed lightly into the warehouse nearest to the pier, I shook from my thoughts and looked for Touya in the darkness. "Touya!" I called. But, above my shouting, I could faintly hear a small chuckle. I turned to face the three boys that had brought me to the warehouse. The storeroom's door was halfway closed by the time I had spun around.

"What are you?-" I was unable to finish. The door came down with a crash.

From the inside of the storehouse, a microphone went on. "What luck it was to find you." a voice cackled. "We called someone alright. We informed the news station that we have the Li corporation's woman. They'd like pictures of you you know." The voice laughed loudly. "What a gullible idiot!"

My confusion began to wear off and my blood began to boil. I didn't know if they could hear me, but I decided to yell anyways. "You can't be that bright! If you called the news station, the police will be here soon too. Nice plan!"

_I had been tricked. I couldn't believe it._

"Like we hadn't thought of that?" the voice answered, almost as if he was bored. "I had a few of my friends pick up some people from Japan's most famous news station. No one knows where we are and we switched their equipment. Ours don't have GPS. No one will be able to figure our where we're filming. Not even from checking where the signals are coming from. We have that taken care of for now too."

I soft growl crept up my throat. "Why are you doing this? I don't even know who you people are. Are you crazy? Li corporation's woman…Li corporation's woman! What does anything have to do with them?" I was a mixture of emotions, even through my puzzled enragement. "Do you even know my brother?"

"Enough for you to gullibly trust us it seems. Man you have to be the dimmest person in the world to follow a few strangers."

"Let me out." I said carefully. I wanted to beat the one up who had called me dim. Did caring about the state of my brother mean I was stupid? I didn't know anyone who went around lying about someone's else's condition for no good reason. And I definitely knew they didn't have a good reason for what they were doing.

"Nope. We have a plan to fulfil. You're going to be our puppet for the next few hours."

"And then what?" I asked. "Why did it have to be me? What does this have to do with the Li corporation. I have no ties with them. They're leaving Japan." As I said the words, I wanted to stop myself, but my eyes flew to my watch and even in the dark, I could make out the numbers.

_Just under twenty minutes._

If this had anything to do with Syaoran, I prayed for his safety, silently wishing for time to move faster so he would be out of harm's way sooner.

"Here they are. Soon you're going to be famous, Sakura-chan." the voice sounded amused.

"Don't call me that." I raised my voice. "Why did you call the news station? Why do you need me!"

"No need to get all angry. You should have already known that you never had a chance within the Li corporation. Their heir is above you. High above you."

"What's that have anything to do with what you're doing!" At this point, I began to feel around for anything I could use to get myself out, or at least find a clue to how to get out.

"That bastard…" the voice suddenly whispered. "He just doesn't get it. When someone attempts to kill you, you should just die."

"Wha-what are you saying?" I could barely hear him.

"Neh, Sakura-chan. You're on national television. Strike a pose would you?"

I looked around wondering where the camera was. I couldn't see clearly and I thought he was bluffing, trying to avoid my question. "Answer my question! Who do you think you are? What does this have to do with me?"

"You really should stop acting like a mad person. It's really unattractive. How is the Li corporation supposed to accept you now? Really, you're not doing your status any good. The heir needs to marry a wealthy, polite lady, not a rough, unrefined girl like you."

I didn't say anything that time.

The voice sighed. "Okay, just for you, I'll tell you what I want. Turn off the camera for a minute would you? Be right back Japan…" he paused for a moment. "Actually, turn them back on. Japan should know the truth about that idiot heir to the corporation." he cleared his throat. "Hmm, well I won't say my name, but for the record, let's just state my name as revenge seeker. Anyways, that brat always thought he was above everyone. Stupid traumatized kid. I should start from the beginning, shouldn't I?…He always ignored everyone, thinking he was high and mighty. Ignored everyone, expect this girl that would follow him around. That girl would most likely be you neh Sakura-chan?"

His voice held a bitterness that made me want to cringe. How did he know so much about Syaoran's past?

"Everyone always noticed that he was somewhat attached to the girl named Sakura. But to him, everyone else was below dirt. Years older than him, I had a younger sister. We'll not say her name, but I'll tell all of Japan that she never deserved what Li did to her. One day, she came home crying. I couldn't ask her what was wrong because she wouldn't tell me. All she kept saying was she was rejected by Li, rejected by Li. I of course thought nothing of it; all women had their problems, even eight year old ones. But, she came home with a few bruises and cuts days later."

I listened carefully as I glanced down at my watch.. The story held a familiarity.

_Ten minutes. _

"I asked her how she was getting hurt, but she kept saying it was okay…whatever that meant. I at the time, thought her words didn't make a whole fuck of sense, but I looked around her school the next few days and found out who this Li brat was. I watched my sister approach this idiot for quite a few times, and he rebuffed her every single time. His words were funny. _'You have no right to speak to me. Do you know who I am? Why can't you understand I'm not interested in someone like you. I can't be with you because…you're below me._'" he scoffed. "This is who you worship Japan?" he gave a harsh laugh. "He's right though. Even you Sakura-chan are _below_ him. He is beyond you. You want to know why these news journalists are so interested in getting a picture of you? I'll tell you why they're so damn interested. It's because you're dirt! You're dirt when compared to him. You're dirt just like my sister was dirt."

"That isn't-"

"Every single person out there in Japan is watching you're face on national television! They see you trapped and yet no one knows where you are. Would they come and save you! You're right, that idiot should have already left for America. Three years is a long time. Do you actually think he'll come back for you? Helpless and below him!" he screamed. "She was helpless too. That's why I had to take matters in my own hands. Smartest thing I'd ever done. Too bad it didn't work."

"Wha-what did you do?" I asked. The words that the man had quoted from Syaoran were familiar.

'_You have no right to speak to me. Do you know who I am? Why can't you understand I'm not interested in someone like you. I can't be with you because…you're below me._'

I had been there the day Syaoran had said them to this man's sister..._to her_. The words had been harsh, but even though I couldn't understand why he said them then, I could see it now. Syaoran hadn't been able to start any relationships with anyone. His mother had forbidden it. I knew he had only tried to hurt her because he thought it would make her hate him.

_There had been a long hesitation between 'because' and 'you're below me'. It was as if Syaoran hadn't been able to find the right words._

"What did I do?" he asked the question as if I was stupid for not making the connections. "What the hell did I do! I pulled him over to the side and told him just what I thought of him. Bratty little idiot that thought he was the greatest. What I didn't understand was that glare he kept in his eye even as I looked down at him. Why he continued to think he could come out of the situation the winner when he was ten years younger. I wanted to rip him apart." There was amusement in his next words. "Instead, I took the more humane way out and tripped him into the puddle of mud by the sidewalk. That asshole didn't know a good thing when it hit him on the head. I couldn't take it anymore when my sister came home one day…" his voice grew slightly shaky, and I had an idea to where this was leading to.

_Five minutes._

"I wanted to take away any memories he had of you Sakura-chan; the only thing that made him smile. Then he would be alone. Alone in his own high and mightiness. I debated my choices of course, but blood wasn't very appealing to me. Amnesia would have been perfect. Patients hardly ever regain memories you know? So I did what I had to do. He was walking towards your house one day…I remember stepping on the gas pedal without even thinking. He didn't see the car coming."

My eyes widened, as the confirmation was now there. "Y-you're…it can't be- You should have known we could have started over and made new memories. If that was your only reason, you're lying. You're lying!"

"Hmm. I couldn't exactly kill him though. Amnesia was perfect."

"You're a liar…how would you have known he would've gotten amnesia…" My throat clenched in emotion.

"Lying! Don't make me laugh." he cackled. "Do you think I'm stupid? I had been following that idiot. I found out who he was and I could have just as easily revealed who the Li corporation's heir was to the whole population. Instead, I sent a letter to the corporation. It said you were the cause of the accident. What choice did they have to distrust the letter? If they did want their son safe however, they would never come into contact with you again. You. The girl who thought she could stand with someone even my sister couldn't match up with? It would have been fine if he would have just left, but he had to find you again. You had to help him regain his memory! Who the hell do you think you are!" he stopped for a moment's time, laughing when he continued. "Are you late for something Sakura-chan? You seem to be constantly looking down at your watch. Tell Japan just what you're anticipating. The flight should have left ten minutes ago. Do you think he can save you? Hah! Three years is a long time for you to just sit around and wait. I however, have set up a private little television set for Li to watch on his way to America. Did you want to smile for him one last time?"

I couldn't believe my ears. Syaoran was watching. It was my chance to make sure he didn't come back.

My fists tightened at my side. "Stupid…"

"What did you say?" his voice sounded curious, maintaining it's own superior tone. "I'm sure Japan is curious."

I lashed out. "Stupid! Do you think I actually care what you do to me? Do you think I care whether Syaoran comes and saves me? Don't you think I would be happier that he's away from you! Have you completely lost it! You ask me who I think I am, judging me even though I've never seen you in my life. You think I'm the one who's dirt? You think you can solve your problems by just pushing them away. You're stupid if you thought your plan would actually work."

"Pushing my problems away? I took care of my problem. It isn't my fault he met you again. He's lucky he's leaving. Then again, would he care about your safety if he knew where you were? A simpleton like you? All of Japan can now see him for who he is. All of you out there should know Li doesn't care about any of you. You all think the Li corporation is powerful and wealthy, but you don't see who the person is behind it all. Li, who cares for nothing but his own needs. Nothing he does will ever benefit any of you out there."

"Shut up!" I stopped him from going on. "You have no right to judge anyone in your position. Why should anyone listen to what you have to say? Someone like you would never understand the ability of logic. You're right, he is lucky to be halfway to America. Why would someone like Syaoran be beaten so easily by someone as weak as you! For all I care, I wish he would stay in America forever. That way he'll never have to see such an ugly person as you!" As I finished my sentence, I heard a loud clash from inside. My first thought was that of horror; that Syaoran had actually come. When I heard laughter however, I knew I was wrong. I looked up at the small furnace attached to the ceiling of the storage room from where the sound came. The furnace panels were open.

_The flight should have left already. Even though I'm scared, I'm happy Syaoran didn't get involved._

"Smell that Sakura-chan?"

"Smell what!" I snapped.

"Of my victory and of your reality." he laughed again. "I was going to wait until later, but your little speech forced me to take action. You shouldn't be so hasty with words in _your _position" he sighed. "I opened the furnace. Is something coming out Sakura-chan? It's a poison gas. If you breath it too long…well I guess you can figure out what will happen. Oh and if your lungs start hurting, that's nothing to be alarmed about. It's supposed to do that. It's only when you feel yourself gasping for fresh oxygen through the foggy gas that you should start to worry."

I watched in alarm as the warehouse's ceiling furnace puffed out the foggy gas he was referring to. Distraught, I moved away. "What are you doing?" I asked angrily. "You actually plan to kill me? Is this your revenge against Syaoran?" I scoffed, despite my situation. "You're stupider than I thought if you actually think that's going to work. You said I was dirt didn't you? Why would he care about my life!" I screamed at the furnace that was releasing more and more gas. The room was empty and there was nothing I could use to stop the gas from coming out. As the smell entered my nose, I almost gagged. It was strong, almost sour and it burned my throat as it entered my mouth. I took the final step into the corner of the warehouse.

"You're trapped Sakura-chan. And you're right. If Li's smart, he'll stay in America. Even if he wanted to save you, he should have been here already. They take their own private jet you know? Just more proof how _beyond_ you they are."

"Stop saying that. I know what I am! I know what others say, and I know how I compare to Syaoran!" My blood boiled as I screamed. I forced myself to lower my voice. "All of Japan's watching you you said. I don't doubt they are only watching to see whether I survive through this or not. You're right in asking me if anyone would really care about my life. Those watching right now probably don't even know me, let alone care for me. But if this is the only way you think you can find even ground with Syaoran…by hurting me, than I would be dirt for Syaoran this one time. I would allow you to step all over me if it meant you leaving him alone in the future."

_I hoped I didn't look as scared as I felt. I didn't want to show all of Japan my fear. I didn't want Syaoran to see me in a state of fear. All I wanted was him to stay away._

He was silent for a moment's time. "…you may think I'm contradicting myself, calling you dirt and someone who shouldn't be with Li, when I plan to get rid of you. Why would I go after you when I know you are nothing? It's the same reason why I hurt that bastard in the first place. So he would forget about his memories with you. If he thinks my sister was dirt, than why is he with someone from a lower class than her? It doesn't make sense. He couldn't possibly have loved you. And now, you're going to die because of your blindness."

I choked and my eyes watered from the gas. "T-this is a-about me?" I covered my nose with my sleeve.

"This is about me?" he mimicked. "My sister told me about you once. Clinging to Li every single day. She said you had no shame. Now you're going to die and no one's coming to save you. Do you see this Japan! This girl who thought by being with the heir of the Li corporation, she too could gain power. Pathetic isn't it? And Li…you must be watching this. Do you like the show? I did you a favour. You don't ever have to return to Japan again. You should have no reason to. You're the reason why she has to die. You should have stayed down when I hit you." His voice cracked slightly and when he spoke again, he spoke with a sense of finality. "I suppose the police have found a loop hole in my plan by now so good night Japan. Think about who you worship and nice to have your attention."

I couldn't breath. My lungs were raw. I huddled into the corner of the warehouse and dug my face into my knees. The air was thick and my throat felt dry. I could barely hear what was happening outside.

"Sakura!"

I wondered whether Syaoran had really been watching me on television. I wonder if the police really had found a loop hole in my capturer's plan and if they were coming to save me.

"Sakura!"

I felt suffocated and my vision was blurring. My thoughts however, kept flying back to Syaoran's bittersweet, warm smile before he climbed in the black limousine, gone from me for three long years. Gone from me forever. "Syaoran…"

"Sakura! Where are you!"

I forced my eyelids to open and I moved my head slightly to the familiar voice.

"Damn!" I heard the curse over the speaker. "Get rid of the news cast." he ordered. "Why the hell is he here! He can't possibly be here to find that girl…Shit, you five take care of him. You were never on television, no one will recognize you." there was a scampering sound. "I wore a mask, but I still used my regular voice. The police won't be able to pin you. Fuck, how'd he get here before the police? Deal with him and run." A car door slammed. "Make sure he doesn't get to the girl!"

I couldn't make sense of what was happening. I shut my eyes again, just that simple movement almost too much. My head throbbed and all the oxygen in the room was out of my reach. Nothing was coming down my throat except the gas.

I heard the engine of an automobile and my mind whirled. The police had been too late. He would still be out there, a risk to Syaoran's safety. I couldn't open my mouth to protest.

"Sakura! What the-" There was a loud crash as I faintly heard a body hit the warehouse door. There was a following crash. "Let her go!"

"Syaoran…" I thought I could hear his voice. My limbs felt heavy.

"Only we know where the key is, if you hurt all of us, you won't ever free her." someone threatened. "She's been in there for over ten minutes. Any longer, she'll die."

"What the hell do you want? Let her go!" the voice sounded distraught.

"Stop fighting and we'll release her."

"Who the fuck are you- let me go!-"

"Hold him down!" one grunted. "Fuck, he hit me! Pin him down! Stop moving! Do you want her to die!"

My temples throbbed and I remember the last breath I took was hot and burned me to the chest.

"Do whatever you want with me. First let her out. Please." the voice was now strangled. "Let her out."

A voice was panting and there was a long pause before the warehouse was drowned by the sun's setting rays. The storehouse door rose and the gas pooled outside. I could faintly make out sounds filled with harsh coughs and a hard pressure was upon me. I was off the ground for only a few moments before I was dropped back down with a rough push.

"Sakura! Get up. Don't touch her. Sakura!"

"Get a grip. She's still breathing. Now you keep up your end of the bargain or else I'll deal with her myself."

There was a soft groan, then another. No screams of pain, just soft groans. A sound someone would give if they were uncomfortable, certainly not in pain.

A sliver of light entered my eyes some time later, and when I instinctively went to take in air, my throat protested and pain crawled through my lungs. My eyes widened to their potential at the sheer intensity of it and what I saw then made me think breath was no longer that important.

_Syaoran._

One man held him from behind while another took the burden of attacking Syaoran. My head couldn't form coherent thought, but I knew he shouldn't have just been standing there when he could have easily fought them and won.

"No…" I uttered, ignoring the pain I felt. "Stop it…" I tried again, hoarsely. I shakily pushed myself from the ground, only to fall back down. I concentrated on projecting my voice. "L-let…l-let hi-Let him go!"

The men stopped and glanced at my pathetic self. I could faintly see Syaoran's pride underneath the heavy lidded eyes he watched me through. His body was almost comparable to a rag doll. I felt like crying for being so helpless. I couldn't move. I couldn't even begin to lift any physical part of me.

"Sy…aoran. Stop..p it." I couldn't stop an inhuman cry from coming out my throat. Daggers sliced at my throat.

"S…saku." It almost looked like he made a move to free himself, but he restrained when the men decided it was best to ignore my protests and continued to pummel Syaoran. He wasn't screaming or protesting in any way…

"Please, let h-him go. T-that man…" my lungs were on fire. "he l-left. You d-do-on't have to h-hurt him. P-please. Stop." my throat screamed in agony.

My pleads were immediately to no avail and I watched as the men continued to ruthlessly attack Syaoran. A cut appeared just above his eyebrow, another cut on his bruised and swollen lip. His shirt was ripped at the shoulder, his hair flying in every direction and following the direction of his assault.

My heart couldn't take it and with everything I had, I propelled myself up to my feet. I whimpered at pain I had never felt before. "Dummy!" I screamed. "F-fight back! You know you c-can win! I-I'm fine! T-they can't hurt me…not anymore t-than it hurts n-now!" I saw a flash of surprise cross Syaoran's face and for a moment I thought he would take action. Instead, he continued to allow himself to suffer silently. "Idiot…"

"Sorry, you can't interfere. Back away." his grip on my upper arm was almost unbearable, but as he roughly pushed me to the ground, I couldn't hold in my scream of pain. Needles went through my body. I shut my eyes as I crashed to the concrete.

Another cry followed after mine and there was a loud hollow sound, like a body falling to the ground. Then more sounds following the same pattern. I couldn't move. I felt like I needed to see if Syaoran was okay.

"What are you d-doing? We had a deal. Damn it, you know what will happen to her…"

Opening my eyes to allow the smallest of light in and allow myself to see what was happening, I winced at the pain of such a simple action. Then I caught Syaoran, bloodied from head to foot, his white shirt ripped open, stained in blotches with dark blood. His face never looked more dangerous and as he approached the man that had pushed me down, he gave a smirk full of malice. His one sleeve went to wipe the blood from the corner of his lips. "It'd be a good time to run now." he purred dangerously, his intents evident.

"We released the girl-what the hell are you doing?" he backed away slowly, looking at his fallen comrades.

_The screams hadn't come from Syaoran. They had come from the men attacking him._

"No deal." Syaoran continued, walking towards the man.

The man grew a face of fear and finally thought it better to run.

Syaoran however, wasn't finished and caught him quickly, punching him hard in the stomach. Holding him by the collar of his shirt, he brought him inches from his face and smiled. "Never do you even think about touching Sakura again, understand?"

The man cringed.

"Don't even let the thought cross your mind." He brought his knee up and rammed it one final time into the area he had punched. When the man shrunk to the ground, Syaoran began to look weary once again. He bent down and leaned in to the man's ear. I could barely make out his words. "Tell your boss the exact same thing will happen to him if he ever tries this again."

_He was okay. Syaoran was safe._

My eyes blurred as a figure came towards me. An illusion. I was sure what I saw had to be an illusion. It was him…_But_ _It couldn't be. No matter what I had said to him, I had wanted him to stay with me. But he left… _There was a ringing in my ears, almost a screeching that was repetitive and familiar. Then something was enveloping me. I could no longer feel the press of concrete on my face. No, this was a different feeling. It felt limp and loose, as if it was protecting me from the crumble of contact. It felt nice. The kind feeling someone would receive after managing to save something important to them from a fatal outcome. Inside my head, I was telling myself to open my eyes to see what was giving me such a sensation, but it was physically impossible. I took to wishing this feeling would always be there whenever I wanted it to be; this warm envelopment.

And then it was gone. As if I had been pried from the previous emotions, the blaring in my ears grew loud and as I plunged into a dizzy unconsciousness, I could picture a faceless individual, with a bittersweet smile.

* * *

It was dark when I opened my eyes. It felt oddly comforting to see the moon's rays dancing on the floor by the bed. My mouth felt thick and the high ceiling was out of place in my mind. When I went to turn to my left, I felt incredibly sore. 

For a moment, he flashed in my mind again and for some reason I felt lonely. It was only when I realized I was in a hospitable room, that all my memories came flooding back. The police had come then? After that man had left the scene, he had ordered the others to remain behind, to take care of…I sat up in apprehension.

_Syaoran._

Syaoran had come to my rescue. Syaoran had stood immobile, not fighting off the attacks the others were so happily providing.

"S-syar…" I couldn't speak. My throat felt awkward and I realized for the first time since I had awoken, that it hurt to swallow. As I pushed myself up, my vision blurred and my balance was slightly off. I stumbled to the door, finding that I had a tall I.V stand connected to me. I took it in my grip for stability and shakily reached out to open the door.

Outside, it was even darker and there was no one in sight. I knew I had to find him. I needed to prove to myself that the worst hadn't actually happened. The last thing I remember was of being pushed to the hard concrete. I began to go door to door to see if I could find Syaoran in one of them.

I glanced into the room adjoining mine. Empty. I shut it and checked the next one. Children were fast asleep on their beds. I closed that one too, following this pattern until I felt like my energy would give out.

Was he hurt? I didn't exact know whether or not he was in the hospitable, but I continued to check in denial. I could faintly imagine the cuts and bruises on his body and I urged myself to keep searching. Why had he come back? How had he been able to find me? My grip tightened on the IV and closed another door. He had left in that limousine car with a detached air, as if our parting hadn't affected him in the way it had affected me. So why had he endured the physical attacks to save me? The fact that he hadn't fought back made me want to cry. At the time, I had watched the proud dignity burning in his eyes, but looking into them, I still couldn't understand why he wasn't unleashing it. Did he actually care for my safety that much?

_He hurt me more when he forced me to watch him in pain._

I sighed as I finished my second corridor. Forcing my weak limbs up the stairs, I walked down the left hallway and continued my pattern of checking every room. It occurred to me that I hadn't told Syaoran how I felt towards him before he had left. I had only said I would wait for him. I hoped he knew how I really felt, wherever he was. During our time together, my strong like towards him had ultimately turned into my deep love for him.

Cringing, I stumbled to the last corridor on the second floor. It was starting to appear hopeless. After the incident, he must have gone back to his responsibilities. He was probably already in America. There was no doubt that there, he would receive the best medication and care for his wounds. I should have felt happy for that, but I also felt alone.

Then, I found him on the opposite side of the second floor corridor, asleep in a long wooden bed. I was tired and I didn't trust my vision, so I closed the door quietly and walked to the only bed that was being used by a patient. All the other beds were empty. At the foot of the bedstead, I couldn't move for a moment. Even with large white bandages wrapped around his head, his bottom lip, red and swollen, and a cut that was stitched up just above his eyebrow, I couldn't have recognized Syaoran any better.

Tears came out involuntarily as I realized I was the cause of this. He too was connected to an IV and another large machine that continued to follow a steady beep. His face was pale and I couldn't stop myself from going to his side, weakly standing.

"Sy-syaor…an" I pushed out the words. I'd never seen him as vulnerable as he was now. A part of me wanted to punch him myself. Why had he been so stubborn? Another part of me wanted him to wake up and tell me he was going to be okay so I could stop the silent tears that were falling down my face. "D-dummy." I whispered.

His face tightened and I watched as he twitched slightly in his sleep. Slowly, I moved my fingers and touched the small stitched cut; next, touching his swollen lip.

_Sorry. _

I wanted to stay with him through the night. I wanted to be the first person he saw when he woke up, but I didn't know if I could survive the night if I didn't get some rest. I felt like any strength that I had a few minutes ago had vanished. My head throbbed and the images around me grew dizzy. All my energy had be spent while looking for Syaoran and I hadn't felt the fatigue until I had actually located him.

As I waited for my vision to clear itself again, a warm hand wrapped around my wrist and pulled me down onto Syaoran's mattress. Finally, I was able to see and immediately I locked eyes with Syaoran. His eyes were warm and comforting as he pulled my hand to his side farthest from me. I pushed myself off him slightly, so my weight wouldn't be concentrated on him. His smile was weak.

I wanted to ask if he was hurt, but I couldn't push the words out of my mouth.

He made a throaty sound and loosened his grip on my wrist. His strength was incredibly weaker than what it usually was. "Sorry, you're probably still hurt."

I clenched my teeth to stop a sob. His eyes were tired.

"I'm glad I didn't come too late." he whispered, smiling kindly. "Why aren't you in your own room?"

I just shook my head in a painful motion. I couldn't speak, but I reached up to wipe away my tears. Seeing even a weak smile on his once lifeless body made me happy.

"Why are you crying?" he asked. He paused to just look at me. His body relaxed as he stared at me. After a time, he completely released my wrist and averted his eyes from me. "Go back to your room Sakura. Go rest."

I looked at him, puzzled. I didn't want to leave him now that he was awake. I had hoped he would have allowed me to remain with him. I just hadn't been prepared for his abrupt words. Was he worried about me, or did he want to distance himself from me? Silently, I leaned my head onto his chest. "H…hold on." I coughed. "D-don't mo-ove." I requested. I stayed there for a few seconds, closing my eyes and breathing Syoaran's scent. I had thought I wouldn't be able to see him again for three years, but he had appeared when I was in trouble. It didn't mean he would always be there when I needed his help. When he would be in America, it would be permanent. I wondered if he knew how useless is was to save me now when he wouldn't be able to save me in the future. I wished his arms would go around me, pulling me closer to him. But I didn't dare look at him.

_Whenever he would turn his cold look on me, I always felt like I was the one being tossed aside._

"W-why did you come b-back?" I asked hoarsely. He didn't answer.

I sniffled and I thought I felt his arms tighten around me for a moment's time, but it was gone in an instance. Nevertheless, my grip tightened on the shirt he was wearing.

_Syaoran, I'm so sorry!_

Just as I opened my eyes, I thought I saw a look of deep pain in his eyes. He hadn't specified when he would be leaving, but I knew it would be as soon as possible.

"I'm sorry." I couldn't help but whisper once again. Syaoran knew what had happened in the past now. He understood what had separated us. I imagined he wanted revenge, but I thought the two of us also knew that many people didn't support our relationship now more than ever.

_But I didn't want Syaoran to push me away just because of that. Because if he had asked me to end our friendship at that moment, I would have nodded and left him alone. As long as it made him happy._

I forced myself to my feet and awkwardly took hold of my I.V stand. I felt so weak. "G-good-nigh-ight." I whispered. The pressure at the bottom of my throat made the pain I felt while breathing all the more intense. I couldn't meet his gaze.

"Sakura."

I strained to look back. Syaoran was sitting up. My heart clenched in fear of what he would say.

"I'm going to catch my flight the day after tomorrow. Would you come…" he seemed hesitant. "see me off?"

I nodded.

_Oh. Was that all? Inside myself, I suspected that Syaoran was putting distance between us so the good bye wouldn't be so hard on me. He wasn't the person to want the distance for himself._

* * *

Heh. I hope you guys didn't think Syaoran was being too cold to Sakura...AND sappy wasn't exactly what I was getting at. Emotional and maybe disheartening yeah, but not in anyway corny...maybe I've read it over too many times for my own good? I'll leave it up to you to decide. So thank you for all you people supporting this story and prepare yourselves for Syaoran's really goodbye next time. Your reviews were really nice last time too! Well at least better than normal... haha, thanks very much! 

(I wanted Saku and Syaoran to be kinda awkward after the incident. Did you guys see that they both have no idea whatthe other personis thinking? Well mainly Sakura doesn't know what Syaoran's thinking!)

-silent wanderer


	8. Chapter 8

Heh, a little TOO tardy with this one. I'm sorry everyone! I just haven't had the time. But I got this one out as soon as I could. Sorry! Please enjoy. I added a little bit of the next chapter in this one, just because I felt like it did the story more good to put it together with this chapter. Or maybe I'm just crazy...hahah anywho, thanks for the reviews and if you're still a little confused, I'll explain everything soon! Thanks!

Oh yeah, you guys don't think Syaoran's psycho do ya? I don't want to make it look like he has a crazy temper...he's justsupposed to just be impulsive...

* * *

_Oh. Was that all? Inside myself, I suspected that Syaoran was putting distance between us so the good bye wouldn't be so hard on me. He wasn't the person to want the distance for himself._

* * *

**Part VIII**

The sun was beginning to set as Syaoran came to my door. Earlier, the nurses had told me I was fit to go back home, but it was better if I didn't try to speak so soon. I was given a new set of clothing I didn't recognize and my dress and old shoes were given to me in a blue paper bag with corded handles. I suspected that Syaoran had bought the clothes himself and had told one of the nurses to give them to me.

When I saw Syaoran, I gave him a warm smile. His head was still bandaged and another small white bandage dressed the right side of his jaw. He looked somwhat irritated as if he wanted to tear them off.

The airport wasn't very far and I convinced Syaoran that I was healthy enough to walk. He reluctantly believed me, but kept an sharp eye on me the whole way there. After a while, my curiosity got the better of me and I had to ask about the day before.

"Syaoran?"

"What?"

"How did you know?"

"I saw through the television set. Stop talking moron."

"No." I whispered. "H-how did you know where I was?"

"I guessed."

"I don't believe you."

He sighed and I thought he answered truthfully so I would stop straining my voice. "I had someone follow you after I left to make sure you got home okay. You were just at my party and I thought some news journalists might have noticed you. He told me where you were."

"You had m-me followed?" I couldn't tell if he was being particularly hostile because we were about to part or because he was building up the nerve to say good bye.

He glanced down at me with a superior air. "You should be glad I did. Normal people would be thankful. Geeze."

But even as I was suspicious to what Syaoran was planning to do with our relationship, he had not of yet said anything to me about ending our friendship, so I didn't say anything back.

I had to hide my smile as we walked. Halfway there Syaoran's hand brushed past mine and clutched it gently. I didn't know why such a small act managed to make me happy, but it did. I'd always admired other couples unconscious affections towards each other.

"The police…" he started suddenly. "they haven't caught that guy yet. He might hurt you again."

"I know." I answered.

"Don't look like that." he said coldly. "You make it sound like you're giving up. What's your problem? You better start being more careful from now on. I won't be here to protect you and if you get hurt…" his face grew serious. "Maybe it would be better if I stayed here. Mother can-"

_He was still talking about staying back with me._

"No." I smiled into Syaoran's face. "I'd feel guilty if you stayed here with me just because you're worried. I'll be careful and I'll be here when you come back. Don't worry about me." I continued to give reassuring smile. "You can trust me."

He stared at me. "You're not very persuasive you know." a sceptical look danced on his features.

"I don't have to be." I answered. "Y-you should be able to go and know that I'll be here when you come back. I promised d-didn't I?"

He changed the direction of the conversation. "You know who that person was who attacked you. Don't you?"

I was surprised by his accusation, but I had a hard time lying to him. "Yes." I whispered simply. "I don't want to say who it was though, so don't bother asking. When you leave…I-I'm planning to speak to him later."

"What?" Syaoran blew up at this point. "Are you stupid! That's it, I'm staying here with you. Damn, I leave you here, you'll end up killing yourself before the three years are up."

"I don't think he'll hurt me this time."

"The hell he won't. What's wrong with you? Do you actually think it's safe to go and see him now? Bastard…He admitted to ploughing me down. I'm going to wring his neck."

I looked up at Syaoran. "I don't want to tell you who he is."

He narrowed his eyes at me. "The hell you don't. I'll kill him for what he did."

"That's why you can't come."

He eyed me with bottled anger. "And you're okay with him running your boyfriend over like that?"

My breath caught for a time. This was the first time Syaoran had referred himself as my boyfriend, never mind anyone else. I had to look away to hide my blush. "It's not like that." I mumbled. I pulled on his hand, but he didn't release mine. "I-if you really want to come, you'll miss your flight again."

"I'll catch the later one." he answered immediately.

"But, it's such a waste of money! What a waste Syaoran!" I couldn't imagine having so much money to spare.

He didn't budge.

I continued to look anywhere but him. "Fine." I frowned, thinking it would have been better if I hadn't told him at all. "You h-have to promise you won't k-kill him."

He didn't answer.

"Well?" I shook his hand.

"Fine, whatever, let's just go already. I don't know what the hell your problem is. After what he did to you, I'd want to do anything but protect him."

I kept quiet as we changed directions.

"You should really stop blushing like that." he said softly from behind me.

I jumped at the sound. "Blush?"

"Yeah. It makes me want to pull you over and kiss you."

* * *

At the door of the house, Syaoran stepped in front of me. "Let me go first." 

"Syaoran, you promised."

"So? I know what I said. I swear if he makes one wrong move…"

I sighed as I pushed the doorbell. He pushed back in front of me and I hit him with my elbow to push him back. It went back and forth like this until a pretty girl with blue hair opened it. Her eyes widened in surprise when she saw the two of us. She stared at Syaoran's bandaged wounds.

Syaoran himself didn't seem to recognize the girl. "We need to speak to someone in this house. Your brother I assume."

"He's not home a-at the moment." she answered, redirecting her stare to the ground.

My heart went out for the young girl. I nudged Syaoran away from her. "We'll come back later. Please tell him that Sakura really wants to speak to him."

"This was a dumb idea…" Syaoran mumbled behind me.

"Hey!" A voice called from inside the house. "I told you to not-" Then, a young man with a voice I was so familiar with emerged and froze as soon as he spotted the two of us. More importantly, his gaze was fixed on Syaoran.

I suppressed my anger just remembering what he had done. "I need to speak with you."

Syaoran scoffed from behind me, with so much control that I was surprised. "So much for not being home."

The man was genuinely surprised. "How…I didn't tell you who I was." he took a step forward and his sister stopped him.

"I knew who you were talking about yesterday. I recognized Tomoyo-chan."

Tomoyo didn't say anything and her brother sighed when he glanced at her. "What the hell do you want? Second time you got away you know…damn pisses me off." he looked at Syaoran as he said that.

I had to physically ward Syaoran away from attacking him. "Please, I just want to talk. We'll leave after."

"Well I'd invite you in…" he started with a twisted smile.

Syaoran scoffed. "Why would we want to go in anyways! We're not that stupid."

"S…syaoran!" I motioned him to stop talking and wasn't sure if he did because he actually felt bad or because he noticed how much it hurt me to raise my voice. Either way, he glared at me before turning to look away with irritation. "We want to end everything. I think this whole grudge doesn't have any meaning to it. What's done is done and I… want us to be able to get on with our lives."

"Tch. What I wanted to finish isn't finished yet. You're stupid for not telling the police who I was."

"You and me both." Syaoran grumbled childishly behind me.

"But why can't you just let the past go? I don't understand." I turned to Tomoyo. "Tomoyo-chan…you can't really want things to go on."

She watched me with an unreadable expression.

"Tomoyo-chan..." I pleaded kindly. "I know you don't want to hurt anyone. You've never physically hurt anyone before."

She failed to answer.

"Of course she wants it to go on!" the man behind her finally yelled. "She's always thought of you as dirt." He turned to Syaoran. "Do you remember Tomoyo, Li? How you rejected her so easily."

Syaoran shrugged. "I suppose."

I wanted to hit Syaoran for being so insensitive.

Tomoyo looked up at Syaoran for the second time since she had opened the door.

"Well she's getting revenge now. She used to tell me how special you were Li. What garbage! She even felt jealous of you." he looked down at me. "She won't stop until she gets revenge. Stupid." he chuckled. "Once Li leaves, I wonder how you'll protect yourself."

"Kamui, stop."

All three of us looked at Tomoyo in surprise. I waited, a soft smile fell on my lips and I felt hopeful with her intrusion. "Tomoyo-chan…"

"It's okay Kamui. Maybe we should stop bothering them." she placed a hand on his arm.

"What?…" her brother, Kamui was aghast as he processed his sister's words. "After all this? You can't-" he didn't finish. He wasn't able to.

"Tch. Pathetic." Syaoran's voice rang behind me. When I glanced back at him, his eyes were hard. "Did I really mean that much to you if you're going to even think of hurting someone I care about that easily? What a load of crap. Don't come up with all this junk of being rejected because if you really wanted to pursue me, you would have done it on your own. When you love someone you don't depend on others to win that love for you. Even yesterday when you captured Sakura, that was done by your brother, not you. It doesn't make sense." he looked down at Tomoyo with aged eyes, as if he was in a way, parting with advice.

Tomoyo stared at Syaoran in surprise and I admired Syaoran as I looked up at him then. It was funny how his stupidity and childishness held such meaning at times.

"We'll stop." she said after some time. "Please, if you must tell the police anything, tell them it was my fault." she stopped her brother from interrupting. "We're sorry." she paused. "I'm sorry."

I could see the tears forming in Tomoyo's eyes and I knew she had never meant for it to go this far. Part of me also knew that most of the plans to hurt both me and Syoaran hadn't been hers, but rather her brothers. She must have been coerced to believe that hurting the two of us was what she really wanted.

_I truly wanted to believe Tomoyo was a kind person._

The front door closed without another word and I was glad that I understood Tomoyo more. I would've liked to be her friend.

"Hey, how long are you going to stand there? It's starting to get dark."

I gave a satisfied smile as I turned to Syaoran, jumping down the steps. It was over. I trusted Tomoyo.

He gave me a disgusted look. "You're really unrefined you know."

"Unrefined?" I questioned.

"Yeah. People expect the heir to the corporation to marry a lady, not a commoner like you."

"Yeah well, who said I wanted to marry you?" I stuck my tongue out indignantly.

"Sure, sure. You'll understand when I'm in America." he continued walking, his hands in his pockets.

"I'll understand what?"

"How depressed you'll be without me of course."

I made a face. "It's not right to just assume that."

He just smiled as he looked ahead. "You might not be, but I will." he said.

"Wha?…" I glanced at him, biting my bottom lip to stop it from trembling. Why did he always have to be so simple? Whenever he had something to say, he always came out and said it.

"Are you crying?" he asked, slightly shocked. When I ducked and shook my head, he sighed and walked on. "I don't get you sometimes."

I linked my hand back in his. "I'm really happy you're okay Syaoran. I was so worried that day. I didn't really think you'd come back for me."

"You're speech didn't help any you know." he said bluntly. "What a total dumbass. If he didn't want me to return, he shouldn't have even placed that television set in the jet. He was asking for it. Like he didn't know I wouldn't come back for you."

"W-why did you come back for me?"

He smiled down at me. "You don't know? You really don't know?"

I blushed. "I have an idea…" I laughed softly. "It's because you wanted to show him that we are best friends right? No matter what he would do to us."

Syaoran's face twitched slightly. "Something like that…" he shook his head in what looked like disbelief. "Best friends…" he muttered.

I shrugged. "Don't worry, I think he got the hint."

My words only seemed to get another groan from him, so I gave up in trying to make Syaoran happy. _What did he want me to say! _

I rubbed at me eyes. "Sorry for keeping you. Your flight's probably going to be a really late one. I hope you're not too tired tomorrow."

"Nah, someone as great as me won't tire out so easily."

I laughed a little through my choked voice. "Aren't you usually pampered? It's going to be different when you take over your corporation."

"I know." he answered. "I'll be treated even better."

I couldn't hide my amusement as I caught up to him. "You're hopeless!" I stopped to think for some time. "Hey Syaoran?"

"What?"

"You haven't opened my present yet have you?"

"Not yet. Why?"

"Huh? Oh nothing. I was just curious."

"What is it? It's pretty small, but it's heavy. I was about to open it when I saw the television set." he breathed out an air of irritation. "Hey, let's just get one thing straight. You might trust those two back there, but I don't and since I'm not going to be around, you better grow paranoid."

"Para…noid?" I looked up at him as if he had grown horns from his head.

"That's right." he said a matter-of-factly. "Don't trust anyone, don't make friends with anyone and don't help anyone who seem like they need it."

"Uhhh…."

"Hey are you listening to me?" Syaoran reached out to conk me on the head. "If you listen to me, I won't have to get a bodyguard to follow you around."

I blinked. "What!" I cried. "I won't fall for the same trick the next time. I'm not stupid like you!"

"I'm stupid!" he yelled back. "You should be grateful I actually care!"

"You care a too much! Anyways, they said they wouldn't do anything to us again and I believe them."

"What? How can you believe them! Damn, you're so gullible! Stupid!"

"Tch. I'm stupid?" I grumbled under my breath. "You shouldn't be judging me."

"Eh? What did you say?" he asked arrogantly.

I didn't say anything, fastening my pace and entering the airport door, making sure it closed right in front of Syaoran's face just behind me. I turned and gave him a glare before turning back around.

_His timing was perfect. Making me angry...right before he left too._

He seemed genuinely surprised by my attitude and his face held a look of confused bewilderment and guilt all mixed together. It was awhile until I heard him awkwardly push past the door and run up to me.

"Neh Sakura, are you…" he stopped when I turned to look at him, narrowing my eyes. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

I ignored him and kept walking to the lobby where I would see him off. Syaoran had to stop and take a detour to the reception table in order to buy a new flight ticket as his original flight had already taken off. He seemed reluctant to leave me.

"Sakura!…" he stopped again when I failed to acknowledge him. From the corner of my eyes I could see his slight puzzlement and because of it, his anger was starting to build. It was like watching a child not understanding why he was being punished and throwing a tantrum. I watched in disbelief as he ignored the line up, pushing himself to the front and glaring at anyone who had something to say about it. "A ticket for flight 105!" he stated, the others behind him causing an uproar of complaints.

By now, I had spun around to watch the scene.

"I'm sorry sir, but you'll have to wait." the receptionist indicated to the end of the line, though she could hardly hold her blush while viewing Syaoran. "Please take a number."

"Yeah, move it buddy! You're holding up the line." An older man yelled from behind him.

"Move it! We all need tickets too. You aren't the only one!"

"Do you understand Japanese boy? Someone call security!"

I shook my head in amazement. The thought that he had called me stupid was entirely ironic.

Syaoran's palm shook against the marble desk and then his body began to shake. He was laughing. "Do you know who I am?" he asked the receptionist in a soft deadly voice. "Let me ask you again. Give-me-my-ticket."

A man who had had enough placed a hand on Syaoran's shoulder. "Hey, I don't give a damn who you are, just get in line."

Syaoran grew tense and he tilted his head at the man. "Please remove your hand." he asked as respectfully as he could.

The man smiled and gave Syaoran a rough push. "Look at that head. You look bruised up enough already. Don't try my patience, now get lost."

"Bruised am I?" Syaoran's lip curved up to one side.

I started to open my mouth to stop Syaoran, but he was too fast. He grabbed the man's hand and spun around, punching him hard on the jaw.

A woman screamed nearby and security made their way to Syaoran. He punched the first officer to the floor when he roughly grabbed his arm. When the second officer came to restrain him, Syaoran's smile grew larger. "Is it that hard to buy a ticket here?" he emphasized his meaning with his arms, sounding like a madman. "You." he ran his hand through his hair. "I see you recognise me." he smirked when the officer remained silent. "Good. Get me a ticket for flight 105 would you?"

"R-right away Li-san." the officer went to the receptionist, ignoring his partner on the ground and whispered something into her ear. Her eyes widened and her hand flew to her mouth. I was surprised to see her blush deepen.

Within seconds the entire line-up went silent and even those attacked by Syaoran stopped complaining when they got to their feet. I couldn't believe my eyes. Their accusations had stopped altogether and they now watched Syoaran in silent awe.

"Here you go, master Li. Please enjoy your flight."

Syaoran sighed as he took the thin, folded paper in his fingers. When he turned to look at me with his superior air, I was slightly unsure of what was going through Syaoran's head at that moment. So I returned his arrogant stare, raising my chin and glaring at him with contempt. Turning away from him, I continued to the lobby.

"He punched the man because he grabbed him…" I grumbled under my breath, continuing to pretend I was furious.

His intimidating act didn't make me want to forgive him.

But that's what his simple mind must have thought because he quickly retreated back to being puzzled and confused. His plan hadn't worked. He called after me again with hesitation. "Sakura!…" he pushed awkwardly away from those beginning to crowd him for attention and any sign of his previous arrogance had quickly vanished.

I wondered how anyone could be turned on and off that easily.

I knew I was managing to make him uncomfortable and I stopped abruptly when I reached the area where the ones seeing off the passengers were all settled. I could tell Syaoran was following me closely and his clothing brushed against me when I stopped. I turned to glare at him and he looked down at me with an innocent expression. I took to leaning next to the nearest pillar, crossing my arms.

He looked at me looking more frustrated. "Eh, Sakura. Why are you in-" I didn't hear the rest as the PA went on and drowned out his voice.

"Would the passengers of flight 105 please present their tickets at toll 16. I repeat, would the passengers of flight 105 please present their tickets at toll 16 at this time."

I pointed my finger at toll sixteen. "You better get going."

"You!…" he said, almost insistently. If he was sorry, it didn't show. He looked like he was about to strangle me. "If this is about the stupid comment, you were calling me stupid too." he blushed as he looked down at me. "What's wrong with caring too much for the person you like?"

His words were softening my heart, so I was glad when we were intruded.

"Sakura-chan! Li!"

I looked up and saw Eriol calmly approaching us. His smile was a lot more welcoming than Syaoran's scowl, but it turned to a frown as he stopped beside us.

"What's wrong with your head?" he asked Syaoran.

"Huh?" he said dumbly, as if he was slightly dazed. His hand flew to his bandaged head. "Oh…yesterday when I was with…" he looked at me sheepishly. "Sakura…" he averted his gaze, placing both hands in his pockets when I glared back at him. "If you came to visit me you would have known why stupid!" he crossed his arms and took his anger out on Eriol.

"I see." Eriol tilted his head to see mine more closely. "Well I came to visit **you** yesterday Sakura-chan, but you were asleep. Are you okay now?"

"I'm fine." I answered pleasantly. "My voice isn't as strong yet." I was almost surprised Syaoran didn't have a comment to say to my words. I looked back at him. "You should say good bye to Li, Eriol-kun. We're keeping him from his flight." I smiled triumphantly when Syaoran seemed taken aback by what I called him.

"Oh." Eriol said, turning to Syaoran. "Is that why you're still here?" he gave a wave. "Bye bye." It seemed that Eriol was playing along with my plan.

A vein in Syaoran's jaw jumped and I half expected for him to start yelling and making a scene. Instead his gaze lingered on me as if hoping I would say something. When I didn't he said a bad-tempered "Fine." and turned to walk away.

I took a deep breath and when he was halfway to the toll, I was about to open my mouth to stop him, but Eriol placed a hand on my shoulder to stop me. I looked up at him and he gave me his knowing smile, winking and placing a slender finger on his lips. I nodded, not fully understanding what he meant until Syaoran was almost three quarters onto the platform.

He spun ferociously around. "I'm sorry! I won't have you followed!" he cried loud enough so everyone turned to stare. He gave a flustered look as his hand awkwardly went to brush his hair. After staring at the ground for a few seconds, he lifted his gaze to meet mine. "I promise to trust you."

"Oh." I answered, wondering how far I could take this. "Then I guess I should say, have a nice flight." I even gave a small wave.

I could see he wanted to make a loud sound of frustration, but he was able to stop himself. He was now more confused than ever. "Sakura." he entreated one last time, his face, un-amused.

I smiled and he looked up at me in curiosity. Upon viewing my grin, he seemed somewhat relieved.

I dropped my bag and he came back to me.

"Dummy." I smiled. "Who uses their corporation name to get what they want?"

"I told him to let go." he said innocently.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry. I really wasn't that angry. You're just funny to look at when your upset." I laughed at his unamused frown. Finally, I took a deep breath for my next words. "I wanted to tell you before that I…"

He stared at me, expectantly and I glanced at Eriol who smiled at me with a smirk.

Syaoran looked at me and then at Eriol, then back to me. "Why are you looking at him for?" he shot Eriol a dirty look and Eriol glared at him back.

I shook my head, pushing Syaoran away. "I can tell you on the phone."

Syaoran couldn't hide his frown. "I want to hear it now."

"But-" his stubborn jaw made me stop. I needed to tell him. I sighed. Yanking his arm, I pulled him just behind a pillar. He seemed entirely confused.

"Why can't Eriol hear?" he asked like a child.

I shook my head.

"Why are you blushing like that?"

I clenched my fist to my side. I took a deep breath and looked up at him. "I love you Syaoran." I felt lighter after saying it and when he didn't say anything, I looked up into his face.

He blinked as he looked down at me and I could tell that he was astonished by my declaration. "Did you just say…" he dived in for a quick kiss and then smiled warmly into my face. "I'm happy you said it."

His smile tugged at a sensitive spot in my heart. Only Syaoran seemed capable of reaching it.

"Say it again." he asked, almost greedily.

I blushed. "Again? But saying it again takes out the meaning." I gave a hesitant smile, looking back up at Syaoran. The words would anger him, I knew that.

His vein jumped again. "You snotty brat, what the hell-" but was cut off again.

"Last call, Would the passengers of flight 105 please arrive to booth 16 immediately. Passengers of flight 105 to booth 16 immediately. Last call."

I swallowed. "You better go."

He studied me, but didn't say anything.

"Hey, if you stare at each other any longer even the plane won't wait for the son of the Li corporation." Eriol peered from behind of the pillar as if he had been standing there the whole time.

"Did…you hear?" I asked.

Syaoran glared at me, pulling me closer to him. "Who cares if he hears? This isn't a secret!" his coldness dissipated quickly as he waved Eriol over. "Eriol, guess what, guess what? Sakura said she-"

I elbowed him in the stomach.

Eriol just smiled. "You better go." he patted Syaoran lightly on the back. "Come back soon okay?"

Syaoran gave a nod. "I'll be back." he said and smirked. "Don't miss me too much."

I could tell how much Syaoran valued their friendship by their small moment. Syaoran valued his friendships above all else.

"I won't. Take care of yourself." Eriol smiled. "Don't worry, I'll take of Sakura-chan for you."

"You better." he gave me a look and finished what he was saying in a whisper behind his hand. I wanted to wring Syaoran's neck, as I was pretty sure I knew what he was saying.

Syaoran nodded and pulled Eriol's cap down over his eyes. "I'm letting you take care of her, but you can't touch her. And try looking at her as little as possible too."

"Then how am I supposed to know when she's in trouble?" Eriol asked in a smirk.

I smiled at the two. If my eyes hadn't deceived me, I not only heard Syaoran sniffle involuntarily, but saw his eyes glaze over. "Try not to be too bored without me." he said hoarsely to his Eriol.

"Of course not." Eriol answered, solemnly.

Syaoran looked down at me one last time and placed a kiss on the crown of my head. "I love you, Saku."

The last thing I saw was a blurry vision of Syaoran's figure vanishing into the crowd.

"I love you!" I screamed, though my throat didn't let me hear the end of it later. I wished I could have seen Syaoran's face.

_He didn't turn around, but I'm sure he heard me._

* * *

**Part IX**

Eriol had taken me to the private balcony in order to see Syaoran's flight off. I waved with everything I had as I thought I had spotted Syaoran's profile from one of the airplane's windows. The view of the take off was quite close.

"Syaoran!" I waved. "Good bye!" he didn't seem to notice me and I sighed in defeat.

"Don't worry Sakura-chan. He already knows how you feel."

I blushed. "Oh…you did hear…"

"Hm hmm." he gave a mischievous smile. "I remember you saying something earlier about being happy for Li. That was a fast change of mind."

"I'm still happy for him." I retorted. "It was him who was acting like the world was going to end. I mean who gets that happy when someone tells them they like them?"

Eriol didn't say anything as he leaned down and touched the spot on my head where Syaoran had kissed me. "I could wipe off his kiss right now if you want."

"How are you going to do that?" I asked, even then slightly protective of the Syaoran's kiss.

"Here." Eriol leaned in towards me and my eyes widened. I shut my eyes and fended him off.

"Would the man with the red scarf and the name of Hiragizawa Eriol keep his filthy hands off the young girl by the name of Kinomoto Sakura. I repeat would the man with the name Hiragizawa Eriol keep his filthy hands off Kinomoto Sakura."

The two of us froze as the announcement came on. Both our eyes darted to the airplane window at the same time and I could only shake my head in disbelief as I faintly made out the irritated expression on Syaoran's face. In his hand was a cell phone that he was barking words into.

"That guy…" Eriol took a step from me and put his hands up to show Syaoran he meant no harm. "has eyes like a hawk." he laughed.

I couldn't stop from laughing either. How he had been able to contact the airport was beyond me, but even more amazing was the fact that the person in charge had actually delivered his message.

"Look, they're starting to move."

My heart beat faster as the airplane started down the runway. "Syaoran!" I screamed, waving with everything I had. "Come back soon! Good-bye! I'll wait so take care of yourself! Syaoran!"

The last image I had of him, was a sad smile and a short wave.

_Three years until he would come back. _

_This was day one._

* * *

Huh. Well I could really just end it here couldn't I? I wonder what I should do... 


	9. Chapter 9

Well everyone, this is part one of the last chapter of stray memories. I had to split it up because it was getting so long and I kept adding things in. The final final chapter will be up this same week, so hopefully you'll look out for it. If you still have questions after this, I would be glad to answer them back as quickly as I can. Thank you very much for all your comments and reviews. Perhaps in the future you will take a look back at this little story of mine. I enjoyed writing it very much and your support has been amazing. Arigato!

_**Stray Memories**_

**Part IX**

My heart beat faster as the airplane started down the runway. "Syaoran!" I screamed, waving with everything I had. "Come back soon! Good-bye! I'll wait so take care of yourself! Syaoran!"

The last image I had of him, was a sad smile and a short wave.

_Three years until he would come back. _

_This was day one._

* * *

Eriol offered to walk me home and even insisted for my consent as he had promised Syaoran. Finally, I relented. At the gate of my house however, I couldn't hold in my curiosity any longer. I turned back just as my hand was reaching for the gate. "What exactly did Syaoran tell you?" 

Eriol's placed a long finger on his lips. "Secret." he murmered, beginning to walk away. The act reminded me slightly of Syaoran and a pang of emotion bloomed inside my chest. I watched Eriol take a few steps and then stop. I thought he had changed his mind about telling me. Instead, without looking at me he said "Take a look at your mailbox later today would you?" and then he kept going down the street.

I frowned. "The mailbox?" I walked directly to it and lifted the lid, taking out the small envelope inside. It was addressed to me with distinct handwriting. Eriol had told me to take a look at the letter later that day, but I knew there was no doubt in his mind that I would look at it immediately. My predictability unnerved me. I decided to wait until opening it. A part of me wondered what Eriol had put inside the envelope, but I was already too exhausted from the day. My throat hurt and I knew I would get quite the lecture from Touya as soon as I entered the house. He had always been protective.

"Sakura-chan."

I looked up in surprise. "Tomoyo-chan?" she was the last person I thought I would see that day.

She gave a small bow. "It's really not my place, but I just wanted to see how you were doing. Are you hurt badly?"

I walked down the steps to Tomoyo. "No. I'm fine really. And I meant what I said Tomoyo-chan. I won't reveal who was behind everything."

"Thank you." she sniffled. "Kamui promised he would leave you and Li-san alone."

I was somewhat shocked to see tears form from the corners of her eyes. I smiled sympathetically. "Neh Tomoyo-chan, let's be friends from now on okay?" I placed a hand on her shoulder.

She nodded behind her tears, smiling. "I'm sorry, Sakura-chan. Sorry for what I did in the past."

I looked at her carefully. She was really apologizing for things she didn't do and it made me smile to think of what Syaoran would say to her if he had overheard. I however, didn't despise the word 'sorry'.

"Un hmm." I shook my head. "Let's forget about our past. We'll make new memories starting from now on."

_Back then, I had used the exact words to Syaoran because they were the truth. Now, I wanted Tomoyo to have the chance to start over too._

_**One year later**_

Touya cackled at his last comment as he flipped restlessly through the magazine he was looking at. His body was stretched on the sofa and as I brought a tea tray over to him, he sat up and pointed to a picture in the magazine. "Hey isn't this your boyfriend?"

I placed the tray down. The thought of Syaoran made my head go light headed. The first year hadn't gone by fast enough and I'd begun to realize just how difficult it would be to get through the next two years. What surprised me at that moment was that Syaoran had actually allowed himself to be on a magazine. "Let me see." my interest however lessened dramatically when I saw who Touya was pointing to. "That's not my boyfriend. I told you, he's just a friend. You know who Eriol is."

"Yeah, but I swear he looks different every time he appears in one of these things…" he smiled in bewilderment. "He also seems to discard more and more of his clothes every time he appears here too. He'll be nude soon."

As I reached for the magazine, he pulled away and gave me a stern look. "You sure have weird taste in friends Sakura. Are you sure you really like this gaki? I didn't like him when we were kids and now, he's just a bigger nuisance."

I frowned. "If you are referring to Syaoran, than you can stop it. Anyone can see that you like him."

Touya suddenly pretended to choke at my words. "What! I just said I was grateful he saved you okay? That doesn't mean I like him, or any body part of his thereof. Stupid brat, now he has something against me for the rest of my life."

"Because he saved my life." I half stated as a question, trying to make it obvious that Touya was being the stupid one.

"Damn straight." he answered. "I'll repay the debt one day and then we'll be on even ground again." He smirked. "Meaning I'll be above him again as we could never be on even ground." he laughed at my glare. "So if you're ever in trouble, let your big brother know first okay? I don't think I'll be able to handle that gaki having another thing to hold over my head ever again."

"You like him and you know it!" I rammed my foot down onto Touya's and snatched the magazine from his loosened fingers. "Anyways, Eriol has standards..." I took a closer look at the picture. There was no doubt that he was being slightly more free with his choice of clothing. He had on a tight pair of jeans, decorated with a flashy jewelled belt. He looked like he was at the beach. His feet were bare, his hair was flying in all directions and over his body draped an unbuttoned grey shirt, revealing in my opinion, quite a lot. My eyes bulged. "That guy…" I frowned, as I never supported Eriol's hobby. I knew he didn't need the money. The thought that he enjoyed modelling made me shudder. "No wonder all those girls smother him at school."

"Don't worry." Touya said, snatching back the magazine. "If you're one of those 'smotherers' I'm sure he won't be that interested."

"Don't say it…" I growled.

Touya couldn't hold it in. "It doesn't look like he'd go for little monsters like you."

I started to leave the room. "If I'm a monster, you're just a bigger one! We're related you know!" I yelled and went into my room, slamming the door with everything I had. The impact caused a small white envelope to fall from my dresser.

I froze. It had been a year since I had first looked into that mailbox.

_The letter_.

Everyday I told myself I would open it, but that always led to the next day. It was only later that I had learnt that it wasn't from Eriol, but was in fact, from Syaoran. It was from _my Syaoran... _and because it was, I wanted to be able to have something of his, in case there was one off day that I would feel too lonely. His small letter would keep me company.

For the past year, I had supressed all my thoughts of Syaoran during the day. I functioned as normally as I could and I never heard Syaoran's name brought up in the conversations I was in. I thought Eriol was one of the reason's why. Over time, I learned more about Syaoran indirectly through Eriol. Before, I hadn't gotten to know what kind of person Eriol really was, but since Syaoran's departure, Eriol had always gone out of his way to keep me company. Perceptive as he was, Eriol had always seen through my false expressions. I didn't like how he went out of his way in order to keep a smile on my face. His kindness was disheartening and it made me feel as if anything, I should be happy for him.

_I understood why Syaoran had chosen Eriol to be his friend so long ago._

But, the night wasn't like the day. At night, I didn't have Eriol around me. I was alone with my thoughts and it was then, I realized how useless it was to push my thoughts of Syaoran away. His eyes, warm, but holding that dangerous glint always managed to invade my thoughts. I was reminded of the heartwarming looks he would give me. And although I wanted to avoid the garden square, where I had first seen Li as Syaoran, I would sometimes find myself wandering back to the old swing. A year had barely passed and my heart ached with every passing second. I didn't even dare to think of the next two years ahead of me. I knew I had to hold out as long as I could before opening Syaoran's letter because if I read it too soon, I wouldn't have anything of his left when I felt even more alone.

It was silly really. I never imagined someone would want to be with someone else so much. That's why I stopped myself from thinking about Syaoran because I didn't want to bother anyone with my childish feelings. It made me wonder what emotions were going through Syaoran in America and whether he was feeling the same way I was. I had known three years was a long wait, but I didn't think about how a part of me had already grown to be so familiar and comfortable with Syaoran by my side. It was only then that I saw how unnoticed and necessary he had been for me.

I knelt down to the envelope and picked it up. My fingers trembled with anticipation as I turned the letter so the flap faced me. I took a deep breath as I was painfully careful while opening the envelope. I was determined to read it. Syaoran had probably intended for me to read it the day he left, but unintentionally, I hadn't. I had been held back, but at that moment, I pushed aside my fear of having nothing else of Syaoran's to hold onto after. I would after all, still have his words.

It was a simple sheet of paper, folded neatly into three sections. My eyes read the words.

_Sakura:_

_How are you? I guess you know why I was late that day. I'm writing this letter but I should go pick you up to go to the party. I want you to be able to read this after I leave for America. Eriol says he'll tell you about the letter immediately after seeing you safely home. But knowing you, some time's probably past and you're only opening it now. You brat…what if I had something important for you to do for me? It wouldn't have gotten done for days and days!_

_But it doesn't really matter when you read this. If you do I'll be happy. I didn't tell you earlier, but we probably won't have much conversations on the phone when I leave. Sorry. I don't know how things will go, but if I get the chance to write to you, I will. I'll send my own private messenger over too. When I come back, I'll even let you see my own private plane. You'd like that right? _

_Sakura. I'll really miss you…so phone me everyday okay? I know you'll want to no matter how much you deny it. But other than that, I want you to know that more and more of our memories are coming back Sakura. Maybe, one day, I'll be able to recall them all. For now I better go, before you get mad at me for being so late. Wait for me Saku._

_I want to see you._

_The person you most love, Li, Syaoran. _

I was unnerved at how ironic it was that in my attempt to not be predicatable, I had actually been even more predictable and had Syaoran guessing that I would be saving his letter. Nevertheless, I choked out a smile through my own tears as I read the last line. "Moron…" I whispered. "Who says you're the person I love most?" But I had to smile. He had written this before I had told him I loved him, which meant he had known my feelings for him even then.

Still clutching the letter, I reached for the phone, dialling in a number I knew so well.

_I wanted to hear his voice. I only hoped I wouldn't be met with disappointment again._

_**Two years later**_

"Don't wave to him Tomoyo. He has enough attention already." I tried to get Tomoyo's attention away from Eriol as we ate lunch together in the cafeteria. Tomoyo had transferred to Haru High just this year and I was more than happy to show her around. We had become good friends and I thought she was a better companion than Eriol, who really wasn't being a good companion at all. The women around him prevented any conversation we would have had.

I wasn't however, blind to Tomoyo's feelings. She liked Eriol.

"As a friend," I started, picking at my lunchbox. "I should warn you. Eriol is nice, but he isn't serious with his relationships. Don't get pulled in by his gentlemanly act Tomoyo."

"Sakura…didn't you use to like Eriol?"

I blushed. "No no no. It was just a little crush. I thought he was someone else."

"You thought he was Li-san?" Tomoyo smiled as if she knew something I didn't.

I didn't say anything for some time. It had now been two years. I liked to think that I had become used to Syaoran not being near me, but the memory of his smile still made my heart clench. My fists tightened at his name. I still didn't understand why just hearing it made me stiffen so easily. I even had to bite my tongue in order to stop the urge of crying. Since reading Syaoran's letter, a year ago, I hadn't heard from him again. He had been right. It was difficult for me to contact him and though I wrote a few letters to his address, I wasn't ever sure if he had properly received them because I was never at any point, given a reply.

"Sakura, I didn't mean to bring him up." Tomoyo's eyes widened. "What was I thinking?" she whispered under her breath. She smiled warmly in a genuine effort to cheer me up. "Here, I baked these this morning just for you. Want to have the first taste?"

I looked at Tomoyo. I was doing just that. I was pulling my friends into my grief and I wanted to hit myself. "Sorry. I wasn't thinking about Syaoran." I lied, stopping myself from doing just that. I consoled myself that Syaoran wasn't one to forget about his past so easily.

_And that made me want to believe that he hadn't forgotten about me._

Tomoyo looked skeptical.

My mind raced. "I didn't exactly think Eriol was Syaoran." I laughed nervously. "Where are you getting these ideas from Tomoyo? You've been talking too much with Eriol. Anyways, even if I had thought what you think I had thought, it was only because I thought Eriol could have been Syaoran that I even thought I liked him." I was babbling.

"Sakura-chan! That hurts!" Eriol slid into an empty chair at our table.

I flinched. This day was growing worse by the second. "You heard? I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry! You're very handsome Eriol."

Eriol ruffled my hair. "You said that to me once. I thought Sakura-chan was cute the first I saw her too."

I ignored Tomoyo's suspicious look and poked at my food with my chopsticks. "Oh…" I said lamely, hiding a blush.

He just laughed. "But, Li..." he studied me as if trying to see whether I was bothered by the topic. He must have thought I was fine because he continued. "he moved faster I suppose. I knew he was attracted to you the moment you crashed into him." Eriol smiled. "He's scary, but I saw it."

"Crashed into him?" Tomoyo echoed.

"I'll tell you later." I answered, trying to stop the conversation and salvage what little dignity I had left. But, I was unable to suppress one last question. "How did you know Eriol?"

Eriol chuckled softly, slightly amused by my question. "Remember that evil glare he has sometimes? He never directly gave it to you."

"Yes he did." I answered quickly back. "Everytime I approached him."

Eriol shook his head. "That's something else entirely. This look he only used to get rid of all the girls that approached him. You were the first one he only yelled at."

"Only yelled at?" I asked, wondering if that was better.

"Yep." he answered cheerfully, picking up his own pair of chopsticks. "I think...he liked your company even then. That's how I knew to leave you alone. He didn't know it, but if I didn't, he would have gotten a lot more angry without knowing why."

I blinked at his words. "More angry?" I wasn't sure if that would have been possible but I was starting to sound like an echo. Eriol certainly knew how to read Syaoran perfectly. I wondered if I was ever capable of doing the same. So I mentally reminded myself to ask Eriol for advice on how to read Syaoran's character even better, later that day. I didn't ever want to make Syaoran angry if I could have avoided it.

Tomoyo smiled. "You're a very good friend Eriol-kun."

Eriol turned to Tomoyo and smiled his kind smile. "Well we're good friends now aren't we Tomoyo-chan?"

"Yes." she answered without thinking.

I looked from her to him. The look on Eriol's face was dangerously luring.

"So from now on, you can just call me Eriol okay?" he leaned into my lunchbox and picked up a sushi roll.

Tomoyo couldn't hide a blush. "Hai." she answered, cheerfully.

I sighed. My advice had had no effect on her. I opened my mouth to question Eriol's intentions towards Tomoyo, but at that moment the entire cafeteria broke out in quiet whispers.

"There's some sort of package coming into the cafeteria."

"They say it's from Li-san!"

"No way! Isn't he supposed to be busy in America? What kind of package is it?"

"Is it a donation for the school?"

"Hmm, I wonder what this is about." Eriol asked, just under his breath.

I didn'y say anything. The day was definitely turning worse by the second. Why did Syaoran have to be everywhere? Everyday, his name was on someone's lips, his corporation on the television, his face on magazines and now his packages to my school. I wanted to leave the entire whispering room. How could I forget about him when every little aspect of him was surrounding me? A hard lump grew at the bottom of my throat.

_He was everywhere...everywhere, but by my side._

Eriol seemed completely puzzled and he stood to see the commotion. "Wonder what he's up to now." he turned to Tomoyo. "Did you hear about this Tomoyo?"

Tomoyo looked uneasy. "There was talk about it this morning in class, but the girls always gossip about Li. I didn't take them seriously."

I sat back in my chair and frowned as the rumours quieted down. Why did they have to make such a large commotion just because Syaoran was donating something to the school? It unnerved me however, that the school seemed to be the higher priority for Syaoran when compared to me. But just as I was about to take my lunch and leave, one individual cried "There's the deliverer coming now!"

My eyes widened as the whole entire cafeteria went silent. A man in a grey suit, came through the cafeteria doors, holding the largest bouquet of red roses I had ever seen. My mind flashed with the thought that he was approaching me. I waited for him to change his direction, but he came directly at me, kneeling just a few inches away. His gloved hands held out the bouquet in front of me. The fresh smell made me dizzy. I went to pick the man up.

Rising and saying his thanks, he gestured for me to take the bouquet. "These are for you Miss. Kinomoto."

"For me? Are you sure?" I asked, my heart beating rapidly. Was that the package everyone was talking about? My hands shook as a flash of Syaoran's face appeared in my thoughts. "Is there a card?"

"They are from Master Li. Freshly picked and ordered to be sent to you. Please."

Speechless, I took the bouquet. "Syaoran sent this?" I couldn't control my shaking limbs.

"Yes." he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small white card. "Here is the card attached." he gave a slight bow and I couldn't help but do the same.

"Good day Miss. Kinomoto. Master Li gives his regards."

It was a while before I could move. Even with the room being as crowded as it was, I couldn't have felt more alone. I stared at the man who had delivered me the flowers. He left through the courtyard doors from the balcony. My feet had half a mind to catch up with him and ask if he would take me to see Syaoran.

I didn't know how long I had been standing there when I felt a small shake on my arm. I looked down at Tomoyo's worried look. Eriol had a satisfied smile on his lips.

"Are you okay Sakura?"

"I-I'm fine." I looked a my friends gratefully. I couldn't control my voice for long however. "I'm going to go...drop my things off." and without looking back, I dashed off to the locker area.

* * *

I breathed out a shaky sigh when I reached my locker. I was glad to see it was empty because I felt emotionally unstable at that point. I leaned against my locker and awkwardly opened the card to read what was inside. 

_Sakura:_

_I tried phoning you last night, but you weren't home. Where were you? Stupid! You should have stayed in your room, waiting for my call. Was Eriol with you? It should have been dark in Japan when I phoned. You shouldn't be out at night. It made me worried. Plus you made it so I wasn't able to sleep so I went to our garden to pick these roses. The gardener said that the colour red would be suitable, but since I don't know much about flowers I believed him. Just in case though, I added a yellow, blue and white rose too. I hope you like them. I haven't had the time to write you a letter, so I sent this in my private jet. It arrived pretty fast huh? If you don't think so, feel free to express your anger towards the messenger._

_One more year Sakura. I want to see you again. _

_-Syaoran._

I looked at my present, completely unaware of anything else. Sure enough, there was an unmatched yellow, blue and white rose in the sea of red. Something felt like it was blocking my throat and I clutched the roses to my chest. I remembered back to last year when I had opened his first letter and had later tried phoning him. No one had picked up that day.

_Before I knew it, I was doubting whether you remembered me. _

_I'm sorry Syaoran.

* * *

_

I couldn't fall asleep that night. I knew I was being childish, but afterschool, I had sprinted home immediately in the event that Syaoran would try contact me again. The truth was, I hadn't been home to pick up his call the other night because I had taken a stroll to the old garden square.

I glanced at the clock on the small wooden dresser at the side of my bed. It was midnight and the moonlight was coming in through the balcony windows. I had waited all day, but Syaoran hadn't phoned. I didn't think he would be up this late and I highly doubted he would have called me just to speak with me at midnight. I was restless. I wondered when I had grown such irregular sleeping patterns. It must have been since the day Syaoran had gotten onto that plane to America.

Sighing, I decided it was best to stop thinking. I pulled my gaze off the phone and turned onto my side. My eyelids were growing heavy, but it was then that they caught bright flashes shining rythmically from my cell phone. It was portruding from my school bag. Leaning over my bed, I reached for the phone.

It was a text message. I smiled, looking forward to reading Eriol's kind words. It wasn't odd for him to send me a message this late. It had always made me wonder whether or not he knew I didn't sleep well during the nights.

I lay back down at my side and flipped open the phone cover. I couldn't think after I saw who it was from.

_**From**: Syaoran_

_**Topic**: Restless_

_Good night Sakura. _

_I'm thinking of you, so sleep well...

* * *

_

I typed my reply.

* * *

_**From:** Sakura_

_**Topic:** Still up_

_Good night Syaoran._

_Thank you for today._

I hit send and placed the phone down beside my pillow before falling asleep.

_**Three years later**_

_Sakura:_

_This is going to be the last letter I write to you. I won't expect any from you from here on in either. It's almost been three years hasn't it? I have to say, I'm a little relieved that this is finally going to end. Our time apart was nice. It made things clearer for me. I hope you're still the understanding person I knew three years before. You can forgive me for never replying to your letters right? Sorry. The corporation's been busy and I haven't had the time. It would be a waste for you to keep writing. I just wanted to say that I might not come back as planned. I'll try finding you if I do. _

_Give Eriol my regards. Goodbye._

_-Syaoran._

That was the first page to Syaoran's letter.

I looked up from the letter, not knowing what to think. My silence must have alarmed Eriol who was standing behind me, probably reading the letter over my shoulder. He gave a small push on the old garden swing I was sitting in. The abrupt movement woke me up from my thoughts and I looked at Eriol.

His expression was odd; a mixture of surprise and laughter. "Sakura, are you crying?"

I stared at him, but then quickly averted my eyes. "Stop it. I'm trying to read my letter."

He shrugged, grasped the swing's harness and I immediately stopped swinging. When I failed to continue reading however, he tugged the letter from my fingers and started reading out loud. I almost didn't want to hear. It was embarassing enough to read it alone, never mind have Eriol read it for me.

"I don't want to hear right now." I stopped him.

"Sakura..." he entreated. " Listen to the rest would you? There's probably an explanation."

I sighed and yanked the letter back. I frowned at what I read.

_HAHAHAHAHAHA!_

_Sakura, you better not be crying or anything. Don't you know by now that I have a way with words? I hope you didn't take my meaning wrong. I don't want you writing to me anymore because I'll be coming back to see you soon and so there's no need for you to. My flight might be later than I had originally thought. We're in the middle of signing a contract with one of our partnerships. So don't cry alright?_

_Anyways, I lied. I did take a look at your gift. It was the first thing I did in the limousine that day. I really liked it Sakura. It's our picture album from when we were kids right? You were cute then. It's nice to have something of our past. There's a few empty pages though. When I come back, I want to fill them up._

_Sakura. I should tell you, that day when I found out someone had kidnapped you, I thought I was going to go insane. You don't know how happy I was to see you that night in the hospital room. I wanted to keep you with me all night, but keeping you would have made it harder to say good bye again. Funny, but it hurt more than when I had allowed those idiots to beat me up._

_I have something to give you when I come back. Never begin to doubt I'd leave your side._

_-Syaoran_

I swallowed unevenly and even more unsteadly went to look back at Eriol.

His face was warm and knowing and his eyes were calm but laughing as he gazed back down at me. It was as if he knew all along what Syaoran had been doing.

I blinked when he waved a camera infront of my face. "I couldn't resist. I'll give you a copy of your expression." he laughed and before I could answer, he gave me a large push on the swing. I grabbed the harnesses, instinctively and looked back on Eriol's smiling face.

"Smile Sakura!"

_Eriol has always been there for the long three years I've waited for you Syaoran. I admire your ability to see the good in someone. _

_And after all this, please don't make me have to leave you._

_It's almost time for us to meet again.

* * *

_

- _And now whatever way our stories end  
I know you have re-written mine  
By being my friend._

-_For Good_ from the Broadway Musical _Wicked_


	10. Chapter 10

Once again, thank you so much for your support and I hope you enjoy the ending. To think, I actually finished something I started...

_**Stray Memories**_

**Part X**

My hands wouldn't stop shaking. I didn't remember the last time I had felt so excited. Today was the day Syaoran would return. I hadn't received a phone call, but instead, his secretary had phoned me the day before yesterday and told me when he would be arriving.

I couldn't stay still. At first, I walked around the area, but due to the crowd, I kept crashing into people. Plus, it may have been wishful thinking on my part, but I kept catching a faint lingering of expensive cologne in the air every time someone accidentally brushed past me. It reminded me of Syaoran.

After pacing for quite some time, I decided to go sit down and control my agitation. I sat in the waiting area along with Eriol and Tomoyo, not able to believe the size of the crowd that was awaiting Syaoran's return. It made me wonder how they had all found out.

But as soon as a reporter screamed out "There's the plane!" I forgot all about my thoughts.

Watching the landing from the glass window was impossible. Everyone who had someone important on the plane was pressed against it. I sighed and stayed where I was, wondering what Syaoran's reaction would be at seeing me. My heartbeat was racing and my eyes were permanently glued to the airport entrance where the passengers would come through.

"Sakura, you're really excited."

I turned to Tomoyo. "Really?" I laughed uneasily. "I hope he recognizes me."

She smiled sweetly. "You've ignored every word Eriol and I have said to you for the past hour. I'm glad to see you're so happy though."

I smiled. For the past three years, Tomoyo had become someone I cared very much for. And it was true. We did manage to make many memories over the few years. I shook my head. "Sorry. I guess I'm a little too excited."

"No, it's great." Tomoyo answered. "To love someone so much…I admire that so much. Keep it up Sakura. Li-san is probably excited too."

"A lot more excited." Eriol added, laughing as if he knew that was the truth. And if my eyes hadn't deceived me, I would have sworn that his eyes had flashed tenderly towards Tomoyo at her comment.

I smiled and nodded as I turned my attention back to the entering passengers. I couldn't believe my eyes when the last child ran through the doors. "Did you see him?" I asked.

The two individuals beside me shook their heads in unison.

I stood up then, hoping Syaoran would be able to see me. I was in disbelief. "We missed him..." I stated.

Eriol rose too, lifting his sunglasses off slightly to view the crowds. "The news reporters haven't spotted him yet either. They look as confused as us."

"But he was on this plane wasn't he?" Tomoyo frowned. "Perhaps he took his private jet?"

Realization hit me then. "That's right. In his letters he always mentioned his private jet." The idea that Syaoran would sit in a public plane when he had his own private one didn't seem likely. "Then his plane hasn't arrived yet." I sighed as my energy finally diminished itself. Except, just as I was about to sit back down, a warm hand covered mine, tightly embracing it.

"It's okay Tomoyo, I'm fine." I turned around and my breath stopped.

_Syaoran._

His eyes were covered by a dark pair of sunglasses, his head even covered with a knit hat, but the smile that radiated from him removed any doubt in my mind of who he was.

Before I could say anything, Eriol rushed up to Syaoran, and placed a hand on his shoulder, pushing him back from me a few steps. Eriol's eyes flew carefully from reporter to reporter as I started to open my mouth to protest. I shut my mouth as soon as I saw the reporters were still searching for the leader of the Li Corporation.

Eriol turned to Syaoran. "You dummy." he half hissed, half said in surprised amazement. "Phones exist you know and in case you didn't realize, you're entire plan of staying unnoticed will blow up any second if we don't split up." Eriol seemed to wait patiently for Syaoran to let go of my hand and when he didn't, stopped him from saying anything back. "Even covered up, you're too noticeable so if you don't let go of Sakura soon, you're going to give yourself away. They all have their eye on her, you know that."

I looked up at Syaoran when he immediately released my hand. He gave a small nod to Eriol, and as if he was never there, he slipped out of the waiting area. My heart leapt from its position, but Eriol pulled me away from Syaoran's direction.

"Neh Sakura-chan. You're going to have to leave here on your own, or else these reporters will get suspicious. Go ahead." he smiled warmly. "Syaoran's waiting for you."

I swallowed. "Where did he go?"

"He says you'll know. We'll stay behind for a while longer and pretend we're still waiting. It'll be a while until they grow suspicious." he signalled me to go once again and I looked at Tomoyo.

"Go ahead Sakura. Li-san will be very happy." she smiled up at Eriol. "We'll wait here a bit longer right Eriol?"

He gave her a warm smile I had never seen before. "Hai." he answered.

I didn't need anymore support. I gave the most grateful thanks I had ever given in my life and forced myself to walk at a normal pace, in order not to attract attention as I walked out of the airport. Perhaps my leaving the two friends had worked out in their own favour, but in my thoughts I had only pictures of warm smiles and chocolate brown hair.

* * *

I was completely out of breath as I arrived at the garden square. I forced myself to take the last few steps into the area and my face lit up as soon as I saw a lean figure sitting on the edge of the stone fountain. 

He must have heard I was out of breath because he took off his sunglasses as he looked up. _They were Syaoran's eyes. _I took the first step to him, then another and another. Before I knew it, I was just a foot away from him, completely in his reach. The shock I felt was indescribable and tears came out from the joy I felt. My hand still tingled from the reminiscence of his warmth. I was scared to move.

He studied me and gave me a distant acknowledgement. His head and his eyes however, were warm and understanding.

_Was this my Syaoran? I had thought he would've have been…happier to see me._

At first, the idea that Syaoran probably wasn't who he was three years ago flashed through my mind. He had been placed in such a professional environment that he had been forced to quickly learn how to take charge. He had dealt with the harsh realities of business and he had learned to deal with difficult individuals. Was he still the childish, simple and kind person he once was? I hadn't even begun to think that Syaoran would come back, changed. At that moment however, it seemed too true.

I remained immobile, watching to see if there was still a spark of Syaoran's character in his oh so familiar body.

"Syaoran." I wanted to see his smile again. I reached out my hand, but stopped when I began to hesitate. His expression didn't change for one second and I didn't know what to do. "Syaoran..." I whispered. "It's me, Sakura." I almost felt the need to introduce myself to him.

He looked up right into my eyes then. "You...did you..." his face cringed. "just tell me who you are?" His eyes were warningly ticked off.

I blinked in surprise and there was no doubt in my mind that he looked angry.

His voice however, made me smile and I couldn't bottle my emotions any longer. I leapt forwards without thinking, wrapping my arms around his neck. The force threw the both of us backwards into the fountain pool and surprised me. When I felt Syaoran's arms pull me closer on top of him as if he wanted himself to receive most of the blunt impact, I mumbled something in protest and dug my face into the ruffles of his clothing.

The water wasn't deep and it was a few minutes before Syaoran said anything.

"Are you hurt?"

The sound of his voice made my heart feel even more funny. I wanted to treasure the sound of it. But I also wanted to clobber myself for jumping on him so spontaneously. "No-I'm fine. Y-you must be cold. Let's get up. Sorry, you're the one who's probably hurt." I felt clumsy and awkward. But the moment I pushed myself off him, Syaoran's hand on my back pushed me back down.

"In a minute." he replied.

My cheek hit his chest immediately and I took a deep breath of Syaoran, the fresh clean smell of alcohol and expensive cologne wafted to my nose. I smiled and dug my face into his wet clothes. "Were you drinking on the plane?" I asked, his clothes muffling my voice.

He lifted me up so my face was no longer facing his chest, but extremely close to his face. "Yeah." he answered. He seemed tired as if he hadn't been able to get a good night's rest. "It's your fault."

"My fau-" My breath caught as I felt his arms wrap themselves around my waist. My eyes grew unfocused at being so close to him. I couldn't finish what I was going to say.

"I'm going…to kiss you." he whispered.

I couldn't think and so I just nodded, the movement so small, I wasn't sure if he detected it.

My lips immediately met his. I was uncertain, but Syaoran's soft pressure against my mouth made me want to respond to his warmth. He gave the smallest of a push on the back of my head to encourage me and my hesitation shattered. I returned his gentle kiss with my own and when I grew to his pattern, his tongue probed gently against my lips, warningly as if holding back in case I wanted to pull away. His warm hands which were resting against my back made me light headed and I opened my mouth to him. When I felt like I no longer had any control of my senses, I moved my own tongue from it's safe haven in the back of my mouth and tentatively upwards. I gasped at the sensation I felt when it made contact with his own tongue's warmth. My senses blurred.

When we pulled apart I felt disoriented and as I focused on Syaoran's face, my face flushed. It didn't help my disposition when he smiled. His entire being seemed lit up from just a few minutes ago and I felt like my heart was pouring with emotion.

"I'd never forget you Sakura." he whispered. "Not ever again." When he realized I was incapable of answering, he smiled again, this time pushing himself out of the water and pulling me up with him.

On our feet, he pushed the hair from his eyes, his profile in my view. I couldn't stop staring. When he saw that I was looking up at him, he gave a surprised glance and blinking he stared back down at me. I looked away almost immediately in embarrassment for getting caught and he released an irritated short growl. With one free hand, he wrapped it around my shoulder, pulling me back to him. My cheek crashed against his chest.

"I didn't think…" he cut off his own trail of words. "I missed you."

My throat caught. It was a nauseous and almost euphoric happiness I felt. It was almost overwhelming.

"Syaoran." I said, thinking it was rare to see him in such a serious mood. "Keep talking." I looked up at him. "I missed your voice."

Syaoran brushed my bangs from my eyes. "Crap…" he uttered quietly. A silent curse followed. "How am I going to leave you again?"

"I saw you on television and magazines."

"I didn't see a picture of you at all." he growled, urging me to lift my head by pushing gently against my chin.

I couldn't contain a blush as he gazed down at me. "You had our picture album."

He leaned down. "I like looking at a moving you." he whispered against my lips.

I swallowed. He was deterring me from asking what I really wanted to know. "Syaoran? _Will _you be leaving again?"

For a moment he was silent. I'd never seen him at a loss for words. It almost looked like he was wondering why I would even ask such a thing. If I hadn't been so eager to hear his answer, I would have started to tap my right foot in impatience.

"Your mother didn't try to stop you from coming back to Japan?" I asked, taking another approach.

He smiled sadly. "I told you." he whispered. "I really don't know how I'll be able to leave you again."

"But you're going to." I said, finishing off his statement.

"Mother does not deny our relationship. She couldn't however, stop nagging."

I tensed. "What did she say?"

He thought for a hesitant second. "Her exact words were... 'How could you pick something like that? Oh, Syaoran, just forget about this one. I'll choose the right one for you.'" He sighed sullenly. "And then some other drabble about shaming the family."

I felt miserable. Syaoran's mother still believed I wasn't good enough for her son. For all I knew, she had already picked out a fiancée for him back in America. That day I'd been kidnapped, I had felt almost happy. I was sure Yelan had learned everything about her son's past, so I had also assumed that that would have been enough for her to accept me. To accept that Syaoran's safety would no longer be threatened just by being with me. Did it all mean I would have to forget about Syaoran after he left, this time for good? That I wouldn't even be able to wait for his return? I didn't know what I had expected Syaoran to say, but in the back of my mind, I'd wondered whether Syaoran had come back to exchange respectful goodbyes. He wasn't one to send an impersonal letter, telling me the truth. But why then? Why had he kissed me the way he had?

I couldn't hold in a defeated sigh. "I understand Syaoran. I'm ruining your relationship with your own mother."

He smirked as if he was amused. "You sure are. Her constant nagging was giving me a headache."

Was I missing something? I felt like I was at the butt end of his joke. "You know, that smile of yours isn't very suitable at this time." I felt like crying. We were about to go our seperate ways and Syaoran was cracking jokes that only he seemed amused by. I started to shake involuntarily. "I hate this." my eyes began to blur. "Why did I ever have to find you again?" No. That wasn't right either. Finding him was the best thing I had ever done. But at the moment, I was a mixture of emotions swirled together and I didn't know what to do.

He stopped smiling. "You...regret finding me?"

He sounded so disheartened I had to look up. "No, of course not!" I cried, to fix the damage. My voice however, came out irritably. I should have been the one being consoled! "I wanted to stop your headaches, not cause you more. But now...what do we do?" It was a stupid question. I knew what I had to do. I had to let Syaoran go. But I couldn't get my mouth to form the words. I needed him to say the final words.

"Don't cry Saku." he pulled me over to him in a swift move. "I have mother's approval."

"What?" _Was that why he had been smiling all that time?_

He smiled down at me. "I don't need her permission to love you Sakura."

"That doesn't answer my question." I said, feeling slightly confused and warmed by his smile at the same time.

"I'm not leaving again. Not for a while."

Hearing that, I almost wanted to hit Syaoran for all his hints otherwise.

"Why was your mother nagging so much then?" I frowned. "Li, Syaoran, if you're lying to me...I'll...I'll clobber you!"

He grinned. "There's my Sakura." he laughed at my narrowed eyes. "I was buying...a gift for you in America. Mother thinks I have..." he made a face. "_bad taste_." he said it as if that could never be the case.

"Like a souvenir?" I asked.

He leaned down to kiss my the crown of my hair. "Something like that." he whispered.

I was growing dizzy with Syaoran's gentle gestures. "Can I see it?"

"Do you have any other questions?" he asked wolfishly.

I frowned as I realized I did. "I thought you were going to arrive in your private plane."

"Why? The news reporters would have been over me in a second if I did. I wanted to be able to blend in. You know...when I saw you, I didn't think I've ever been that happy in my whole life. Who knew how dangerous you'd become to me."

I rolled my eyes. "I didn't see you come out. That's why I thought you were coming in your private plane." I watched as Syaoran smiled mischievously. "Where were you?" I asked, somewhat suspiciously.

He shrugged. "At the airport. I was there a while before you even arrived."

I looked at him, confused.

"You're a lot cuter than before you know." he leaned down.

I flushed. "What about my question…"

"Hmm. I want another kiss. Then I'll answer." he still had that roguish smile.

"That's blackmail." I stated.

He leaned down so our faces were inches away. "Close your eyes." he ordered, ignoring me.

I studied him and when I realized he was serious, I blushed and slowly closed my eyes. As soon as our lips touched however, I opened my eyes and pulled away. "Your turn."

"That was hardly a kiss…" he glared at me and I had to smile. I had missed that look. His expression softened at my smile. "Fine. I had bought two tickets, the first one was pre-ordered for me. It was the plane everyone was waiting for, the one all the reporters thought I was on. But, a few hours earlier I had bought another ticket under an alias. Both planes were headed for Japan, but mine arrived an hour earlier. No one but me knew I was going to catch the first plane."

I was dumbfounded. I hadn't thought Syaoran could have been capable of such a plot. My admiration dwindled a little with some thought. "So why did you reveal yourself after the second plane arrived? What was the point of that? We could have left earlier!"

"I was watching you. I thought you would notice me, but you didn't. I even brushed past you a few times, but you looked so agitated that if I grabbed you then, you would have jumped and caused a scene."

I blinked. "Oh." I said, looking to the ground. _It hadn't been my imagination._ The expensive cologne I had smelt really had been Syaoran's. I bit my bottom lip. "Sorry. It's because I was so excited…to see you." I looked up when he didn't say anything. As if _he_ had any right to be angry with me. "Your last letter...it wasn't funny you know."

He frowned as he thought back. "Ohhh, that letter." he laughed at my glare. "Did Eriol take the picture like I asked?"

I was unamused. "You asked him to take that picture?"

Syoaran shrugged innocently. "The pages of my picture album need filling."

"Tch. You two..." I crossed my arms. Though I was happy that Syaoran's personality had remained intact for the last three years, he too had changed, however slightly. I thought his shoulders appeared to be more broad and he even seemed leaner than before. It made me wonder if he ate right. My view turned to his hair. "Syaoran, let's dye your hair. For your album." I added. "How about pink?"

A disgusted look came on his face. "Are you serious? I can't believe I actually let you dye my hair before. I won't let just anything enter this album." he emphasized it like the album was worthy of giving his life for. "And you," he stated forcefully. "If you ever start introducing yourself to me again, I may be forced to clobber you."

"I suppose we're even then." But I laughed at how ridiculous I must have looked. One look at Syaoran's serious face would have made anyone think that I had insulted him. In my defense however, he had looked entirely unapproachable. I stopped laughing at his expense and to make the scowl vanish from his face, I smiled warmly. "I missed you Syaoran." I couldn't stop looking at him. Just gazing up at him made me happy. I was making mindless conversation so I could keep looking at him.

"As you should have." he grinned, taking his hands out from his wet pockets.

"You!" But I was laughing again as I jumped into his open arms. He caught me and picked me up with ease. I placed my hands on his shoulders and smiled down at his face.

"In university now aren't you Sakura?"

"Second year." I confirmed, proudly, looking down in curiosity at his soft smiling face. "What's with that look?"

He beamed like a child. "It's not illegal anymore."

I didn't have time to even react before he pulled me into his embrace. A wave of heat came over me as I could do nothing to erase my blush.

The sakura petals were blowing and enveloping us as we stood under the large cherry blossom tree. The old swing swung softly in the gentle breeze and it was then that I knew I would never be happier.

"Syaoran?"

He smiled down into my face. "What?"

"You don't still have headaches do you?"

His lifted an eyebrow. "Yeah, whenever you're around me." he winked. "I think…they're for a slightly different reason now."

I laughed. "Syaoran?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you."

"I know." he whispered.

I smiled.And he brought down his head so that our lips met.

* * *

_Finally, after always searching and hoping,_

_You were able to recall who I was_

_In the past, every step you took brought you further away from me._

_I remember how alone you were and the tears that were inside you._

"Hey Syaoran?..."

"Now what?"

"What gift exactly, was your mother nagging you about?"

_Just the silence that surrounded you, made me want to stay by your side_

_Your memories were hidden somewhere in your past_

_And you were never allowed to cry after our silent good bye_

"She was helping pick out something important. Not that I needed the help."

"So you did find something?"

"Yes."

"What is it?"

_So, I'd like to stay in this embrace for as long as I can_

_You're still searching, but there is a smile on your face_

_I'll continue waiting…_

_And I can see as we stand here under the sakura trees_

_You've finally found a course to your stray memories

* * *

_

"I love you, Sakura.Will you marry me?"

_**Fini**_


End file.
